Any of you younger guys involved with friends?

[13788]

sammygirly: [quote author=Ineligible link=board=youth;num=1055913166;start=20#33 date=06/20/03 at 20:12:09]Here's my take on it:

I think deep in the brain, we are probably all bi. Further up, some feelings get suppressed, but which ones, and how efficiently, varies. [/quote]

I totally agree Ineligible and have said it before. What bothers me about this post, and as a bisexual woman, I've experienced galore - is society's need to force you into a pigeon hole. You are not allowed to be both, but must be one or the other.

Interesting isn't it that even those that champion ONE cause, and express concerns for labels within their OWN sexuality - can be the same people who jump in and label someone?

Experimentation at a young age is not only common, it should be applauded. Will his peers applaud? Maybe not - teens are evil as Dee so eloquently pointed out...but if it so turns out that he IS gay, Do we, DMW, WANT him to hide? That seems against what we're trying to do here as a new and more educated society. If it turns out he's straight, do we WANT him to be ashamed of experimenting? Again, doesn't seem to fit our current goals of sexual freedom and openess.

Why do we perpetuate the need to be ashamed for our sexual actions?

Answer the question: How do you ask if you want to test without getting your ass kicked?

Not: Am I gay?

...and bravo to you gentlemen who saw his question for what it was - as well as why he might react defensively.

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

If you people want me to apologise to the little dude, I will. My mention of ass piracy was really not meant as an insult. Thinking about it now, I realise that by a 13 year old it must be taken as such. Hell, I'm an ass pirate; I use the term to describe myself. As for "it sounds pretty gay to me," well, I'm sorry, but it still does. When a dude asks, "Can I suck your cock?" the first thing that pops into my head is not, "He must be straight." I'm strange that way, I suppose. Listen ... Josh can suck his buddies off all he wants, and I'm not going to suggest that needs to label himslf. On the contrary, his buddies will do it for him. I'm sorry that I, a total stranger, bruised his fragile psyche by suggesting that he might be gay; much better that he's viewed as a faggot by people who see him every day and can treat him like a leper, I guess. I'm probably banging my head against a wall, because this post will undoubtedly be interpreted as an attack by some. My only suggestion to Josh is if you feel you must come on to your friends while you're 13, be aware of the consequences; they'll follow you around for a while. If you still think it's worth it, that's fine. Regardless of your sexuality, the decision is yours.

 

[13788]

sammygirly: [quote author=DoubleMeatWhopper link=board=youth;num=1055913166;start=40#41 date=06/22/03 at 13:13:20] My only suggestion to Josh is if you feel you must come on to your friends while you're 13, be aware of the consequences; they'll follow you around for a while. If you still think it's worth it, that's fine. Regardless of your sexuality, the decision is yours. [/quote]

Now THAT is good advice

 

[13788]

Longhornjok: DMW, the issue I took with your initial response was that it did not allow for the possibility that SmallStuff was anything other than gay, simply by virtue of the fact that he asked how anyone here had gone about exploring with their friends at his age. Based on the dripping sarcasm in your last post, perhaps I was wrong in believing you didn't mean to ignore the notion of the Kinsey scale, in which case we simply disagree on this one.

 

[B_black10inches]

I'm 19. I'm not sure what you mean by "involved". I like to jerk off with a few friends of mine watching porn. I like watching how hard their dicks get & how hard mine gets, & I get off on watching each of us bust a nut. I think it's real sexy doing that. But I'm not really interested in sucking their dicks or something. I think big hard dicks are sexy as shyt. And it's horny when you & your friends are having so much pleasure together. It's something you can all realte to. Does this make any sense? I bust bigger nuts when I jerkoff with my bros.

 

[smokeylink]

When we're talking teens, there could be a few reasons they would experiment with sexual matters together. This site is about size and I can tell you that the biggest reason I jacked (and did other things) with my friends was to compare or atleast see the sizes of the other guys. I was always (and still am) pretty focused on size issues. So, in my opinion, gay or not, boys will be boys.

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

So lay off the labelling people...... let the kid work it out for himself when he's ready... if he says he's not gay, then who the f**k are all of you to dictate to him that he most definitely IS gay.... I think he should know more than the rest of you

This of course is an absurdity. No subject is as bedeviled by self-deception and confusion as the issue of one's own sexuality.

And spinifex, I think your distinction between gay and homosexual is quite, quite spurious. Sucking another guy's dick is gay and homosexual, because those adjectives still mean the same thing.

A basically straight guy in prison who seeks solace with another prisoner is doing a homosexual thing, or a gay thing ... same diff.

If, for all that, he remains not basically gay, then he's not basically homosexual, either ... because the terms remain pretty much synonomous.

If you think we should lay off labelling others, I agree. But that's simply because sexual matters involving other people -- not, of course, our partners -- is in principle none of our business.

 

[kurios]

Spinifex---One of the most brilliant definitions I've read.

All those guys who start a story with Im not gay but my buddy and I fooled around..blah blah mighten need to preface the story and erase the wonder also if the interaction made them gay

 

[Stormyjjl]

Ok Well Guys I don't think its a big deal if you are Str8 and you want to "Mess around" with your guy friends. What would deem you not Str8 is if you love as them more than a friend or if you feel and emotional connection with them. Ask yourself "can i sepnd the rest of my life with a dude?" Being Gay is not just "same-sex Sex" being gay is the same as being Str8 the only differnce is a few parts.

 

[Magic 8]

Being Gay/Homosexual is having feelings for another male like a straight man would have for a woman. As for sex, sex is sex. The word "sex" describes an act, not a life style. If it's between a man and a woman then it's heterosexual sex. If it is betwen two males, then it is homosexual sex. If it is betweeeen two women then it is lesbian sex.

To answer the original question, yes I have foled around with friends and some of them have turned out to be straight. Sexual exploration betwen teenage boys is, in most cases, done too early in their life for them to know if they are gay or straight. It's a phase that most young men go through during the course of puberty.

 

[mnrocko]

Ok Well Guys I don't think its a big deal if you are Str8 and you want to "Mess around" with your guy friends. What would deem you not Str8 is if you love as them more than a friend or if you feel and emotional connection with them. Ask yourself "can i sepnd the rest of my life with a dude?" Being Gay is not just "same-sex Sex" being gay is the same as being Str8 the only differnce is a few parts.

Exactly. Most young boys/men fool around when coming of age. Its natural. Its curiosity. If you develop emotional ties then it becomes more then just sex.
Where I grew up people did not talk about sex, I was having sex with guys and girls and thought everyone else was doing the same. later I gravitated just to men.
I would say 90% of the guys I knew growing up fooled around with each other or had community j/off sessions. It was curiosity.

 

[SammyQ]

^agreed. a TON of guys in high school experimented together. Most was just jacking off. I know of a few who sucked penis and what not and just didn't really like it too much. The only thing i did in high school was make out with like 3 guys with just boxerbriefs on but i knew because of that that i was straight. (not to mention i had some drinks in me) When it comes to jacking off, i never did that with another guy, something i like to do alone.