Are They Really Friends?

[BlackCock85]

So last week this guy & I decided to go to the White Party on Sunday (last night) that was to be held at a gay club. He ended up flaking on me and all my other gay friends were busy so I ended up not going at all. Now I was very excited and looking forward to going and it sucked that I couldn't. When sitting around I started thinking of something, why is it that I HAVE to go to a gay club and why wouldn't any of my other friends want to go with me. I mean us as gays always go out with our straight friends to their hangout spots but why if they're our friend and ok with our homosexuality can't they do the same and come along to a gay club. It makes me feel like if you're gay you have to go to the place where only gays go with gays; as if we're some sort of huge clan of diseased people that have to be locked up together away from the rest of society. Well discuss this and let me know what you think about real friends being able to go to a gay club with their gay friend.

 

[B_dxjnorto]

I don't see why not. Especially with a cute one like you.

 

[daddyknows]

please stop whining.

 

[NCbear]

I think a lot of people who're used to being in the majority become very uncomfortable when their numerical superiority is taken away. Sometimes, they don't even know why they feel so uncomfortable; they just do.

I've noticed this most with males in groups of females, whites in groups of blacks, and straights in groups of gays.

NCbear (who plans to come back to this thread often to see what other people have said)

 

[NCbear]

Connection to my previous post: This may be part of the reason why your straight friends don't want to hang out with you at gay clubs.

It could also be the reason why I prefer mixed clubs.

NCbear (who wonders sometimes when human society will mature into a sophisticated understanding of how interesting difference can be)

 

[Kit_kat19]

My Friend is gay and i go with him to gay clubs all the time, its a fun place to be, im even going with him to mardi gras on Sat

 

[D_ShiaLeTubeSteak]

Whining? - stop being so rude.

 

[BlackCock85]

Thanks for the feedback guys, I wish there was a good "mixer" place. Like don't get me wrong I have a great time at "normal" bars but it did come to my mind and I voiced my opinion to my best friend & his girlfriend and they really didn't say much to change how I felt. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to keep my gay & straight life separate until the world is more accepting and gay isn't abnormal.

 

[killerb]

If those people are really your friends, they should be able to go where you want to go sometimes without it being a problem...

believe me, I've made sacrifices for friends and I know mine have made some for me...

 

[B_Think_Kink]

Most people are uncomfortable with large groups of gay people. Tragic, they are missing out on something fabulous.

 

[Principessa]

I think the issue is that straight men in a gay club fear being hit on by gay men. How often are your gay male friends hit on by straight women in a straight club? Do the women there rub up against them and make overt sexual overtures which make your gay male friends uncomfortable? Cause I have heard of gay men in gay clubs behaving that way with straight men. Let's face it, if you are in a gay club the assumption is going to be that you are gay.

As for missing the white party that was just silly. You should have gone by yourself. You know perfectly well you would have met people there that you already know.

 

[killerb]

I think the issue is that straight men in a gay club fear being hit on by gay men. How often are your gay male friends hit on by straight women in a straight club? Do the women there rub up against them and make overt sexual overtures which make your gay male friends uncomfortable? Cause I have heard of gay men in gay clubs behaving that way with straight men. Let's face it, if you are in a gay club the assumption is going to be that you are gay.

I've had a couple of friends who identify as straight, but liked to frequent gay clubs...

when I asked why, I was told that the music was the most important thing to them & the gay guys were not a concern...

they also didn't care what anyone thought about them going to gay clubs...

 

[Principessa]

I've had a couple of friends who identify as straight, but liked to frequent gay clubs...

when I asked why, I was told that the music was the most important thing to them & the gay guys were not a concern...

they also didn't care what anyone thought about them going to gay clubs...

uh huh, I think your friends might actually be bisexual.

 

[killerb]

uh huh, I think your friends might actually be bisexual.

hey it's entirely possible...I've suspected the same thing...

but I have no idea what went down in their bedrooms!

 

[BIGBULL29]

Who wants to go to a straight club? Not me. I like gay clubs in general. The music and vibe are always better. I look beyond all the superficial, pretentious bullshit you see. I'm there strictly to chill and enjoy the tunes (maybe more:biggrin1:, but not usually)

 

[daddyknows]

Whining? - stop being so rude.

yes, and your contribution to this conversation would be what? i am entitled to my opinion as is everyone on this forum. and yes, this sounds like whinig to me.

 

[kudo451]

Jeez!
What makes you think it has anything to do with being str8 or gay? Its seems like its more about being comfortable in the space you want to party in. It might be so simple as your str8 friends aren't stimulated by being in a gay club, They like the place or the club where they feel in control and where they feel that they can make a fun night happen. Truth be told that might be a gay issue and it might not be. I know I get invited to a lot of clubs by different friends st8 and gay. They are hoping that the "life of the party" attitude i bring will translate to a location they favor. But I like the clubs I go too. So I don't want to go to other clubs where I have to reinvent my Mac.
You just have to face the fact that sometimes you just have selfish and flaky friends. People who just don't want to reinvent their party proclivities to satisfy what you want to do. They want to do what they want to do and what they know works for them, and if you happen to be there its all good. I think you would have this problem regardless of whether you or your friends where str8 or gay because flake is universal in any sexuality.