Anal sex question?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by D_Polyxena Pasties, May 9, 2009.

  1. D_Polyxena Pasties

    D_Polyxena Pasties New Member

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    This probably a stupid question to some of you, so let me say sorry in advance. I'm in a long distance relationship with my on and off boyfriend of one year. I've always wanted to try anal sex, but have been to scared. He's finally convinced me that I can trust him. I've read a lot of stories online where girls asses are totally ruined from anal sex... I'm guess "too much"? Soooo is this fact? And any tips for first time anal sex? How much did it hurt?
     
  2. StraightCock4Her

    StraightCock4Her New Member

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    I'd like to totally ruin your ass... I mean, I doubt this is true..
     
  3. D_Polyxena Pasties

    D_Polyxena Pasties New Member

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    You doubt what's true, that you'd ruin my ass? Lol
     
  4. StraightCock4Her

    StraightCock4Her New Member

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    I doubt that anal can ruin your ass, madam. Just used some lube and make sure you play with it a little first to get it loosened up. You should be fine.
     
  5. D_Polyxena Pasties

    D_Polyxena Pasties New Member

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    Thanks. I figured it probably wasn't true, or was from a lot more than average typical anal sex. Google is sometimes the tool of the devil.
     
  6. Ed69

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    My wife and I have been doing anal for years and she is still ok.Use some lube relax and ride the wave!You'll be fine.
     
  7. ManlyBanisters

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    Hi Maggie. The very first time I tried anal sex it did hurt and I stopped and said 'sorry, I thought I wanted to but that fucking hurt'. My friend was by no means the most well endowed chap on the planet and when I did get anal right it was with an above average guy and rarely hurt at all. The guy I'm with now is bigger again and it never hurts, nor 'ruins' my ass. I'll explain what I did wrong the first time, perhaps it will help.

    Firstly, as Straight says, lube. You don't have to squirt gallons of Eros Platinum all over yourself and him, I find that the natural lube from my pussy on his cock and maybe a little saliva do the job just fine. But maybe for a first time a little artificial lube would be a good thing to have on hand. The other thing is to relax - I don't mean be in a calm mood, I mean unclench your asshole. My first time, well, the one that failed, I completely failed to relax that muscle and it hurt like hell, a nasty stabbing pain - that has happened to me a few times since and it is unpleasant. What you need to do is relax as if you were sitting on the toilet and about to pass something the other way. I'm assuming that you know you shouldn't try anal unless you are confident you don't have anything waiting to come the other way :eek: - there are threads and threads on anal prep in the 'Sex with a Large Penis' section if you want to go read up. So anyway - relax that muscle as if to let something out and it will not hurt as you let something in.

    As for the idea of your ass being ruined - you say you trust your guy so that just won't happen. He's not going to want to hurt you and he's not going to fuck you hard and fast the first time unless you decide you really want him to. Plus the anus is fairly resilient and only takes marginally longer than the vagina to recover from a good, hard fuck. Personally I have never felt loose at all after anal, and my boyfriend's got a fat cock.

    Just another thought, are you a total anal virgin or have you had some finger / toy play? If you are a total anal virgin it might not be a bad idea to 'practise' a few times before you go for full on anal. If you have a slim vibe put a bit of lube on it and practise relaxing the muscle to slide it up your ass.

    I hope you have a good time with it. And a 'trip report' would be nice :wink:
     
  8. alex_moore

    alex_moore Member

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    It sure can happen if you or he is careless. If you're careful and ease into it you'll be fine. Just remember an ass isn't like pussy, you need to manually lube it really well.

    Take your time, go easy. and if it hurts. Stop. You don't need to go all porno-shoot the first time.

    That's for the second through hundredth time ;)
     
  9. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    I applaud your resolve to take it in the ass and am glad that you have had the best possible advice.
     
  10. funtimeinbed

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    i had anal sex with my girlfriend and she did not like it at all and to be honest i didnt care for it much. maybe the second time will be better but the first was a no go for me
     
  11. B_Mademoiselle Rouge

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    Ok i had anal in highschool from maybe a slightly larger than average guy, it didnt really hurt, honestly it didnt feel like much. Then i tried it again after i got married. My husbands dick is just too hard and girthy under the head. We get the head in and then its not going any further. The pain of trying to stretch my ass beyond is like off the charts. I would get a huge tear. No matter how much lube. It's like those people who come no where close to fitting their fist in their own mouth. Even lube wouldnt help.
     
  12. B_willy5904

    B_willy5904 New Member

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    My wife and I often have anal sex. Every partner I have had sex with has had anal sex with me. I have only had 2 partners that did not enjoy it, and decided not to do it again with me. My partners have told me that though they were originally concerned about my length and width, when it came down to actually doing have anal sex size was not an impediment.

    My preferred position is to have my partner on their back with me above them between their legs, and their legs spread wide. I use lots of lube, and I go very slowly; even today after 20 yrs of anal sex there are days when I will take 10 minutes to fully penetrate my wife. I have had partners where I needed to go much slower to start on their first time. I had one partner that I would take over 20 minutes each time we had anal sex.

    In this position I can see my partner's eyes during the entire session. My wife can stroke her shaved pussy as I work my big penis into her ass. She is also able to easily communicate with me, both verbally and non-verbally what she wants me to do. If she suddenly needs me to slow or not penetrate any farther the can use her hand to block my hips and stop me. Overall, we find this face to face position much more intimate than the doggie style position that many consider when having anal sex for the first time.

    Good luck and let us know how it goes. Remember, intimate, on your back, lots of lube, and go slow for more mojo.
     
  13. D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

    D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah Account Disabled

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    No lies, it is going to hurt like hell the first time, mostly because you are expecting it to hurt. Best advise i could give would be now start playing with toys in your ass to get used to the feeling, use different sizes etc. and ALWAYS use plenty of lube.

    On the night try having a hot bath or shower before you start anything and you will be amazed at how much more relaxed that will make you and your muscles.


    And the big tip. AS HE PUSHES IN YOU PUSH OUT TO OPEN YOUR ASS UP
    :yup:
     
  14. Bbucko

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    That is a really great tip.

    FWIW, I've been enjoying anal sex as a top for over 30 years (fucking, toys, even fisting) and I've never seen an ass I'd call "ruined", just like I've ever met a bottom who needs disposable adult diapers. That's really just a lot of sexist/misogynist/homophobic bullshit: don't buy into it.

    Also: when it comes to any questions about your health, Google is the last place to start. It sequences pages for many reasons, but accuracy is not one of them.
     
  15. TimBuckTooth

    TimBuckTooth New Member

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    At first, my partner was worried about the pain of anal, but a lot of postings (including from women) on this site convinced her that it could be both enjoyable and pain-free, and she has now gotten to where she really enjoys it while we're doing it.

    But then she still didn't want to do it very often (more than once every ~2 weeks), because she was concerned about her backdoor getting "ruined" too, but now she seems less concerned about that after reading some of the other posts on LPSG about that-- plus she has now noticed how her nice, tight pucker comes back pretty quickly afterwards (usually within 1-2 hours), so she knows she's not going to become incontinent or something.

    However, this leaves the last concern-- she is often fine throughout (even has orgasms during), and more often than not her backdoor isn't even sore the next day, but, as she told me today, she often will get indigestion-like symptoms later on, like a day later, that can sometimes last for several days-- as she says, because "it's bit bigger than normal, and it pushes things back up in there further".

    In other words, she now doesn't get hurt by it going in, and she actually enjoys it a lot while it's in, and her backdoor is not "ruined"-- it puckers up fine by later that night, and it rarely bothers her the next day-- but she dislikes it when she gets an upset stomach one or two days later, from having a big one all the way up her backdoor... so, do any of you know any possible remedies to this problem, short of not doing it at all (or not going all the way in)? Is there an angle/position that tends not to lead to stomach pain later on? Is the only answer not to go so far in? Or does it correlate with how fast/hard I give it to her? I can give her two or three fingers back there without any problems later on, but the full Monty seems to be too much (a day later)-- about half the time.
     
  16. B_johnschlong

    B_johnschlong New Member

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    For most human females, anal sex is painful and annoying, because the anus is not made for penetration - the anus is designed for defecation.

    That's why most women don't like it.

    The desire for anal sex is mainly a desire coming from pubescent boys.

    But if you do want to try it (most women do it to get off the annoying begging of their husbands and lovers), here's some basic advice:

    1. before you begin, tell your partner the real reason why you want to try it: because you want to please him, because you just want to experience it, etc...

    2. this will set things clear, and gives you an exit strategy in case it doesn't work out

    3. clean your anus well - because faeces can infect both your vagina and his cock; you can clean out your anus with an enema

    4. use a set of dildos before you try; prepare yourself and open your anus with a small dildo, then a bigger one, etc... until you think you can manage

    5. then, when you're open and clean, put enough lubricant on your anal opening and inside, around the two rings of anal muscles which are designed to push out your faeces

    6. make sure your man is as hard as possible, before entry

    7. let him enter your anus very carefully

    8. try to relax your anal muscles, the first ring is painful; once he's past that ring, the pain will ease

    9. before he can start to thrust his penis into your rectum, you must keep it there, still, for a while, so your muscles can adapt -- remember, the anus is not meant for penetration, only for defecation

    10. then allow him to thrust up and down

    11. tell him (beforehand) that he should not put his dirty penis from your asshole into your vagina - because the risk of infections is quite high

    12. when he has cum inside your rectum, go to the bathroom and clean the semen out, with an enema

    13. then discuss what happened: two people came together to have (probably painful, unpleasant and complicated) unnatural sex - let him know clearly if you think it was all the trouble

    Good luck.
     
    #16 B_johnschlong, Jun 20, 2009
    Last edited: Jun 20, 2009
  17. lickme69

    lickme69 New Member

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    I am not an expert on it because I just tried it for the first time with my BF. If he goes slow and is gentle it can be a very enjoyable experience. The key is to make sure UR relaxed. If you tighten up it hurts. You absolutely need to make sure you are well lubed and have him play with your asshole to loosen it up. It helps if he has done it before.
    I did it for the first time a couple of weeks ago and I love it. WE have doen it quite a few times now. I think he likes it because he asks me to do it alot.
    Go for it. Let us know how it all cums out.
     
  18. lickme69

    lickme69 New Member

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    I too have experienced stomach pains a day after anal sex. I would love to hear from anyone how to stop this or prevent it. It doesn;t happen every time, just sometimes. Any suggestions?
     
  19. Rubenesque

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    To each their own. I hate it.

    Not because it's painful, although it is uncomfortable. But because as they're pulling out it feels like you're passing a stool - one of the least sexy sensations going surely!
     
  20. psidom

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    And the big tip. AS HE PUSHES IN YOU PUSH OUT TO OPEN YOUR ASS UP

    quoted for the truth.

    also before you think about fucking anally, put a butt plug in
    for about a half an hour previous to the buttsex,helps assist the relaxation.

    also remember the enema with "distilled" water
    tap water has microbe shite in it.
     
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