Anxiety

[Chilldan]

Hey Guys,

Through lockdown and out the other side I’ve been more anxious than I have been for a long time. One night I couldn’t get hard without some help and it scared me. I’ve spoken to my wife about it and she a)didn’t think anything if it b) has been really supportive when she found out how worried I have become about it. I know we all have bad nights, but the anxiety I have felt has amplified this and now it’s not getting hard like it would do before. Every time requires some stimulation (which is actually fun) but I still feel like my body is letting me down a little. I spoke to my gp and they prescribed viagra. I haven’t tried it yet though I feel better knowing it’s there and we ordered some sex toys to Change the focus at the start of sex which has helped too.
Really what I’m hoping for is that I’m not the only one out there with a case of performance anxiety and that there are other guys still in healthy relationships who just need a jumpstart in the dick department every know and then. The doc said it was normal for someone in their mid thirties with a stressful life / family etc but I would appreciate hearing from any of you.

Thanks Guys.

 

[bbybrr]

I’m about to turn 30 and this has happened to me before. When my anxiety is at its peak I have trouble having interest in anything sexual. I struggled to get hard and stay hard. Anxiety is usually linked with depression and depression is a major boner killer lol literally it effects how horny you get. I was so worried when this happened! There were nights when I would try to jerk off to try to convince myself it was all in my head. And it was. This lasted throughout quarantine. I’ve noticed that once I took care of my mental health first it’s got better. I went on antidepressants and started exercising and doing things that would boost my confidence. And along with that I was able to get hard and stay hard and continue to have a happy healthy sex life.

 

[japetty]

If you watch the news on any channel stop watching it. The news today is nothing but depressing. I stopped watching the news several weeks ago and my health seems better for it. My son who stopped watching news channels several days ago at his wifes suggestion and he is a much different person when we see him. My wife and I watch different TV's and I hear her yelling at the TV all the time. I go into the family room pick up her remote and turn her TV off, then I catch hell of coarse but when she turns it back on she watches something else, like old cowboy reruns she has watched a dozen times. I told her one time to sit down and take her blood pressure, she found out it was up by a large margin and she is already on 2 type of blood pressure medication. The yelling still happens from time to time but not near as often as it was and getting less. News on any channel today is nothing but large dozes of depression for most people. Good luck with curing your anxiety.

 

[cockydude2018]

I, too, would recommend limiting exposure to the constant bad news. I wouldn't ban it completely from your life because you need to keep informed.

Depression and anxiety is rampant everywhere, so you are not alone. And great boner killers they are!

You have viagra now, so why not give it a go? It's not addictive, so you have nothing to lose. It might just boost your "spirits"!

 

[Chilldan]

Thanks guys,

Will definitely stop reading the news. I’ve got back into running and started taking care of myself. It was too easy to just stop everything during lockdown, but you’re right it’s good to do something for me to manage the anxiety.

I just felt so alone, to start with I didn’t feel like I could even talk to my wife about it, but now having done that I feel better and then I spoke to a mate and that helped again (though it had never happened to him).

I had really convinced myself that I was a failure or not manly enough or whatever, but it is really good to hear that someone else had got stuck in their anxiety / depression too and that it doesn’t last forever.

It has also been a real positive in some respects - we’ve been able to have some really honest conversations about what we both want or need in bed. We ordered some vibrators, some lube, a butt plug etc to try which may not have happened other wise and it turns out she thinks it’s hot to see me jerk it hard. So there are some silver linings too.

Thank you guys for making me feel normal and not alone.

 

[japetty]

Thanks guys,

Will definitely stop reading the news. I’ve got back into running and started taking care of myself. It was too easy to just stop everything during lockdown, but you’re right it’s good to do something for me to manage the anxiety.

I just felt so alone, to start with I didn’t feel like I could even talk to my wife about it, but now having done that I feel better and then I spoke to a mate and that helped again (though it had never happened to him).

I had really convinced myself that I was a failure or not manly enough or whatever, but it is really good to hear that someone else had got stuck in their anxiety / depression too and that it doesn’t last forever.

It has also been a real positive in some respects - we’ve been able to have some really honest conversations about what we both want or need in bed. We ordered some vibrators, some lube, a butt plug etc to try which may not have happened other wise and it turns out she thinks it’s hot to see me jerk it hard. So there are some silver linings too.

Thank you guys for making me feel normal and not alone.

Sounds like you are doing what you think you need to do for yourself and that is important to you. I don't think you will be sorry one bit for that. You should see progress soon I feel.

 

[deleted814719]

If you watch the news on any channel stop watching it. The news today is nothing but depressing. I stopped watching the news several weeks ago and my health seems better for it. My son who stopped watching news channels several days ago at his wifes suggestion and he is a much different person when we see him. My wife and I watch different TV's and I hear her yelling at the TV all the time. I go into the family room pick up her remote and turn her TV off, then I catch hell of coarse but when she turns it back on she watches something else, like old cowboy reruns she has watched a dozen times. I told her one time to sit down and take her blood pressure, she found out it was up by a large margin and she is already on 2 type of blood pressure medication. The yelling still happens from time to time but not near as often as it was and getting less. News on any channel today is nothing but large dozes of depression for most people. Good luck with curing your anxiety.

"... stop watching it". BINGO! While COVID-19 may indeed be horrible for older people and those with underlying health conditions, the VAST majority of individuals who become infected will recover and be just fine. The daily news is filled with sob stories (I don't mean to make light of those who died or became seriously ill) of this-or-that individual who was "healthy" and then suffered some long hospital stay or even died as a result of COVID-19. The news is NEVER about the millions of people who got the virus and recovered.

This isn't the Black Death of the 1300s which may have killed 70 million humans or more. We don't have volunteers roaming the streets with carts shouting, "bring out your dead".

The problems with this virus are man-made. Here in the States, politicians have crushed our economy by shutting businesses down. Bars, restaurants, beaches, churches, wedding receptions, etc. have all been seriously reduced in business operations, closed, opened and then closed again. Much of this is in an effort to defeat President Trump in November and NOT about "protecting" citizens. Hell, if it was just about protecting people, we would have quarantined the elderly and those with underlying health conditions and let everyone else go on with their lives. Instead, governors, mayors, etc. locked down the economy by mandating that everyone shelter in place, not go out, etc.

Yes, infections seem to be rising in the States but you have to ask why? Because people are going out again and returning somewhat to "normal"? Well, there was a strong lockdown effort for several months. That obviously didn't work in terms of eliminating the virus which seems impossible. China, S Korea, Japan are all announcing new outbreaks or cases. So, IMO, we need to live with this thing until such time as there's a vaccine or pharmaceuticals for early treatment.

My remedy for all of this depressing, non-stop carping about COVID-19 is to ignore it, protect yourself and your family as best you can, and do the things that you enjoy (exercise, gaming, reading, etc.). Take stock of the good things in your life and find pleasure and happiness in the small things.

 

[japetty]

"... stop watching it". BINGO! While COVID-19 may indeed be horrible for older people and those with underlying health conditions, the VAST majority of individuals who become infected will recover and be just fine. The daily news is filled with sob stories (I don't mean to make light of those who died or became seriously ill) of this-or-that individual who was "healthy" and then suffered some long hospital stay or even died as a result of COVID-19. The news is NEVER about the millions of people who got the virus and recovered.

This isn't the Black Death of the 1300s which may have killed 70 million humans or more. We don't have volunteers roaming the streets with carts shouting, "bring out your dead".

The problems with this virus are man-made. Here in the States, politicians have crushed our economy by shutting businesses down. Bars, restaurants, beaches, churches, wedding receptions, etc. have all been seriously reduced in business operations, closed, opened and then closed again. Much of this is in an effort to defeat President Trump in November and NOT about "protecting" citizens. Hell, if it was just about protecting people, we would have quarantined the elderly and those with underlying health conditions and let everyone else go on with their lives. Instead, governors, mayors, etc. locked down the economy by mandating that everyone shelter in place, not go out, etc.

Yes, infections seem to be rising in the States but you have to ask why? Because people are going out again and returning somewhat to "normal"? Well, there was a strong lockdown effort for several months. That obviously didn't work in terms of eliminating the virus which seems impossible. China, S Korea, Japan are all announcing new outbreaks or cases. So, IMO, we need to live with this thing until such time as there's a vaccine or pharmaceuticals for early treatment.

My remedy for all of this depressing, non-stop carping about COVID-19 is to ignore it, protect yourself and your family as best you can, and do the things that you enjoy (exercise, gaming, reading, etc.). Take stock of the good things in your life and find pleasure and happiness in the small things.

One issue is that people go out and many refuse to do what health authorities advise us to do. I know I hate to wear that damn mask but I wear the damn thing. I do the social distancing as I am told but I do find myself going out less and less because of the added precautions I have to take.

I do see and hear the people going on more about the Covid-19 more so than the problem it really is presenting. I don't even fell there should have been a world wide shut down but with so little known about this by the rest of the world other than China, we really had little choice and now that we have learned about it a bit we are learning how to live with the Covid-19 as we live with other Viruses that are going around.

I don't feel Covid-19 will be the last infection type illness sent around the world that nothing is known about by most in medical science.

We will get through this and it will pass but there will be something new come along I am sure. Just as Covid-19 came along as a bit of a surprise to the civilized world as we know it. IMHO YMMV

 

[someperson]

"...
This isn't the Black Death of the 1300s which may have killed 70 million humans or more. We don't have volunteers roaming the streets with carts shouting, "bring out your dead".

that is because they're using refrigerated trucks trailers

I don't feel Covid-19 will be the last infection type illness sent around the world that nothing is known about by most in medical science.

We will get through this and it will pass but there will be something new come along I am sure. Just as Covid-19 came along as a bit of a surprise to the civilized world as we know it. IMHO YMMV

Everyone forgot about the previous modern version aka Spanish flu 1918 they should always have been prepared and rotate stock as necessary to keep stuff fresh

 

[DiamondJoe]

If you watch the news on any channel stop watching it. The news today is nothing but depressing. I stopped watching the news several weeks ago and my health seems better for it. My son who stopped watching news channels several days ago at his wifes suggestion and he is a much different person when we see him. My wife and I watch different TV's and I hear her yelling at the TV all the time. I go into the family room pick up her remote and turn her TV off, then I catch hell of coarse but when she turns it back on she watches something else, like old cowboy reruns she has watched a dozen times. I told her one time to sit down and take her blood pressure, she found out it was up by a large margin and she is already on 2 type of blood pressure medication. The yelling still happens from time to time but not near as often as it was and getting less. News on any channel today is nothing but large dozes of depression for most people. Good luck with curing your anxiety.

I'm not entirely sure that ignorance is bliss.

Certainly choose your news and keep it in a set place.

So, for instance, at the start of Covid I would look at my phone first thing in the morning, scroll through terrible stories and gorge on 100 shades of misery throughout the day. That wasn't helpful.

Now I get the headlines at 12 noon and wait until 5pm when there's an hour-long radio/drive time news programme that is measured (they've had most of the day to think about what's important) and non-hysterical.

I get the news but it's not overwhelming. I control it.

 

[longstroke7]

I love how a thread about male anxiety and how it hinders sexual desire turns into a political shit hole for a Trump cultist to spread his fucking nonsense. I was going to contribute because I have experience dealing with these issues but fuck it.