Am I Bisexual or Gay?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by chronozeus, Aug 30, 2008.

  1. chronozeus

    chronozeus New Member

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    I know this is a stupid question but I'm seriously confused. I'm not sure if I'm bisexual or gay. I'm physically attracted to men and sometimes woman, but I usually look at nude men pics online. However, I cannot stand seeing gay sex, and I am severely turned off at that and have no interest in doing it myself. I am however turned on at looking at straight porn of men and women having sex. But I never really got turned on by porn of just women. I do have preferences in woman and am attracted to them, but am very picky, and I'm interested in having straight sex. So what do you guys think? Do gay men even get turned on by looking at or even having straight sex?
     
  2. ohhhey

    ohhhey Member

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    I don't think you should worry about labels, there's no need to box yourself into what you "should" like. Just appreciate what you do find attractive and be comfortable with it. Your feelings will probably change and develop over the years, especially as you have more sexual contact with people. Looking at pictures etc can be very different to the real thing.
     
  3. Beanie

    Verified Gold Member

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    couldnt of put it better myself, very well put ohhhey ;)

    obviously i echo what he has said and would only add that; when you are looking at people try not to think "im attracted to them, and they are *insert gender*", just leave it at the initial reaction.

    oh and by the way, i am by no means speaking for the gay community as a whole but, personally i can get turned on by watching str8 porn but its all to do with the guy so...
     
  4. Hockeytiger

    Hockeytiger Active Member

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    First off, because this is all localized in your mind, none of us can really answer it for you. Only you can. I know that is not an answer you are looking for, but coming to grips and understanding one's own sexuality is something only YOU can do. That being said, there's absolutely nothing wrong about seeking advice, but realize that YOU are the ultimate arbiter of the matter no matter what anyone else says and no matter how forcefully they say it. You own your own mind and that includes your own sexuality and never cede control of it to anyone.

    What part of gay sex turns you off? There are tons of gay and bi men who are not at all into anal sex. They enjoy oral sex and just plain exploring each other's bodies.

    When you watch straight sex, what are you getting off on? Is it the guy only? Is it both? Do you fantasize about exploring her body inside and out (breasts, pussy, etc.)? Or is it more that you fantasize about being the other guy who is fucking the woman and the sexual pleasure you get is more about the guy than about gaining pleasure from fucking the woman?

    When you look at pics of men and are turned on, do you have a desire to touch the guys?

    I really don't have any great answers, and neither will anyone else on these boards, even if they seem to. But with these questions, perhaps you can begin to figure it out.

    BTW some gay men do enjoy watching straight sex, but their focus is on the man.
     
  5. Mr Ed in Mass

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    Just enjoy what you enjoy!!
     
  6. Cochranfan4life

    Cochranfan4life New Member

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    I agree with Mr. Ed!!!
     
  7. chronozeus

    chronozeus New Member

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    I'm not attracted at all to someone's butt and have no interesting putting something in mine or putting my dick in someone else's.

    I'm attracted to both. I like the vaginal penetration and woman's breasts, but am also attracted to the man's penis at the same time.

    Sometimes.


    But thanks for all the input from everyone, it's making me think lol.
     
  8. mickswim

    mickswim New Member

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    it is not a stupid question - someone once said - no stupid questions,, only stpid answers

    dude - not a stupid question - u may wrestle w/ it the rest of your life3 ....
    all i can off4r is ...

    sleep on it - u may find out early or later ..., either way
    enjoy your life...

    m
     
  9. Corius

    Corius New Member

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    You might try going on a diet in which you stick to the basics. So, stop watching porn; get used to the idea that getting to that ideal partner with meaningful sex is what you are after; try to avoid concentrating on the tinsel and fireworks aspects of sex--you can substitute masturbation supported by fantasy which involves your best moments of sex yet to come and deliberately feature both men and women in your fantasy.

    On the postitive side you can go out in society all you want, but make sure that it is peopled with men and women and try to be friendly; remember, you are not after sex because you have accepted the idea that sex has to have a firm basis in caring friendship. Stay open to surprises. It happens all th time. The fellow who declared himself to be 100% straight just might, under the right circumstances discover that unacknowledged other side of his sexuality. And, the same kind of thing happens to some fellows who declare themselves 100% gay. You really can't know unless you are open to the posibility. You can apply the label when you are convinced that you have come into contact with the fullness of your unique sexuality, even that may surprise you.
     
    #9 Corius, Aug 30, 2008
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2008
  10. B_Sex_On_Fire

    B_Sex_On_Fire New Member

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    Dude, don't label yourself. Fuck who you want to fuck, love who you want to love, be attracted to who you want to be attracted to. Don't put yourself in a box. :)
     
  11. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    No labels man, just have sex with what ever gender you please.
     
  12. nabludatelj

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    heya... actually happened that I have the same problem..))) Dont know what orientation do I have...
    Really the same situation... ))).. so u r not alone who cant decide on what is he..)))

    :smile:
     
  13. bigbull29

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    You are not alone, buddy. I'm 31 and am very, very confused. :confused:

    Try not to label or limit yourself.

    If you ever want to talk online, let me know.

    Take care and don't think about it all the time:smile:
     
  14. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    Sometimes confusion seems to exist when admitting the truth would be too painful.

    I urge not sweating the label stuff. It's only for the benefit of everyone else and you don't see them worrying about your label anyway so why bother with it? It's just a tool they want you to give them so they can judge you.
     
  15. Principessa

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    You're bi-sexual and that's okay. :smile:

    Next question. :cool:
     
  16. aderian

    aderian New Member

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    I have a friend like you the same problem but believe me he is married , and I use his wife sometimes while he is at home too. he told he cant cum only if seeing me fuck her and cum on her, I think he is bi
     
  17. bigbull29

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    Yes, I agree.:wink:
     
  18. thickmick

    thickmick Member

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    I agree no point in pissing about the subject 100% forget about it :biggrin1:
     
  19. D_Pubert Stabbingpain

    D_Pubert Stabbingpain Account Disabled

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    Liking or not liking anal anal sex does not make you either gay or str8 or bi. At some future moment there will most likely be either a woman or a man who will insert a finger in your anus just as you start to cum and you will be hooked! :biggrin1:

    Now we have to rule out whether or not you want breasts and a penis on the same person.

    If you seriously need a label and fantasize about having sex with both genders, sounds bi to me.
    :smile:
     
  20. D_Pubert Stabbingpain

    D_Pubert Stabbingpain Account Disabled

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    After seeing your pix, I would like to help "un-confuse" you bigbull. :biggrin1:
     
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