another im in love with a straight guy thread (advice plz)

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by palegreenthings, Nov 15, 2007.

  1. palegreenthings

    palegreenthings New Member

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    it started when i met him earlier this year at a party. we randomly started talking and he would flirt by putting his arm around my waist and grabbing my hand to follow where ever he would go. i didnt really think anything of it because he was a tiny bit drunk,i forgot about him. then about a month later at another party he shows up and comes up to me and says my name and i was giddy because he remember me and then hes like "aw you forgot my name" i didnt really though. we spent the rest of the night talking on a couch and he seems really into the conversation, he asks me for my # and we plan to hangout sometime.

    i didnt hear from him for a week or so. we started talking online and we would chat until 4 am.he called me a couple of times really late asking me what i was doing or how i felt, which was a little weird.we also text frequently.he planned on picking me up to go out but he never did,it happened twice actually.when we finally meet up he brings along a female friend.i was kinda hurt cause i thought itd be just me and him also because i was the 3rd wheel basically.we were alone for 20 minutes and we hardly spoke it was actually really awkward.especially because we talk sooo much online/through text.

    i see him 2 other times randomly and we just say hi to eachother and do our own thing.
    hes always really persistent on wanting to see me,and the last time we saw eachother he gave me a gift, completely out of no where which was a sweet gesture.
    hes offered to let me sleep over his house even though we havent seriously hungout more than once.i am not completely masculine manly man.sooo im sure he has some sort of idea that im into him since i do harmless flirting.

    i do know he had a gf before for about 2 yrs or so.

    WHAT SHOULD I DO?
    (sorry if its a long read)
     
  2. Late Knight

    Late Knight New Member

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    If I were you, I would go at the relationship slow, but steady. Follow his lead and if he seems to not know what direction to go just give him a gental nudge in the way you want it to go. You might be surprised, he may just need a little encouragement from you. Being a manly man isn't as important as just being a man. Show him how you care.
     
  3. palegreenthings

    palegreenthings New Member

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    how do you suggest i go about that? i kind of dont want to see him if hes going to bring a friend thats a girl along because i feel horrible.
     
  4. rimmer9

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    You'll have to be patiant. Maybe he's unsure of his feelings or even fighting them, if you try to rush him he may back off completely. You are the only one who knows if it's worth taking it slowly and if things are still the same in a couple of months you can take the risk of asking what he's doing. Just don't invest everything in this in case it doesn't work out.
     
  5. Principessa

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  6. rimmer9

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    Good reply nj
     
  7. palegreenthings

    palegreenthings New Member

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    yeah thats what i was thinking but he is so hot/cold.the times ive seen him weve just been around eachother and hardly talked.but other wise its completely different,im so confuuused.in a couple of months he might move to another state.
     
  8. Principessa

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    Thank you, but I just calls em like I sees em. :smile:
     
  9. palegreenthings

    palegreenthings New Member

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  10. Late Knight

    Late Knight New Member

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    You'll never know if you don't go after him.
     
  11. palegreenthings

    palegreenthings New Member

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    obv,i just want to get other peoples ideas before i rush into anything and get my heart broken.
     
  12. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    how do you know that he's straight?

    Try to put some feelers out there about how he feels about bisexuality or homosexuality. Maybe he's not as straight as you think. If he is, don't push it, move on.
     
  13. sdbg

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    L.M.A.O. Good one!

    Hey Palegreenthings:

    I've had this come up repeatedly in life where I have crushes on straight guys. Here is what my experience has been.

    The first time it happened, we were lovers for 6 years. Then he married, had 3 kids, and divorced. Ironically, our paths crossed years later after he recently married for a second time. He has expressed an interest in fooling around, but I want more than to be someones action on the side. No, we'll just be friends. I like his wife and wouldn't get involved with her man regardless of our past.

    The next time, I was 40; he was 21. We were best friends. It felt like history repeating itself. I became obsessed with him. Talk about a fatal attraction. I hid it from him, though. After a few years, he left San Diego and we stayed in touch. I caused myself a lot of pain and heartache through the years chasing after someone who I knew just wanted to be my friend. After 15 years of stuffing my feelings inside, I saw Brokeback Mountain in April '06. My friend was now 36; I was 55. He invited me to come visit in WA in June '06. I got the courage to be honest and tell him candidly about the past when he lived in San Diego. He said that he kinda thought that I was sweet on him back then, but never really knew because I wouldn't talk about it. I made it perfectly clear that I wasn't hitting on him - I just wanted to let him know how I valued him as a friend. The vacation went fine, or so I thought. When I got home from Seattle, he e-mailed me and said "I can't help but feel that we're moving in different directions." I never heard from him again. My honest opinion is that he's a closet case and I'm the catalyst. Oh well! On to the next guy. Maybe I'll have better luck next time!

    For me the moral of the story is: Don't waste your time getting hung up on straight guys. I like the butch, macho, jock type, but ofen they are emotionally and sexually unavailable. Good luck Palegreenthings.
     
  14. palegreenthings

    palegreenthings New Member

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    hm he had a girlfriend for 2 years or something.he also mentions how hot so and so is...
    then again it can just be an act.
     
  15. dreamer20

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    And Don't forget the lube!:wink:

    YouTube - Batlube





     
  16. B_Monster

    B_Monster New Member

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    Holy Buttfuck Robin!!
     
  17. B_RedDude

    B_RedDude New Member

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    Your bud is ambivalent, but definitely not 100% straight -- how many 100% straight guys put their arm around another guy's waist and lead him around by the hand at a party?

    I'd take him up on the sleepover offer. Try to overcome your reluctance and inhibition; I think they are blinding you to the reality of this situation (I wouldn't want to get my heart broken either, but at least if you stay over, you'll probably know either way.

    I've been in a bit of a similar situation at work over the past three months and I know how difficult and painful this can be.
     
  18. Principessa

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  19. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    Or maybe he's bi.
     
  20. prince_will

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    exactly. has he ever given you that impression?
     
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