Anyone else dislike Queens, Nelly, or femme men?

[controlppt]

I think someone just forgot that it was a drag queen who threw the first stone in Stonewall Riot

 

[Alexanddan]

i personally dislike it, and i'm mostly gay. i think that if i like a guy, i like a guy not some woman/man

 

[OCMuscleJock]

I never post, but this thread has prompted me to do so for the first time. You have a right to your opinion, but I think you're a bit off-base.

Gay men are human beings, and every human being fits somewhere on the spectrum of masculine and feminine regardless of gender. There are a lot of gay men who are feminine because that's the way they are. The majority of little boys who are teased and called faggots by other kids because they have feminine tendencies aren't putting anything on. It's just the way they are, and they shouldn't have to change who they are because it doesn't fit another persons' ideal.

Sure, there are gay men who may camp it up with friends, or even fall into a pattern of campy behavior most of the time, but is this any different than "masculine" men who say "Bro!" all the time, puff out there chests, take on the traits of whatever "cool guy" persona Hollywood has decided is the new masculine standard, and act in any hyper-masculine way. Both come from insecurity and/or a need to take on a posture to communicate to others their feelings of self-identity and both can be equally annoying depending on one's value systems.

I've had this conversation with other gay guys who feel like you guys do, and I've always suspected that their hatred (because that's what it is) comes from an insecurity in their own sexuality and experiences with a few shitty people who happened to be "nelly or queenie". If some flamboyant, effeminate gay men treated you poorly, those individuals were assholes, but generalizing a whole group of people because of your limited experiences is wrong. The degree to which a person is feminine or masculine has nothing to do with their morals or how they treat others.

Lots of drag queens and effeminate men were the ones who fought for the limited rights we gay men now have. They were the ones who took care of their sick friends -- many of whom were as butch and masculine as anyone else -- in the height of the AIDS crisis, and maybe acting a little outlandishly helped them cope with the horror that was around them. Maybe some of them use it as a shield to protect themselves from getting hurt, using wit and sarcasm because they have no other weapons. Who knows, and honestly, who cares? But being effeminate doesn't equate to the list of negative personality traits you mentioned... And intimating that if all gay men were "straight-acting" those people who hate us and find us offensive would be more accepting is ludicrous and naive, at best.

I found your posts ignorant, uninformed, and offensive to gay men and women, and the fact that you find the need to qualify your opinions at such length and defend them so strongly, without prompting, are suspect. You don't like effeminate men. That's cool. We all have preferences. And we're all lucky that we live in a country where we have the right to air our opinions. But spitting out all that ugliness is hurtful, cowardly, and unnecessary.

*applause* you said all that needed to be said good job!

 

[OCMuscleJock]

And for those gay porn lovers... one of the best and most famous directors in the porn industry...gay or strait is Chi Chi LaRue....That man is an Amazing person...not because what he does...but more so how he made himself into a name even straight people recognize and yet is a cool person to know. Drag is nothing more to some as an Alter ego..or even a means to entertain...

 

[B_theOtherJJ]

Some of the most MASCULINE looking men are big QUEENS in reality. They open their mouths, and a purse flies out. Or when you get them home, they flop belly down on the bed with butt in the air. So, are we talking looks here, or personality ??? Could you tolerate a "nelly" guy if he was 110% BUTCH looking ????

Its funny, when people refer to "fem" gay men they always preface it by saying "oh, they are so funny, or fun to be with". Thats like when you see a "fat" girl, you say "doesnt she have a pretty face though?"

Although it will never happen in our lifetime, we should try to do away with "labels".
Its all about chemistry, attraction and personal taste. Y ou either like a person or you dont. But we shouldnt make generalizations, because there are alwasy exceptions to the rule.

 

[Catchoftheday]

Most gay and bisexual men are not flaming queens at all.



viscous and vindictive.

banned within 5 hours of posting this.

yay mods!!

:biggrin1:

 

[alpinepaul]

LilNubi: Thx for your words.

 

[invisibleman]

I like nelly masculine men. That shit is hot. With the right balance.:wink:

You could learn a lot from nelly men. Like mixed martial arts. Or covert intelligence.

 

[houtx48]

i get the feeling that golf took red's ass to the wood shed and red was to dumb to know it.

 

[798686]

I have also seen first hand that those drag queen types are pretty viscous and vindictive.

They're viscous? That's not good, hehehe.

 

[D_Relentless Original]

Some of the most MASCULINE looking men are big QUEENS in reality. They open their mouths, and a purse flies out. Or when you get them home, they flop belly down on the bed with butt in the air. So, are we talking looks here, or personality ??? Could you tolerate a "nelly" guy if he was 110% BUTCH looking ????

Its funny, when people refer to "fem" gay men they always preface it by saying "oh, they are so funny, or fun to be with". Thats like when you see a "fat" girl, you say "doesnt she have a pretty face though?"

Although it will never happen in our lifetime, we should try to do away with "labels".
Its all about chemistry, attraction and personal taste. Y ou either like a person or you dont. But we shouldnt make generalizations, because there are alwasy exceptions to the rule.

I loved this post, never, ever have i heard the expression open their mouths and a purse flies out hehe, so funny :biggrin1:

 

[340120]

Queens or femme men also are the cause of homophobia among straight people. Most straights I know do not care for queens or femme men either and understand that only a few gay men are actually flaming queens or a bad stereotype that's a total act that they put on since they are attention whores.

I avoid queens and femme men since I don't like to be around them, date them, andthey are a total turn off and do not do anything for me sexually.

Most gay and bisexual men are not flaming queens at all and they are just normal masculine men who happen to be gay or bisexual.

I find femme men or queens to be really bad insulting stereotypes and when I see how the media (TV and movies) portrays gay men as being queens and the brunt of homophobic jokes with the queen or sissy character.

In TV shows it's just as bad with characters like Jack from Will and Grace or the guys from Queer Eye.

I understand how how black people must feel when they see mostly all black people in the media as being thugs, Niggas, or into the whole hip hop/gangsta attitude/fashion. Or how Margaret Cho must have felt when they made her do that corny Asian American sitcom in
the 90s called All American Girl that was full of bad Asian stereotypes and then they had the gall to tell her that her character was not "Asian enough" even though she was just being funny and being herself and not a total Asian stereotype.

I happen to be gay but when people first meet me they do not assume this about me and some do not believe me when I come out to them until I tell them I have a partner.I do not like it when guys say that they are straight acting when they are bisexual or gay, if they were really straight acting they would not be having or wanting sex with men in the first place.

Why is there even a link between being bisexual and gay and feminine?

It makes no sense at all and gay sex is anything but being feminine even if you are into being passive or the receptive person for anal sex or just are into giving oral sex.

I agree that being a queen or femme is just a fake act that guys put on because they think that they have to act this way because they are bisexual or gay, and that queens embody all of the bad stereotypes of gay men.

I remember in the 80s when being femme/androgynous was all the fashion and very popular among gay men, think Boy George and New Wave fashion.

I'm glad I never faked being a queen, and nowadays masculine men are in and thankfully people realize that not everyone that is bi/gay doesn't act like Jack from the TV show Will and Grace and that we're normal people just like straight people.

I do happen to know that even straight people do get turned off by flaming queens and many find them annoying.

I also do not like the queens on TV shows like Queer Eye and my friends out west met Carson the blonde guy from the Queer Eye when he was at some club doing a promotion, and even with him being a flaming queen is apparently all an act and that they expect him to act this way on TV since he is gay.

The worst are the guys that are into the total fake femme act and they look all hot with muscles and then they open their mouth and rolls of chiffon fall out! LMAO who do they think that they're fooling?

I agree that flaming queens can be a lot worse than some women (the type who are vapid, materialistic, and bitchy) are at being full of bitter gall and vile and passive/aggressive mind games, petty DRAMA and all of that. Just look at how bad some women are when it comes to using their bodies, sex appeal, and pussy for power or their own personal gain! Or the whole "I want things MY WAY!" attitude that most women seem to have especially when it comes to a wedding/family.

If you don't believe me on that one just pick up any issue of Cosmo/glamour/any women's magazine, look at ads where women are in, watch sex in the city or any other TV show, try being friends with a guy who is going to marry a materialistic woman, or just talk to most men who are in relationships with vapid, materialistic, bitchy women and you'll find out that it's true!

I feel bad for my straight male friends who are married to women who don't put out at all or who don't even like sex or want it most of the time and they have told me how women do the above, but then again I do think that some men like this and enjoy being submissive in a relationship with a woman.

Before you think that I am a misogynist, I'm not. I did not say that all women are this way, just the ones who are vapid, bitchy, and highly materialistic usually are.

If you need proof about flaming queens being just as bad as bitchy vapid materialistic women are this try hanging out with some queens, go on a gay message board and see how queens online act to each other and start petty drama and BS over the latest female pop singer, read some books by the shitty author Augusten Burroughs who is a queen himself, or just go to a gay bar and watching the screaming queens and how it's all a fake act that they put on.

I have also seen first hand that those drag queen types are pretty viscous and vindictive.

So, to put it short, you are a gay guy who hates gays who are camp because that behaviour takes men away from you. Bless you. Have a good night now.

 

[B_VinylBoy]

I loved this post, never, ever have i heard the expression open their mouths and a purse flies out hehe, so funny :biggrin1:

Yeah... usually I see a pair of Prada heels fall out. :wink:

 

[engorged]

whilst not sexually attracted to fem etc, it doesnt mean that i cannot form friendships and connect with fem...they are human, just like us.

whilst you might reject the term "internalised homphobia" imho, you are only cool with liking cock, cause you have built up a false sense of yourself, putting out to the world you are masculine.

there are masculine try hards like you, and then, there are natural, laid back masculine guys...and guess what...try hards to me are as unsexy as femmm...laid baid naturally masculine blokes get me going....

take some more time to like yourselfs guys, you aint that bad....

 

[D_Mylor Mentallydaft]

It was drag queens, nelly boys and fems that fought back at Stonewall back in 1969. Without them, we may not even have a LPSG board. You think we as a nation would be able to have open discussions about someone's penis online without the ability to co-exist with people who are homosexual?

dead on the bull's eye VB, a 100% unbiased and factual. You could have chewed the O.P’s ass a new one but you kept it very direct and impartial, was not expecting you to take such bigotry so easy.

banned within 5 hours of posting this.

yay mods!!

yes, he was, ….. albeit a troll most likely, and rude as high heaven….. as I recall from reading and watching footage, at stonewall, kent state, Selma, all over Alabama and Georgia in the marches, 68 convention and the evil in Mississippi …… I believe they were all –MOSTLY ANY WAY- there for HUMAN rights….. not just gays, or women or blacks….. when the greatest man of the 20the century stood infront of those people and talked about the mountain top, or that he had a dream….. don’t think he was real specific as to the person some one stuck it to or actually the color of their skin very often……. So just out of curiosity(genuine, this has always puzzled me) why is it, that after all these years, and speeches we can quote and messages pounded on us, that people like the O.P (who I do not agree with)’s opinion is some how lesser than yours and even wrong, just because yours is different and more widely espoused? Just always sounds sorta.... judgemental and presumptuous

Respect your roots. ALL of them. That has nothing to do with who you want to fuck.

agreed with to totally as i often do but i have to ask, how dose your "roots" of your homosexuality have to do with ANYTHING BUT who you fuck?

 

[craig1664]

Personally I have always had a sexual fascination with campy/femme men
I think it is a thrill to be at the beck and call of someone like that. Since one of my first affairs was with someone of that ilk maybe it is a carryover but he had a HUGE cock and even though he was very "femme" he was most certainly the one in charge.
I would love to replay those times today!!!

 

[voyeuristic]

If gay men want to be effeminate, they should be allowed that option. If straight men want to be effeminate, they should be allowed that option. If lesbians want to be masculine, they should be allowed that option. If straight women want to be masculine, they should be allowed that option. I look forward to the day when sexual determination and gender presentation are not seen as necessarily linked and compliance with the cliches doesn't feel like the only option (i.e. naturally masculine guys who might play up the queeniness in order to have more gay visibility), but blanket hating on any of the above groups is not going to expedite it.

 

[B_am12388]

This topic seems a bit unfair. :/

 

[pablovian]

I posted a thread like this a while ago and got hated on for it. I don't think I hate them quite as much as you though My point was; just because a guy likes dick doesn't mean he has to act or feel like a girl.

 

[houtx48]

"So what if I like to crochet, quilt, garden, cook, clean"...............you want my address?