Are Men Born Dirty Minded Perverts Or Are They Taught

Bigcockman1

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steve2727

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I think men are born with strong natural urges, but are also rational, thinking beings with the power to control those urges if we want to.

The idea that men are hardwired to be perverts is used to excuse mens bad behaviour. 'Oh they can't help themselves'. Sure, our natural impulses give us the urge to cheat, act inappropriately to women etc. but the difference between an urge and an action is a decision, a decision the man makes.

So no, we aren't 'hardwired', we always have control over & responsibility for what we do.
 

Yorkie

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What's your opinion. I think men are hard wired to be perverts however I think the environment they were raised in has alot to do with it also.
Relationship Connection: Are all men just ‘gross, sex-crazed, weak things’ with no self-control?
I guessed what prompted this and a quick glance at the article confirmed my suspicions.
Someone who has been brainwashed by religion has turned out to be sexually repressed. Religious fanatics are the most perverted people of all.
 

Sagittarius84

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I think the common translation for perversion is a subjective thing, on a level. I think our wiring is as such that our urges and expressions of sexuality are much more readily outward, and also much more easily compartmentalized from emotional or social context.
I think the literotica that comes from women sources, even down to fanfics and ships of existing characters in media points to them being the truly dirty minded.
 
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deleted5796621

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well.............no facts required to state my opinion, so my opinion is that its the Reptilian Shape-shifters that are the cause of all this
 

dreamer20

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6inchcock

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I can only speak for me. I have been a dirty bastard from as far back as I can remember. No one had to teach me shit because I was all about discovery learning.

When women call men a life support system for a penis, yup fuck it I own it.

I don't think all of what we do or don't do makes us pervs, some shit is human nature. It's how we rationalize and prioritize what is and isn't important that probably drives how selectively we follow social mores and apply rules against ourselves.
 
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Acratopotes

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Given where we as a species fit into the taxonomical tree it seems like monogamy is not the natural state of things for us, i.e. we are not like some birds. The sex drive is also powerful and not something that is easily suppressed but we obviously to have some level of control over how we express it.

Personally, I think it is realistic to expect men to confine sexual activity with another person to their wife or partner when that is part of the agreement. If you stand up and promise "and forsaking all others" then you should keep that promise.

At the same time I am not sure it is reasonable to expect men to have a similar level of control over their sexual thoughts. I think it is entirely natural and unavoidable that men will look at other women, or other men, and get turned on. Sometimes they may even go home to their wives and both will benefit from some extra excitement. This is also completely in line with the way the law works in various other ways, i.e. we hold people accountable for their actions, not their thoughts.

Porn watching is kind of on the border here in that it is an action, rather than a thought, but it is also really common. If one expects too much control all that is guaranteed is failure.
 
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deleted1547822

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It's a compliment for those who value its meaning and know that it means a man who's sexually unashamed to flaunt his sexual urges in public and those men need to be celebrated.

“Celebrated”? Is that code for when the judge drops the gavel for the sexual assault charges?
 

MuscledHorse

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Males are hardwired for sex. It is a part of our DNA primal drives. Sexual monogamy among the animal kingdom is the exception not the rule. Our Xian influenced social structure runs counter to that Natural programming. It programs males to be ashamed of their cocks, guilty about their libido and it drills this into us from the start. We are raised to believe
1) masturbation is generally sinful (see story of Onan in the Bible, which is the common basis for calling it unnatural and sinful)
2) sex is dirty and sinful, unless it occurs between two people in a monogamous married relationship and then sex is the Ultimate Expression of Pure Love. No one questions how bereft of logic this is that the act of sex somehow magically transforms itself from sinful to saintly because they are raised to accept as so, even though our biology is telling us the opposite.
3) History of Xian era marriage is littered with the disastrous effects of relationships based on physical sexual ownership of the other and the fear and jealousy basis for relationships it created--along with giving us the concept of "cheating"--that has done far more harm than good. Just look at the marriage and divorce rates (and half the country music catalog from "your cheatin' heart" to "the Thunder rolls") and the evidence is clear.
In short, what we are socially raised to believe is sinful and wrong actually runs counter to our natural biological programming, and this leads to damage to the male psyche as it sets up an internal struggle between what we are biologically programmed to do and what we are socially programmed to believe, making us a monster in our own eyes.
 

Acratopotes

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...Our Xian influenced social structure runs counter to that Natural programming...

Could you expand on this Xian influence? When I Googled it I found only references to China and Taoism so I am not sure how those are relevant to the West.

It programs males to be ashamed of their cocks, guilty about their libido and it drills this into us from the start. We are raised to believe
1) masturbation is generally sinful (see story of Onan in the Bible, which is the common basis for calling it unnatural and sinful)

It is difficult to see how the story of Onan can justify that view of masturbation given that the act in that story was coitus interruptus, i.e. the withdrawal method of contraception. You could use it as the basis of the (mostly Catholic) view that all wasting of seed is a sin but even then it seems to be the story is more about greed and disobeying God than it is about that.

There are also some other explanations:

1. Following the discovery of the microscope it seems semen was one of the things examined. At the time the egg had not been discovered so this gave new life to an old idea that the woman's body was just the equivalent of "fertile ground" for the man's seed rather than sperm only being half of what was needed to make a baby.

2. It was noted that at least some of the men in mental insitutions would freely masturbate. Some took that as evidence that it was a behaviour with its roots in mental disorders. In fact the only thing their mental health had to do with it was the lack of inhibition. Bored out of their minds they resorted to a very normal and pleasurbale pursuit to fill the time.

2) sex is dirty and sinful, unless it occurs between two people in a monogamous married relationship and then sex is the Ultimate Expression of Pure Love. No one questions how bereft of logic this is that the act of sex somehow magically transforms itself from sinful to saintly because they are raised to accept as so, even though our biology is telling us the opposite.

That is an idea that does seem to me to have religious roots. It's also an idea that has less influence now than it has in the past. Many fewer people expect either to "save themselves" for marriage or for their partner to a virgin on their wedding night. If anything people now want to know that they are sexually compatible prior to marriage.

3) History of Xian era marriage is littered with the disastrous effects of relationships based on physical sexual ownership of the other and the fear and jealousy basis for relationships it created--along with giving us the concept of "cheating"--that has done far more harm than good. Just look at the marriage and divorce rates (and half the country music catalog from "your cheatin' heart" to "the Thunder rolls") and the evidence is clear.

I would say that there is a religious basis for that fact tha relationships are assumed, by default, to be monogamous despite the fact that this behaviour does not come naturally. Yet, despite the numereous reference is culture to people carrying on with others at the same time, some clearly do manage to stay monogamous.

But there is much to be said for encouraging people to do what's right for them. Single people do have sex outside of a relationship and people are free to have open relationships so the idea about cheating, or not, comes down to what one has agreed with the partner concerned rather than the view of the wider society. These are also not new. Harold Nicholson, from the diplomatic service, married Vita Sackville-West. He was bisexual and carried on with other men. She was probably also technically bisexual but definitely more lesbian that straight and carried on with Virginia Woolfe.

But on societal expections it seems that, in the past at least, society at large has taken much too great an interest in people's romantic and sexual lives. It is a thoroughly bad idea for statute to make certain acts between consenting adults illegal and not others just because legistators are personally disgusted by them. This has also worked hand in hand with "It's a sin" and "God will know even if we don't".

Yet it is reasonable to insist that sex is consensual and that when people have children they don't it to the state, i.e. taxpayers, to pay for them.
 
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Bigcockman1

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Could you expand on this Xian influence? When I Googled it I found only references to China and Taoism so I am not sure how those are relevant to the West.



It is difficult to see how the story of Onan can justify that view of masturbation given that the act in that story was coitus interruptus, i.e. the withdrawal method of contraception. You could use it as the basis of the (mostly Catholic) view that all wasting of seed is a sin but even then it seems to be the story is more about greed and disobeying God than it is about that.

There are also some other explanations:

1. Following the discovery of the microscope it seems semen was one of the things examined. At the time the egg had not been discovered so this gave new life to an old idea that the woman's body was just the equivalent of "fertile ground" for the man's seed rather than sperm only being half of what was needed to make a baby.

2. It was noted that at least some of the men in mental insitutions would freely masturbate. Some took that as evidence that it was a behaviour with its roots in mental disorders. In fact the only thing their mental health had to do with it was the lack of inhibition. Bored out of their minds they resorted to a very normal and pleasurbale pursuit to fill the time.



That is an idea that does seem to me to have religious roots. It's also an idea that has less influence now than it has in the past. Many fewer people expect either to "save themselves" for marriage or for their partner to a virgin on their wedding night. If anything people now want to know that they are sexually compatible prior to marriage.



I would say that there is a religious basis for that fact tha relationships are assumed, by default, to be monogamous despite the fact that this behaviour does not come naturally. Yet, despite the numereous reference is culture to people carrying on with others at the same time, some clearly do manage to stay monogamous.

But there is much to be said for encouraging people to do what's right for them. Single people do have sex outside of a relationship and people are free to have open relationships so the idea about cheating, or not, comes down to what one has agreed with the partner concerned rather than the view of the wider society. These are also not new. Harold Nicholson, from the diplomatic service, married Vita Sackville-West. He was bisexual and carried on with other men. She was probably also technically bisexual but definitely more lesbian that straight and carried on with Virginia Woolfe.

But on societal expections it seems that, in the past at least, society at large has taken much too great an interest in people's romantic and sexual lives. It is a thoroughly bad idea for statute to make certain acts between consenting adults illegal and not others just because legistators are personally disgusted by them. This has also worked hand in hand with "It's a sin" and "God will know even if we don't".

Yet it is reasonable to insist that sex is consensual and that when people have children they don't it to the state, i.e. taxpayers, to pay for them.

Great answer. Everything's you wrotes explains the situation perfectly.