I just wanted to get some opinions on what to think about a situation that I was involved in recently...
One of my closest friends and I hadn't hung out in a while due to work and other scheduling issues, so we made plans to hang out and do 'guy stuff' last weekend. I am the last of my friends to still be single and my buddy, whom we'll call Fred has been with his wife for about three years. They met when she was married and he was involved with the mother of one of his kids. Long story short, they fooled around on the side and eventually got married.
So, I arrive at Fred's and learn that his wife is supposed to be going out with her female friends while Fred and I go do our guy's night out. Cool.
After some chit chat and teasing between the two of them (his insecurity was showing through at times) we head out. Now, mind you, Fred and I are close enough that he has confided in me about some dalliances that have occured while he's been with his wife, but I don't judge. We had some pretty wild times together when we were younger and haven't missed out on anything when it comes to women, IMHO.
There we are at the club, having drinks and talking, he's buzzed enough that he starts talking about 'hooking up' with a girl tonite...I must add at this point that this was a majorly target-rich environment and full displays of availability we going on. I've got my best wing-man by my side, and he knows from past experience that I've got his back as well. We've done this before, know the routine, should go down like clock-work. At the very least, we'll practice a little catch-and-release, and have some good memories of a great night together.
We head downstairs and pick out a prime piece of real estate near the door to stake out, complete with a table and a view of the dance floor, restrooms and the patio. We're standing there and talking and out of nowhere his demeanor changes and he makes some off-handed comment about 'Oh yeah, I'm getting some tonight' and starts to smile and looks over my shoulder. I'm thinking he's found a target and I turn around and his wife is standing behind me, drink in hand.
I greet her and then walk off to the restroom, confused and a little (ok, a lot) annoyed...I'm having a serious WTF moment that lasts and lasts and won't go away...I head out onto the patio to get some air and end up discussing the situation with the bartender who agrees with me that it was unusual to say the least. Fred and his wife eventually come outside to smoke and he walks up and starts talking nonsense (out of her earshot) about he's going to 'try something new tonight'; I assume he's talking out of his ass due to the alcohol and basically ignore what he's saying.
I wander around the rest of the night, out of sorts and he spends the rest of the night with his wife, sitting outside on the patio talking to her. I go to leave when the lights come up and as I'm walking down the street to go to my car, who do I see standing outside about a block away from the club but the two of them, deep in conversation. He calls out, asking if I want to do breakfast with them and I curtly dismiss the offer and proceed to my car. She begins to walk off, and he starts calling out to her; no response.
I get to my car, and they pull up so that he can retrieve his briefcase from my car, and they head off into the night. I say nothing besides 'Good night. You guys be careful.'
I'm done. I can't possibly see hanging out with this cat again if the possibility exists that this shit could happen again. As far as bringing any women that I meet around them (which has often been suggested by both of them) that's NOT gonna happen. I can just see her attempting to fill my prospective mate's head full of the wrong ideas about me. Saboteur!
For the record, there's no sexuality issues to deal with here; he and I are both lovers of the vagoo, through and through, so that's not the point or the problem. Am I out of line for thinking that this was a violation and it needs to be addressed by my buddy or do I just accept the fact that things are never going to be the same? Do you think wifey was out of line for what could be considered 'checking up' on my friend? The word stalker did cross my mind, but that may be a little much.
One more thing... I am almost positive that I overheard her say 'Well, you asked me to come...' when we were sitting outside on the patio, so do you think he planned the whole thing, and if so why? If she had shown up ten minutes later (or earlier for that matter) she would have most likely seen my friend in a very compromising position with one of the many, many lovely young ladies at the club that night.
Your comments, thoughts and opinions are most welcome; try to be constructive and please stay on topic. Thanks...
One of my closest friends and I hadn't hung out in a while due to work and other scheduling issues, so we made plans to hang out and do 'guy stuff' last weekend. I am the last of my friends to still be single and my buddy, whom we'll call Fred has been with his wife for about three years. They met when she was married and he was involved with the mother of one of his kids. Long story short, they fooled around on the side and eventually got married.
So, I arrive at Fred's and learn that his wife is supposed to be going out with her female friends while Fred and I go do our guy's night out. Cool.
After some chit chat and teasing between the two of them (his insecurity was showing through at times) we head out. Now, mind you, Fred and I are close enough that he has confided in me about some dalliances that have occured while he's been with his wife, but I don't judge. We had some pretty wild times together when we were younger and haven't missed out on anything when it comes to women, IMHO.
There we are at the club, having drinks and talking, he's buzzed enough that he starts talking about 'hooking up' with a girl tonite...I must add at this point that this was a majorly target-rich environment and full displays of availability we going on. I've got my best wing-man by my side, and he knows from past experience that I've got his back as well. We've done this before, know the routine, should go down like clock-work. At the very least, we'll practice a little catch-and-release, and have some good memories of a great night together.
We head downstairs and pick out a prime piece of real estate near the door to stake out, complete with a table and a view of the dance floor, restrooms and the patio. We're standing there and talking and out of nowhere his demeanor changes and he makes some off-handed comment about 'Oh yeah, I'm getting some tonight' and starts to smile and looks over my shoulder. I'm thinking he's found a target and I turn around and his wife is standing behind me, drink in hand.
I greet her and then walk off to the restroom, confused and a little (ok, a lot) annoyed...I'm having a serious WTF moment that lasts and lasts and won't go away...I head out onto the patio to get some air and end up discussing the situation with the bartender who agrees with me that it was unusual to say the least. Fred and his wife eventually come outside to smoke and he walks up and starts talking nonsense (out of her earshot) about he's going to 'try something new tonight'; I assume he's talking out of his ass due to the alcohol and basically ignore what he's saying.
I wander around the rest of the night, out of sorts and he spends the rest of the night with his wife, sitting outside on the patio talking to her. I go to leave when the lights come up and as I'm walking down the street to go to my car, who do I see standing outside about a block away from the club but the two of them, deep in conversation. He calls out, asking if I want to do breakfast with them and I curtly dismiss the offer and proceed to my car. She begins to walk off, and he starts calling out to her; no response.
I get to my car, and they pull up so that he can retrieve his briefcase from my car, and they head off into the night. I say nothing besides 'Good night. You guys be careful.'
I'm done. I can't possibly see hanging out with this cat again if the possibility exists that this shit could happen again. As far as bringing any women that I meet around them (which has often been suggested by both of them) that's NOT gonna happen. I can just see her attempting to fill my prospective mate's head full of the wrong ideas about me. Saboteur!
For the record, there's no sexuality issues to deal with here; he and I are both lovers of the vagoo, through and through, so that's not the point or the problem. Am I out of line for thinking that this was a violation and it needs to be addressed by my buddy or do I just accept the fact that things are never going to be the same? Do you think wifey was out of line for what could be considered 'checking up' on my friend? The word stalker did cross my mind, but that may be a little much.
One more thing... I am almost positive that I overheard her say 'Well, you asked me to come...' when we were sitting outside on the patio, so do you think he planned the whole thing, and if so why? If she had shown up ten minutes later (or earlier for that matter) she would have most likely seen my friend in a very compromising position with one of the many, many lovely young ladies at the club that night.
Your comments, thoughts and opinions are most welcome; try to be constructive and please stay on topic. Thanks...
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