I learned to orgasm in this order: from a vibrator, then from manual stimulation, then from oral and I'm still working on from penetration. Each way had a bit of a learning curve. I just kept at it 'till I got it (oh, the horror of pleasuring myself for hours until I came lol). It helped while I was figuring it out to use porn or fantasize a lot until I was extremely horny: seemed to happen quicker that way. It also helped to fantasize even while I was with my partner, just to keep the "wow, he's been down there awhile, is he bored, am I taking too long etc." thoughts from popping up.