...and use google to stalk people from years ago?
I've been doing that lately. It gets me down but I do it anyway.
I dwell on the shoulda-woulda-coulda type things. I imagine my life like the 'sliding doors' movie and wonder 'what if?' a lot.
Tonight I was on a friends facebook (we went to high school together) and from his page I went to another fellow high-schooler's page (someone I'm not friends with). Then that lead to pages of people who used to bully me. I dwell on what happened during my teen years and I get a bit down (I'm 28 now).
Does anyone else do this?
I have no control over the past, it's over. And I shouldn't care about what those people are doing now and what they would think of me now, and yet I do :sad2:
There is also a hint of jealousy. I was bullied in school for being pale (I lived in a hot country), being obsessed with horse riding (it was my escape and I was damn good at it) and being overweight. I ended up finding a youtube audition recording of a girl I went to school with; she's trying out for a tv show. She looks the same as she did in school; pretty, long thick hair, tanned, thin. I kinda wish she was fat and ugly though. Juvenile feelings but I can't help having them
Just feeling a bit low and had to share and rant :1zhelp:
I've been doing that lately. It gets me down but I do it anyway.
I dwell on the shoulda-woulda-coulda type things. I imagine my life like the 'sliding doors' movie and wonder 'what if?' a lot.
Tonight I was on a friends facebook (we went to high school together) and from his page I went to another fellow high-schooler's page (someone I'm not friends with). Then that lead to pages of people who used to bully me. I dwell on what happened during my teen years and I get a bit down (I'm 28 now).
Does anyone else do this?
I have no control over the past, it's over. And I shouldn't care about what those people are doing now and what they would think of me now, and yet I do :sad2:
There is also a hint of jealousy. I was bullied in school for being pale (I lived in a hot country), being obsessed with horse riding (it was my escape and I was damn good at it) and being overweight. I ended up finding a youtube audition recording of a girl I went to school with; she's trying out for a tv show. She looks the same as she did in school; pretty, long thick hair, tanned, thin. I kinda wish she was fat and ugly though. Juvenile feelings but I can't help having them
Just feeling a bit low and had to share and rant :1zhelp: