Anal sex! Compulsory for gay guys or not?

nudeyorker

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For me it's the Main course, but there are plenty of things to enjoy on the starter and dessert menus as well. Only go where your comfort level allows you and don't let anyone bully you into what you are not>
 
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kiwi_in_uk

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Guys,

Thanks for the advice and the compliments. I guess the internet is the way forward to meet someone who has similar reservations and then try to move forward from there.

Thanks again,
Tony
 

LouisVauban

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I agree with most of what I've read here.

Not compulsory for all. I've known many gay men who are non-anal and are leading perfectly contented and very sexually fulfilled lives.

BUT.... the important thing is to BE HONEST with your partner in what YOU want. I hate a tease and I love anal. If someone is just "yessing" me to get me into bed, it infuriates me. I'm always honest about what I want... and I want it to end in fucking (ALWAYS with condoms). As long as someone says, "Am not really into that," there's no problem and I can make a decision as to whether or not I want to continue. Sometimes, a casual mutual oral session can be hot... but, I couldn't have that for long-term.

My first lover kept promising me... "After we're together 3 months, " "After we move in together," "Soon... I promise. I really want to." Long story short: For our second anniversary, he bought me a dildo and was crushed that I wasn't "thrilled." A dildo is NOT your lover's cock.

As for anal: It took me a few years to get into. I didn't really realize the pleasure it could REALLY bring until I was in my mid-twenties... I didn't think it was disgusting, just wasn't into it. Then, the day came that I was properly relaxed and with an amazing partner. I slip down that shaft and have never looked back.

Am also a little amazed by all the "unhygienic" references here. Rather archaic in today's world. Before I start a good sex session, I ALWAYS use a cleansing enema. There is nothing "dirty" or disgusting about it. And done properly, an ass can be as clean as any other body part. And trust me, there have been some body parts I've witnessed in my years that would be considered far more disgusting.
 

Matthew

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I've had a couple fine long-term relationships with no anal play at all.
 

allan1015

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Kiwi, fear not for you are not alone ;)

I'd always known I had an attraction for cock, but went through the motions and got involved with a girl, then another one, finally one more. That's about 7 years of trying to make relationships with girls work. During that whole time I had one gay encounter (oral only) between 2 het relationships, I just didn't want to cheat on my then gf's. During those 7 years I'd read and watch gay porn, was intrigued by the anal, but never ever saw myself doing it. That's an exit not an entrance right? And it's dirty to boot! After I said goodbye to straight relationships and played around with guys some, I eventually found myself in my first gay relationship.

First thing I figured out was I'm a hell of alot better gay boyfriend than I am a straight boyfriend ;) Next thing I found was, I'm in love with this guy, and I really wanna have sex with him, 'real' sex, go ALL the way, that sort of thing. Seven years of regular intercourse is hard to give up! Without making a long story too much longer, that ended up being the wedge that eventually ended my first gay relationship. I hadn't had intercourse in the 3 years we were together, he'd never been with a girl, never been involved with any sort of penetrative sex, and was very happy for us to continue slurping on each others rods for the forseeable future.

Cut to my next relationship, he's had experience with anal, also been with girls. He'd been a bottom mostly in previous relationships and I'd been dieing to top a guy. It was flat out amazing! Anal sex with a guy was everything I'd never allowed myself to think it could be LOL. Plus, he get OFF on it so much. I did my reading up on prostates before we did it together the first time, had my lay of the land so to speak, and I made sure I hammered that button with my cock. I wasn't prepared for just how much pleasure he got out of it, so it wasn't long before fingers, dills and more were being thrust into my own bum. Now I'm still versatile, but one of the biggest power bottoms you're ever likely to meet! The thrill of my first anal orgasm got me started down a road I am happy to never see the end of, the journey is just too much fun!

So ya, long story longer, it was intercourse withdrawal which got me over the first bits of anal taboo programming we all went through growing up, and first hand witnessing of just how much pleasure is waiting for us there that got me to try it myself. So from completely against anal to power bottom in less than 5 years, hurrah! That's my story in a nutshell. I don't find anal disgusting at all anymore, I've educated myself on the ins and outs.

My development is my own however, and there's no saying you ever have to like or even try anal and I've met several couples who just don't do anal together and are very happy. Read this part carefully: There are no rules for how a relationship between two people should be conducted, you're free to make your own. It's healthy and normal so long as everyone's happy and noone's being hurt.

Cheers,
Hairyguy

I do not think that could be put anybetter! Especially the last part.
Anal isn't compulsory, but don't discount out of hand either.
God gave man a prostate for a very pleasurable reason.:biggrin1:
 

allan1015

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Anal sex is a perk of being gay and having another asshole to play around with...besides one's own. It is not universally practiced, but it is very prevalent! Responsible anal sex is the norm, not precisely what you think you have viewed in porn. There is an overwhelming amount of staging involved in making a professional porn video...sequences such as wiping and washing the penis are cut or not filmed at all. Even in the making of a professional porn film, there is recognition that bacteria could sicken the actors and precautions are the norm! Realize that unclean and unhealthy and unsafe looking practices do sell films!


Another excellent observation. Don't judge anal sex based on porn. Porn tends to take anal sex to the most profitable extreme
 

cfr

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It took a love of a man for me to have anal sex. I started at the age of 12 masturbating with my best friend that went to sucking him off and then him on top of me cumming between my legs. But never did anal sex enter into it. I was not going to go there.
Then we both met our wives at the same party and we both got married like in the straight world. After 5 years and 2 children and on a trip to Las Vegas I met the right man for a loving relationship with a man. There was no comparrison to having sex with a woman. I went through a terrible divorce and went on seeing Donald who by the way was really into anal sex. I fought it till one night with a few happy drugs I consented. He was very slow and patient and I have to tell U that there is nothing like it. It is the kind of sex that a man and a woman have. After that I met the real love of my life and have just celebrated 30 years with this man. We both enjoy annal sex and lucky us that both of us enjoy being the top and bottom.
Good luck young man and just enjoy what ever is good for U.
 

scherzando

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hey kiwi,
i thought like you when i found out that i am gay. Now - about 20 years later - i really enjoy fucking men. Sometimes - but it takes a lot of confidence by me and a nice hard cock (not too big) by him - i enjoy being fucked. You should learn about your ass, before you start, active or passive, even if you decide, to stay with women. You can feel your prostate only from within your ass, and its the part of your body which gives you the utmost pleasure. Try an Aneros if you want to learn about that; easy tool, even if its rather expensive. You find more about that on the internet. You learn to control your penis and your orgasm from within, and i tell you its great to cum without touching your penis.

The first time you try being fucked will be difficult. It hurts if he goes in, but when you relax, its just great. Think of that if you fuck others.

Use lube and if you are shy of shit, make sure that he ore you are empty before putting anything in.

Its not compulsory to have anal sex, if you are gay, but its a great experience.

BUT ITS CUMPULSORY TO USE A CONDOM; ACTIVE OR PASSIVE!!!

Scherzando
 

snodgrass

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Kiwi
I being an old fart haven't quit seen it all, but what I have noticed passing through is that probably slightly more like anal than those who do not. I never have been one for taking what I used to call that undignified position and responding to the topper with "what do you mean it hurts pretty?" Unfortunately I have little to offer in either department. My talent seems to lie in the oral arena. Unfortunately the fly paper has gone a little dry! So the only thing I can say is "make hay while the sun shines!" and develope those lip and tongue muscles.
 

zeroeffect

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I know, kind of off the subject (or at least opposite of the subject)...but I am totaly straight. The thoght of sex with a man is repulsive to me. But I like anal sex (my ass stuffed). It's an amazing experience.
 

LouisVauban

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I know, kind of off the subject (or at least opposite of the subject)...but I am totaly straight. The thoght of sex with a man is repulsive to me. But I like anal sex (my ass stuffed). It's an amazing experience.


Am confused by this. Meaning you don't mind a cock up your ass... or you lke dildoes, etc....

Not judging, just asking.
 

LouisVauban

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No problem. I get it. But maybe you should try hiring a hustler... no strings, leave the cash on the counter. Gotta tell yah... the real thing vs dildoes? GET THE REAL THING. I understand the gay cock thing... so, follow my advice... get a big dicked hustler... no looking, no problem. Be spread-eagled on the bed (have your gf there)... make sure he uses a condom and then TRY IT! So much better than dildoes... warm and THICK!
 

D_Weeslet Weenywacker

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Anal sex:

It depends on how you feel. I do like it, but I always am more confortable with my partner than with an stranger.

For me, it's the least thing I like when being with a man: I enjoy much more kissing and oral, than anal.

I bet everyone is different, but I have come across many others who think like me.

If you are with the right person you can enjoy as much as you never had imagine only looking at him/her.
 

musicman

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Hey guy. Anal sex is not compulsory at all! I haven't had a guy inside me since 1996, but that doesn't make me straight. ;-)
 

PAHARDJOCK

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I learned to be a bottom cause most guys ive been with couldnt fit my thick cock up their ass or would gag if if fucked their mouth. I personally love getting my ass fucked. And when it hits my prostate just the right spot it gives me a major orgasm. Some times I cum twice while riding my bf's cock. I guess you could say I'm a bit of an ass slut. Totally love sitting on dude's face while he eats my ass then flips me over and drives it home with a big fat cock spraying my ass with his jizz. Only bareback w/ BF.