I know this is going to sound stupid, but have ran into a couple issues with the girlfriend and it doesn't seem she is ready to talk about it yet, so again, I'll post on here and ask for some input. :smile:
Please don't mistake me for being shallow or an asshole, I'm just trying to cover my bases for the future, as I have already invested a lot into this relationship and feel strongly about her. I also feel horrible at the same time for asking myself these questions, but I can't get them out of my head, because I feel like even if 90% of the other parts of the relationship are perfect, that the sexual piece will leave a huge hole missing.
So, onto the random stuff:
For some reason or another, she will not stick her tongue out past her lips. ( nor engage when kissing ever. ) I've tried lightly asking/teasing/etc and haven't gotten much of a response other than the claim that she can't.
She has also made comments about how even using flossing past her front teeth makes her gag, etc. ( obviously going to be an issue with any size then, but I'm asking myself if oral is ruled out completely then because of that + tongue, there isn't much left. )
I've been trying to establish a line with her, and it keeps fading. If you read my original post, things continue to fluctuate back and forth, and when I brought it up to her she wanted to talk about it later. I dunno when that will be, but I hope it is soon. ( although, I feel like it is going to be uncomfortable )
For example, this last weekend on Saturday, she didn't seem to have any issue while we were in the shower making out and having fun. ( With swim suits ) She had a small bikini on, and would allow for bare skin contact on the ass, but not the front (I already knew, didn't try or push it). I was already popping out of my swim trunks and for the first time she had direct contact and gave me a handjob. I repaid by massaging her through her swimsuit. ( would do more, but I am positive she won't let me )
Monday night, we're in the middle of messing around, and my boxers were just restricting the crap out of me so I adjusted myself and she immediately pulled back and seized everything. She thought I had pulled it out, and it took almost 15 minutes of asking what was wrong to get that out of her. She said she wasn't comfortable with me being completely naked.
At this point, I'm just downright confused, and I made that clear to her on monday, saying we really need to establish what is ok and what isn't. She claimed that she didn't know, and we would talk about it later.
Any suggestions? I know some of you may find this retarded, childish, etc. But I'm honestly looking for opinions because this is the first relationship in 4 years since the last, and it is actually going extremely well for the most part. Our likes, opinions, personalities, etc match great. She's beautiful, smart, and awesome all around. I just worry about her lack of self esteem and confidence and how long I can cope with it, and if I continue down this road if I will regret it later because I will not be able to fulfill the sexual need.
Anyways, have at it!
Please don't mistake me for being shallow or an asshole, I'm just trying to cover my bases for the future, as I have already invested a lot into this relationship and feel strongly about her. I also feel horrible at the same time for asking myself these questions, but I can't get them out of my head, because I feel like even if 90% of the other parts of the relationship are perfect, that the sexual piece will leave a huge hole missing.
So, onto the random stuff:
For some reason or another, she will not stick her tongue out past her lips. ( nor engage when kissing ever. ) I've tried lightly asking/teasing/etc and haven't gotten much of a response other than the claim that she can't.
She has also made comments about how even using flossing past her front teeth makes her gag, etc. ( obviously going to be an issue with any size then, but I'm asking myself if oral is ruled out completely then because of that + tongue, there isn't much left. )
I've been trying to establish a line with her, and it keeps fading. If you read my original post, things continue to fluctuate back and forth, and when I brought it up to her she wanted to talk about it later. I dunno when that will be, but I hope it is soon. ( although, I feel like it is going to be uncomfortable )
For example, this last weekend on Saturday, she didn't seem to have any issue while we were in the shower making out and having fun. ( With swim suits ) She had a small bikini on, and would allow for bare skin contact on the ass, but not the front (I already knew, didn't try or push it). I was already popping out of my swim trunks and for the first time she had direct contact and gave me a handjob. I repaid by massaging her through her swimsuit. ( would do more, but I am positive she won't let me )
Monday night, we're in the middle of messing around, and my boxers were just restricting the crap out of me so I adjusted myself and she immediately pulled back and seized everything. She thought I had pulled it out, and it took almost 15 minutes of asking what was wrong to get that out of her. She said she wasn't comfortable with me being completely naked.
At this point, I'm just downright confused, and I made that clear to her on monday, saying we really need to establish what is ok and what isn't. She claimed that she didn't know, and we would talk about it later.
Any suggestions? I know some of you may find this retarded, childish, etc. But I'm honestly looking for opinions because this is the first relationship in 4 years since the last, and it is actually going extremely well for the most part. Our likes, opinions, personalities, etc match great. She's beautiful, smart, and awesome all around. I just worry about her lack of self esteem and confidence and how long I can cope with it, and if I continue down this road if I will regret it later because I will not be able to fulfill the sexual need.
Anyways, have at it!