Any ladies never had an orgasm or had trouble the first time?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by williewanker, Aug 26, 2009.

  1. williewanker

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    My girlfriend had never climaxed, and I really want her to (probably more than she does, lol). Not with herself, or with me. I'm the only guy she's been with, and vice versa, so it's hard to tell if I'm doing something wrong, or it's just the way she is. We've done the works - penetration, oral, fingering. Sometimes she feels like she's close (she thinks) and sometimes she makes me stop when I go down on her because she feels like peeing. I feel so bad not being able to give her this experience because she gives me so much. She doesn't complain about it but that does little to put me at ease. Any help from the ladies who once had similar troubles but now know what to do would be GREATLY appreciated. I know every girl is different, but the problem is that she herself does not know, so I'm turning to you :)
     
  2. StraightCock4Her

    StraightCock4Her New Member

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    Feeling like she is going to pee is actually a sign of the best orgasm of her life coming up on her. You shouldn't stop nor should she try to hold it in. Tell her to relax and just let it happen. It's called squirting and she's a lucky lady if she can do it. So, let her squirt all over you and she'll have had her first and probably the best orgasm she can ever have.

    You both are rather lucky if you can help her let it out.
     
  3. williewanker

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    Thanks, I have read about that and mentioned it her, but I think she's a bit self-conscious. Is this always a sign of a squirting orgasm, or could it be a "regular" one? I think she'd be a bit embarrased at first, although I would love it. Maybe she just needs to relax and be more at ease.

    Still looking for other tips!
     
  4. psidom

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    it is natural to feel the need to have to pee when having sex as a woman,
    from my experience with girls and women.

    the neural pathways that enjoy food are the same ones that
    open the orgasmic window....god that was good.

    she is SOOOO hungry she has lost her appetite to her anxiousness,so she is trying to forcefeed herself and it makes it difficult like trying to fall asleep when you know you have to leave in 3 hours....anxiety.

    you both need to slow down and decide first off that you are
    100% together and not just fucking,the intimacy of orgasming is
    kind of embarrassing for a woman. (they do not want to "lose" control)

    maybe get her some toys that are smaller than you,
    get her to come off of them whilst watching you squeeze your cock
    to a feverish pitch...when you come to her you may be in for a surprise.

    also try to lose all of your ego when you kiss,or say something you mean.
    you will both feel far more sexual charge if you keep it real.
     
  5. williewanker

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    We are deeply in love and shared a few awkward moments in
    bed and laughed it off. I believe she is comfortable with me, just that feeling of peeing bugs her and puts her off. I'll keep encouraging her to just let it pass. Any ideas why she can't orgasm even when she masturbates alone?
     
  6. psidom

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    try a small $10 inflatable kiddie pool....fuck in it,
    she may feel less inhibited.:wink:

    it worked for me.
     
  7. williewanker

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    Lol, I may just have to give that a shot!
     
  8. psidom

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    you had asked, Any ideas why she can't orgasm even when she masturbates alone?

    i have no clue,i don't know her,my guess...
    most likely anxiety a whole differnent branch though,
    this one is with how she is anxious with how she relates to herself,
    know thyself.

    it is very primal to bring yourself to orgasm,
    we spend our lives cutting that part out...trying to remove it
    because it gets in the way,until we are out of school and want to play.

    by this time our neural pathways are re-arranged to fit in society,
    without flirting with the idea of fucking everyone we see...which is immoral.

    we live in a civilised moral society...that is why she cannot cum.
    she has to find her inner immoral minx...for you as a couple.

    one part of her is a badass,she has to set it free,to truly orgasm.
    but she also needs to bridle it so she does not go paris hilton.

    cumming is in the mind more than the body,
    it is like a harmonic on a guitar,
    the seperation of physical and psycho-sexual
    play in harmony with each other,bringing a canvas
    to paint the orgasm on.

    think in color and sound and try to really fathom that thinking
    is beyond "logic" but also sensation.

    sensation is instant thought...from kisses to punches,something is conveyed.

    get her to hear what orange sounds like,
    get her to taste the color blue,
    kiss her in rasberry rain,
    and lick the juices off of her symphonic lips. ;)

    think different,cumming is not logical,but moreso chaotic and nonsense.:smile:
     
    #8 psidom, Aug 27, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2009
  9. williewanker

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    Very poetic and useful advice! I guess it will just take time and hopefully one say it will just happen. She is not at all reserved in bed though, she likes dirty talk, rough play etc. So I'm not sure if it's an inner conflict.
     
  10. lickme69

    lickme69 New Member

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    Just a thought but there are women out there that can only orgasm from clitoral stimulation only. Try just focusing on that.
     
  11. clitina

    clitina New Member

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    WOW! My strongest, long lasting orgasms are on horseback with my English jumping saddle. I probably could eventually pass out from such a feeling...
     
  12. dolfette

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    do it on a stack of towels.
    a wash cloth & warm water to hand.
    if it were me, i'd be freaking about the mess.
    obvious provisions for an easy clean up might help.
     
  13. 7x6

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    For the most unorgasmic (anorgamic?) women I've been with the most reliable way of making them cum was clit sucking combined with rough tongue rubbing and a couple of fingers pushing on the G-spot at the same time. One of them had never cum other than on her own and the other hadn't cum for the four years she'd been on her medication.

    The trick is to take your time, forget the fingers at first and spend a long time using just your mouth, maybe with your hands caressing her body to help gauge the shudders that tell you when you are doing it right. When you have a feel of what works, add the fingers and really get them pushing up on that g-spot, maybe moving very fast. With my ex wife I initially suffered all sorts of cramps and a sore tongue but it got easier with time.

    Some women of course require a much gentler touch but in my limited experience, they aren't the ones who find it hard to cum. With my current girlfriend for example my hard won oral skills for giving 'any woman' an orgasm were useless. I found it hard to adapt to being gentle enough for her not to find my oral "too rough and distracting" but that's less of a big deal as she cums after five minutes of fucking anyway...

    Sorry if this all sounds a bit clinical but it works for me.

    To be honest I Sometimes I miss the challenge (and subsequent sense of pride) of giving a woman who finds it hard a huge shuddering orgasm.
     
  14. williewanker

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    Clinical is good, thanks a lot - I need all the tips I can get. I like the idea of using the hands to gauge her reaction, forgive my inexperience. I think I need to do it more often and find her spots, we haven't done it too much because she honestly seems to prefer giving me a blowjob than me going down on her. As you can probably tell, she's a very giving lover, and all I want to do is to be able to reciprocate that fully.
     
  15. Ramsey

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    I love to spend my attention on a woman and doing lots of stuff to her and with her-but I would reeeeaaaaallly like to be with a woman that can come easier.
     
  16. silvergirl

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    i mentioned to this fella i had a 1 night stand with that i'd never met a guy who cud make me cum... n i think he took this as a challenge and was quite rough with me with his fingers... n ended up bruising me with the fingers that weren't in me that were hitting me... :/ i masturbate and can cum from my clit but i still haven't worked myself out penis wise... i can last for hrs... the closest ive came to cumming is once with the biggest penis i've had but he had played a game of soccer that night so he was lacking stamina... i'd hate to put it down to penis size... cud that be it? any thoughts? comments? advice??
     
  17. dolfette

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    yeah, next time tell the guy to fuck off.
    that's no way to treat a new vagina.
     
  18. psidom

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    for some i am sure it does come down to cocksize,but not because
    of it's size but moreso because of it's effects on your mind.

    maybe it is the "naughty" what would my mother think,that pushes
    you over the edge?

    maybe it is just physical i do not know,

    i doubt that simply because women can come hard from 5 inchers,
    if their mind is in it.

    it may not be as easy to...but they can and would if that was all there was.
     
  19. psidom

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    i agree...he sounded like he had something to prove,(scary antisocial)
    i would have punched him if i was you,really fucking hard,
    and then said fuck off.:wink:
     
  20. silvergirl

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    haha hmmm maybe... so ur saying u dont think my mind is in it???

    i don't think its naughtiness tho cos i've had 3somes n 4somes with all guys :p
     
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