Are Men Intimidated by Strong Women?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by D_Prudence_Admonition_Drightits, Mar 2, 2008.

  1. D_Prudence_Admonition_Drightits

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    I would like feedback from both men and women. I have posted excerpts from a few articles, remember just excerpts, not the full article. I did this because I did not want anyone to go cheat by going to the ending. I hope to have some good stimulating dialog on the subject. To help women understand how men may view strong women and what can they do. Likewise strong women, what do you want men to understand?

    "Some women believe that successful men are intimidated by successful women, that men prefer young lap dogs who stroke their fragile egos instead of strong women who challenge them as equals."- Tao of Steve

    "When women are too assertive, whatever that mysterious measure is, they’re branded with that great big “B” word or worse. And, yet, when they don’t quite make it to an acceptable measure of assertiveness, they are politely dismissed as inconsequential as buyers, whether they are acting independently or as a couple. It turns out that striking the perfect balance between charm and assertiveness is challenging at the very least. Many women have deemed it a fruitless effort, so they don’t even try."-Sex Advice Column

    "Smart women are less likely to marry. Successful men are romantically interested only in their secretaries. And if a woman makes a lot of money, men will be intimidated. Conservative and liberal pundits alike mythologized the failure of feminism and the "waste" of these talented women who were searching for soul mates."-ABC News

    "Look, a guy who just wants to have sex with you might very well be “intimidated” by the fact that you’re kind of a bad ass. What they’re looking for is someone who is super easy to deal with for the purposes of nailing them. Think “predator stalking a herd of deer.” If the man is in this mode, he’s not going to be going for the strongest in the herd. This might be what you’re seeing — as in, a guy who pays a lot of attention to you, but when he figures out that you’re, you know, YOU, he bails in favor of some young bimbo who can’t count past eleventeen."-Manslation
     
  2. optimum

    optimum New Member

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    They are intimidating, but it's mostly because women who think they want to be strong usually just end up turning into a hardcore snobbish bitch.

    I have collections upon collections of stories to back that up.
     
  3. invisibleman

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    I would like feedback from both men and women. I have posted excerpts from a few articles, remember just excerpts, not the full article. I did this because I did not want anyone to go cheat by going to the ending. I hope to have some good stimulating dialog on the subject. To help women understand how men may view strong women and what can they do. Likewise strong women, what do you want men to understand?

    "Some women believe that successful men are intimidated by successful women, that men prefer young lap dogs who stroke their fragile egos instead of strong women who challenge them as equals."- Tao of Steve

    "When women are too assertive, whatever that mysterious measure is, they’re branded with that great big “B” word or worse. And, yet, when they don’t quite make it to an acceptable measure of assertiveness, they are politely dismissed as inconsequential as buyers, whether they are acting independently or as a couple. It turns out that striking the perfect balance between charm and assertiveness is challenging at the very least. Many women have deemed it a fruitless effort, so they don’t even try."-Sex Advice Column

    "Smart women are less likely to marry. Successful men are romantically interested only in their secretaries. And if a woman makes a lot of money, men will be intimidated. Conservative and liberal pundits alike mythologized the failure of feminism and the "waste" of these talented women who were searching for soul mates."-ABC News

    "Look, a guy who just wants to have sex with you might very well be “intimidated” by the fact that you’re kind of a bad ass. What they’re looking for is someone who is super easy to deal with for the purposes of nailing them. Think “predator stalking a herd of deer.” If the man is in this mode, he’s not going to be going for the strongest in the herd. This might be what you’re seeing — as in, a guy who pays a lot of attention to you, but when he figures out that you’re, you know, YOU, he bails in favor of some young bimbo who can’t count past eleventeen."-Manslation

    Sometimes, media are incendiary. They sensationalize into order to provoke readers into :eek:mfg:,:boggled:, and:tongue-tied:. I don't care about whether someone is strong--male or female. My sister probably classifies herself as a strong woman. She likes sports and is built like a linebacker. She loves sports and likes to get her hair done.
    But being a strong person in life doesn't make you effective though.
    If a woman doesn't feel very strong these days. then, I want to let you know that men don't feel strong these days either. Every person lives in uncertainty and feels vulnerable. We deal.

     
  4. ZOS23xy

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    I'm not intimidated by strong women, I become interested in them. My own wife reflects that. She does local political work, teaches Alternatives to Violence workshops in State Prisons, was a roadie for a rock band, a bike messenger, and kept box office for an off Broadway play called TORCH SONG TRILOGY.

    I'm afraid the men who become antsy about strong women may not be comfortable with themselves.
     
  5. draW716

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    Men are fine with strong women. Boys (and boys in men's clothing) are intimidated by strong women.
     
  6. Gillette

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    I think this is generalizing a bit too much.

    Confident men aren't intimidated by strong women. Men with insecurities likely are. An intelligent, strong, confident man will be able to appreciate the stimulation a strong woman can offer him and even feel that much better about himself that he is the one to capture her attention.

    I can certainly see this holding true for those men seeking sport sex and adding notches to their belt. For these men the only thing a woman needs to do to be labeled a bitch is to correctly pronounce the word,"NO".

    Fortunately strong women already know that these men aren't worth a second thought. Mind you, if we are in the mood for easy meaningless sex, we know we can bat our eyelashes as vacantly as the next bimbo.
     
  7. B_Demention

    B_Demention New Member

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    For me, it's all in the attitude. If you're a capable, intelligent woman, great - earn more money than me, change the oil in the car, I don't care. Just don't be a battle-axe in your day to day dealings with me and other people. I see a lot of women who are empowered by the wrong things - failed relationships, father walked out when they were kids, listening to too much Alanis Morissette etc. That's deriving strength from jadedness. So it's fine to outperform me, my balls are big enough and I'll definitely be able to handle it. Just don't OD on testosterone and become a truly assertive woman who has no idea how and when to back down at the right times. Men naturally look for a certain sweetness/submissiveness in their women and I think in creating gender equality we have to be careful not to completely eliminate the things we're predispositioned to find attractive.
     
  8. Hockeytiger

    Hockeytiger Active Member

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    As in almost everything it depends. I generally have preferred stronger women in my relationships. My wife certainly is. However, there are some risks. Why is she strong? Is she strong because it is her natural personality or is she strong because she is afraid? Does she feel a need to always one-up me in order to be stronger? I don't need any of that. In fact, I want home to be a refuge from all that crap.

    While I want a woman to be strong, I prefer my relationship to be one of equals, not two people constantly struggling for control over each other.

    I'm not bothered by the fact that my wife makes more than I do. But I will not allow her to "call the shots". As I said, we are partners.

    All in all, I want a women who is willing to call me out if I am being an ass, but doesn't feel the need to finish my sentences for me.
     
  9. alex8.5

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    A long time ago, a former boss of mine was very very confident, but she came across as a bitch more than confident. No I am not intimadated by a confident woman. My editor and my lawyer are confidant women and they are very very nice ladies..
     
  10. D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead

    D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead Account Disabled

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    Strong women? Bring 'em on.

    I'm easily bored and highly opinionated, so I need someone to a) keep up and b) push back. Strong women are generally more aware of who they are, and one-dimensional people rarely stay very long in my life.
     
  11. transformer_99

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    Domineering types in either gender usually wind up alone sexually.

    [SIZE=+3]Gold Dust Woman[/SIZE] Written by S. Nicks [SIZE=+2]

    Rock on -- gold dust woman
    [/SIZE]

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    [SIZE=+2]And dig your grave[/SIZE]

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    [SIZE=+2]Wake up in the morning[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]See your sunrise -- loves -- to go down[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Lousy lovers -- pick their prey[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]But they never cry out loud[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Cry out...[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=+2]Well, did she make you cry[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Make you break down[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Shatter your illusions of love[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]And is it over now -- do you know how[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Pick up the pieces and go home[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=+2]Rock on -- ancient queen[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Follow those who pale[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]In your shadow[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=+2]Rulers make bad lovers[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]You better put your kingdom up for sale[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Up for sale[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=+2]Well, did she make you cry[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Make you break down[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Shatter your illusions of love[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]And is it over now -- do you know how[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Pick up the pieces and go home[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=+2]Well, did she make you cry[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Make you break down[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Shatter your illusions of love[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Now, tell me, is it over now -- do you know how[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Pick up the pieces and go home[/SIZE]
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    [SIZE=+2]And go home...[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=+2]Oooh, pale shadow of a woman[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Black widow[/SIZE]
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    [SIZE=+2]Oooh, pale shadow of a woman[/SIZE]
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    [SIZE=+2]Oooh, pale shadow, she's a dragon[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=+2]Gold dust woman...woman...woman...[/SIZE]
     
  12. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    I'm turned off by needlessly bitchy women, extremely high-maintenance women, arbitrary nitpicky women, judgmental snobbish women, strongly opinionated women who aren't half as smart as they believe themselves to be, egomaniacal women who think they are God's gift because they haven't figured out that any decent looking woman can get attention from guys if they want to.

    but strong women? no. Women in positions of authority, educated women, professional women, intelligent women, assertive women, confident women, women comfortable with their own sexuality, women willing to take the initiative, emotionally stable and independent women... those are all big turn-ons for me.

    So it depends on what you mean exactly. In my experience a lot of women who think of themselves as "strong women" are really just the egotistical God's gift or the not-as-smart-as-you-think-you-are variety I described above.
     
  13. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    Also I don't give a shit how much money you make if you don't give a shit how much money I make.
     
  14. sargon20

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    Gold Dust Woman was written when Stevie Nicks was cracked out on cocaine. Can it really make much sense?
     
  15. faceking

    faceking Well-Known Member

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    Not at all... I find this amusing in fact.
    my best bosses... in fact I'll say 4 of my top 5 have been women. And MORE IMPORTANTLY... I couldn't care if they were strong, weak, male, female etc... I find it odd that this is such a hang up for so many ppl... I don't really recognize a strong woman or man for that matter... I see it as she/he is good at [communication/drive/initiative/etc on the good side, and if bad then asshole/bitch/aggressive/etc...].

    Curious... what is there to be intimidated?? I still don't get it... if there is any intimidation then it shouldn't be any different if it was a man. But again... maybe it's insecurity in it's finest form.

    My assumption is that ,yes there are some men who may be, but at the same time many women (particulary alpha-types) are very sensitive and purposely looking to call a man out (when probably in fact, they may be intimidated but the point of it being because it's a woman is, and should be, moot).
    An extreme analogy would be asking Are Brunette Women Intimidated By Blonde Women...
    $.02
     
  16. transformer_99

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    I think it applies, male or female, the lyrics explain away why so many relationships fail, rather than "irreconcilable differences" ?
     
  17. D_Prudence_Admonition_Drightits

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    Insecurity in it's finest form- I think you may have answered your question.

    I don't know if this is a good comparison, but take someone like Oprah Winfrey, or even Hilary Clinton.
    Strong women- especially the later seems to be disliked because of it. Is it because she appears to be more bitchy? Just curious

     
  18. Ethyl

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    Not the ones I hang with.

    But yes, some can be.
     
  19. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    I see a lot of people accuse others of disliking Hillary Clinton because she is a strong woman. That's horseshit. She's not liked because she's not likeable.
     
  20. D_Prudence_Admonition_Drightits

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    In your mind what makes her not likable? Come on don't be shy.:wink::wink:

     
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