Among asexuals, have you been evaluated medically?

Scarletbegonia

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Also not a truthful person. You're revealing a lot about yourself in this string.
So are you.

Asexuality, as a form of sexual identity, is not a medical condition, something I’d expect a former MD to know.

Asexuality, again as identity, is not a sudden loss or change in libido.


I bet demisexuality would melt your brain.
 

HornyUnicorn

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So are you.

Asexuality, as a form of sexual identity, is not a medical condition, something I’d expect a former MD to know.

Asexuality, again as identity, is not a sudden loss or change in libido.


I bet demisexuality would melt your brain.
Factually wrong again. I never said asexuality is a medical condition. What I said is that a medical evaluation could reveal a cause in certain cases. Nor did I ever say that asexuality involved a loss or change in libido. I suspect, in fact, that in most cases which involve a medical condition, the libido is always low. You are also factually wrong in stating that I'm a "former" MD. Not only am I still an MD, but I'm still fully licensed (and with well over 3 decades of experience).
 

nhguy78

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Coming from a perspective of being asked a lot surrounding the medicalization of sexuality, i see the patterns here. When i came out initially as gay, i was asked my parents if my testosterone was low. I knew back then that sexual orientation is not a hormonal thing. This person is a doctor and should know this. I am a lab tech with far less education and i know this. He refused to read the legit asexuality resources i gave him. Instead he relied on Wikipedia that can be edited by anyone with an account. Look at the others who have responded as well. Look at what they say. He attacked them, too.

If hormones or any other thing would affect sexual topic of sorts, it would seem to be more about libido and overall desire or maybe even submissiveness. Of course, we know that libido and sexual attraction and even sexual willingness are mutually exclusive ideas. One may affect the others but they independent actors on a person's sexuality. I, for an example, have a decent libido and may make me more sexually willing to engage in sexual behaviors but the sexual attraction is negligible. Rarely do i think, oh I'd love to do this or that with/to them. If anything, i want to be close, sensual in a skin hunger sort of way.
 
D

deleted955030

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Will you please stop.
stop being a victim. It was a valid question by the op.
this is a porn site not a platform for nonsense micro triggers and starting arguments.
im asexual and understand the question fully
Hmm. Maybe I missed something. The thread shows two individuals answered OP's question. It also shows OP did not like the response of the second, which he could have glossed over. Instead, he chose to question the second individual about what he could and could not say in the response to the individual informing him the question was not okay to ask, not to not ask the question; this is what initially poisoned the thread as OP claims another potentially did as it quickly created animosity where there was none. Did I... miss something?

Everything OP said in his response to the second individual - and some other statements like there being little research into asexuality, could have been laid out in the op to avoid miscommunication, especially on a topic where there is already a lot of misinformation and assumptions, some of the latter which he displayed. Statements like "asexuals can have fulfilling lives, but could certainly be missing out on something important" and 'since the very definition of libido is a "person's sexual desire" (libido), by definition, asexuals have low libido," are problematic.

In the former statement, it is the faulty implications. Important? What is? Sex? Of which many asexuals actually have had and do. (His statement is no less applicable to anybody). Just because a significant enough majority of other people find it important? Just because he thinks it possibly the greatest pleasure in life - which, in my opinion, are representative of mindset due heavily to his gender identity, sexual orientation, and socialization? That is not to say individuals of other genders, sexual orientation, etc., do not find it important, or that every person in his demographics will; rather, that it does not go without notice the trend, be it a stereotype those of his demographics simply buy into or something of actual great importance to them, that it is potentially the most important thing to them, and often stringently based around physicality and assumed characteristics thereof.

In the latter, the very definition from Wikipedia he uses, which at least one has noted as problematic, does not cast ALL asexuals as having low or no libido, though he erroneously presumes so using faulty logic. In fact, to repeat, he stated, "according to Wikipedia, 'Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in or desire for sexual activity. It may be considered a sexual orientation or the lack thereof...' The word "OR" is extremely important here. That means, for instance, an asexual, as at least one individual has pointed out, can lack sexual attraction to other people, but in fact have a normal or higher libido, whatever "normal" even means here.

Nonetheless, to answer OP's question, no, I have not. Being a demisexual, which may throw him for a loop given some of the assumptions he has displayed and tried to argue as factual (despite others responses he has mostly disregarded except the portions he did not like and thereafter responded to), it is rare for me to be sexually attracted to a person, as in want to have sex with him, without an emotional bond. An even then, it is furthermore unlikely for me to actually engage in sex even on the rare occasion. In fact, any time I have engaged in sex without having/or having a damaged emotional bond, sex has been less than pleasurable. I can count on one hand the number of times I orgasmed in roughly a hundred sexual encounters involving roughly thirty (different) people to include boyfriends and a husband, which required a lot of mental gymnastics. That does not mean I am not sexually aroused by porn, erotica, or even sexual touching, but rather that my what the OP may consider "low" libido is due to the fact I do not seek sex to be validated based purely/mostly on my physicality and assumed characteristics, but rather who I am as a person, which is not reduced to my physicality or anybody else's. (If he does not like that response, he can just gloss over this too.)
 
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K.Dst

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I'm a physician myself, so I kinda inquired on my own.

I was wondering if I had some form of MS or a tumour, so I did a brain MRI. Nothing.
I also checked my hormones level because I always assumed I was low on testosterone and found out they were completely normal...

So yeah, it's mostly in my head, but that's where most of sex is anyway?
 
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powerbook06

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Among the asexual members, I wonder (especially among the men), if you've ever discussed this with your physician (or NP or PA-C), and been evaluated professionally. I'm a retired physician, and have had occasion to find medical causes for lack of sexual excitement (such as Klinefelter's Syndrome).
I have not discussed this with my doctor but I a take a blood test for other reasons each year. Everything comes out normal. The test is usually cardio-targeted but sometimes we apply the full protocol, testosterone included. Regarding my clinical picture, the only remarkable feature is that I am unusually slender for my age but my doctors think that I am quite normal and masculine.

So, my physical parameters are good and my psychological state at least as good, with endurance for every kind of challenge in my everyday life. Sexual desire is zero though, sometimes below zero. Not sure if that matters but my morning erections when my normal sleep cycle is not disrupted are still going strong (like very stiff).
 
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aheidla

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I've always had regular medical check-ups and all of my labs have been normal. My hormone levels are normal. My reproductive health is relatively normal. The only diagnosis I've ever had that is directly relevant to sexual activity is vaginismus. I was also diagnosed with depression in my teens and still have it to this day, but that hasn't killed my libido.

I've just, personally, never been interested in having sex with another person. I've always had a healthy libido and would masturbate to resolve any urges, but the desire to engage in sexual activity with another person has never been there and no person has ever invoked sexual desire because I don't experience sexual attraction to people. If I happen to experience sexual desire, it's usually at random and directed at absolutely no one and nothing. It's 100% a physical urge. That's all.

When I've been in situations where sex is about to or was taking place, physiologically and mentally, I was completely shut down because I wasn't sexually attracted to the other person, at all. If I were male, I would likely still be a virgin because due to never being aroused in those situations, sex would've never happened. Females can just "lay there and take it," I suppose. So, sometimes it's easier to miss asexuality in females.

This merely means sexual attraction, for me, is nonexistent which is the very definition of asexuality. It does not mean that there is low or nonexistent sexual desire. That is called hypoactive sexual desire disorder and is a legitimate medical issue. It is not, however, asexuality. My, and many asexuals', sexual desire is fine. It's just that no one "does it" for us and many of us just prefer to "handle it" ourselves. I, for one, absolutlely can't get aroused with another person present. In fact, the presence of another person makes arousal, for me, basically impossible. Like a bucket of ice water.
 

ennislivvy

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The problem with the question of 'have you been medically checked out'...is that for many asexuals this is tantamount to asking a gay person if they have tried talking to their doctor about getting their gay fixed with chemicals and therapy.

This isn't to say that people don't have medical conditions that do affect their libido detrimentally, but those conditions are not asexuality. Usually the hallmark of it being a 'medical condtion' is the level of impediment the fall in libido has; or some other psycho-physical disconnect (something like anhedonia), IE there's usually a dissatisfaction involved in the patient resultant in 'I'm not enjoying sex' 'I want to enjoy sex'. Asexuals tend to not have these kinds of disconnects, if they even can vocalize what the disconnect would even be if it were to happen, as some asexuals literally don't have a concept of sexual attraction, just like how a color blind person would have hard time explaining the color green to a color sighted person. If there are disconnects that Asexuals have, it generally is external, IE if they have partners and are sexually active, conveying the level of sexual activity they are comfortable/willing to engage with, or if they are grey expressing what kind of sexual activity they desire when they want sexual activity, or if they are fully truly completely asexual conveying to others 'I don't want sex' and being respected on that front.

And whilst I cannot speak for the truly full on asexual, as I'm very...very...gray in complicated ways that I'm not interested in parsing here. The stats on this are rather startling, as even now yet, asexuality is often medically treated, if the asexual outs themselves as ACE to a medical practitioner or therapist. It is getting better, but many medical professionals will still at least try or insist on and infer some kind of medical issue and possibly prescribe 'treatment' to restore libido to asexuals. So many asexuals are super disincentivized from bringing it up with their doctors.
 

ennislivvy

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I've always had regular medical check-ups and all of my labs have been normal. My hormone levels are normal. My reproductive health is relatively normal. The only diagnosis I've ever had that is directly relevant to sexual activity is vaginismus. I was also diagnosed with depression in my teens and still have it to this day, but that hasn't killed my libido.

I've just, personally, never been interested in having sex with another person. I've always had a healthy libido and would masturbate to resolve any urges, but the desire to engage in sexual activity with another person has never been there and no person has ever invoked sexual desire because I don't experience sexual attraction to people. If I happen to experience sexual desire, it's usually at random and directed at absolutely no one and nothing. It's 100% a physical urge. That's all.

When I've been in situations where sex is about to or was taking place, physiologically and mentally, I was completely shut down because I wasn't sexually attracted to the other person, at all. If I were male, I would likely still be a virgin because due to never being aroused in those situations, sex would've never happened. Females can just "lay there and take it," I suppose. So, sometimes it's easier to miss asexuality in females.

This merely means sexual attraction, for me, is nonexistent which is the very definition of asexuality. It does not mean that there is low or nonexistent sexual desire. That is called hypoactive sexual desire disorder and is a legitimate medical issue. It is not, however, asexuality. My, and many asexuals', sexual desire is fine. It's just that no one "does it" for us and many of us just prefer to "handle it" ourselves. I, for one, absolutlely can't get aroused with another person present. In fact, the presence of another person makes arousal, for me, basically impossible. Like a bucket of ice water.

It's also easier for women to pass asexually as that pernicious little common knowledge that women can't really enjoy/want sex, is still rather prevalent. Whereas if a man is seemingly disinterested in sex there is something very wrong with them...or they may secretly be gay, if you are in a more conservative arena, or shy, or depressed or autistic or any other garish excuses for why oh why a guy wouldn't possibly be trying to have sex with every person they encounter.

As stated earlier I'm very grey. It takes a lot to get me in a condition to want to have sex with someone, and even then I have a lot of other hang ups not related to my greyness that often leaves sex very unenthusing. But even without those hang-ups I just don't...have sex. I don't actively search it out, I desire it occasionally in very specific situations with specific individuals I may find attractive, but never enough to actually go out to places to pick up people, and even then I find my own personal experiences with sex to be...underwhelming. I explained it to my most recent partner who was...very insecure that I wasn't as apoplectic as he thought I would be with his artful ministrations as 'orgasms to me feel like that moment when you have finished doing your taxes...it's a relief, some pressure's let off, but it's just kinda "welp at least that's done now"...that but itchier, with flares of electrocution.' Does it feel good? Kinda...I guess...it doesn't feel bad. But is it as great a good pizza, or as satisfying a nice walk along the beach...eh...

I experience so much more enjoyment in the preluding activities, the kissing, the touching, and the play, than I do when it comes to the genital stimulation...which always just feels tedious if I'm honest. I don't experience the intimacy when it comes to coitus, or fellatio or cunnilingus. I do those things, and will allow them (to varying degrees of willingness) to be done to me for my partner's sake, because I realize that they desire it, and I'm not adverse to it...but I don't get much out of those actions, as much as I do with a well done kiss, or a gentle placement of a hand on my chest or a particularly intimate hug.