Are you a bottom gay man ?

[malakos]

I was referring to these specific labels: top vers bottom. None of them is limited to half a dozen features. Each one, is a person and each person, has its own individuality. And then, there is time, space ...

I don't follow? They seem to me pretty simple, single quality referential terms. For example a MSM can be called a top if he prefers to be the penetrating partner in intercourse. Nothing purist or absolute about that definition.

as the Chinese proverb says: no one bathes twice in the same river ... neither the river nor man will be the same, the second time.

Aww. People are giving the Chinese credit for that one now?

 

[Nudistpig]

I was referring to these specific labels: top vers bottom. None of them is limited to half a dozen features. Each one, is a person and each person, has its own individuality. And then, there is time, space ... as the Chinese proverb says: no one bathes twice in the same river ... neither the river nor man will be the same, the second time.

Also these terms come from BDSM. 60 years ago, gay men didn't use these terms. In fact, they only passed into popular usage in the 1990's. The way in which the vast majority of media frame them is heteronormative and rigid. The role takes on the character of an identity. It's supposed that tops are somehow better than bottoms despite the fact that two are required for the fuck to happen. I've seen increasing rigidity and nonsense around what guys will do or not do based on their fantasies of what either is. In the end, men who won't get penetrated as tops or penetrate as bottoms are fairly useless beyond that binary in terms of facilitating sex. Since so called bottoms outnumber so called tops by 6 to 1 at least the need for versatility and flexibility should be apparent. I think this is in part what he means.

 

[dreambridger]

I've noticed, as a generalization and not as an absolute, that people who favor the submissive role in their sexual relationships tend to be have more dominant traits in their career and social life. I've known both men and women who are self-described 'bottoms' that tend to have jobs that demand a lot of executive and managerial choices, and then when they're in a social setting, they're dominating the conversation. Then, in bed, they just want to be told what to do, as a sort of escape from that, a chance to finally surrender.

not trying to feed the troll of course, since the original post on this thread was inane of course, just a thought I had reading it.

and enjoying the feeling of being anally penetrated doesn't mean you necessarily take a submissive role, it just means you've discovered the bliss of prostate stimulation.

 

[Nudistpig]

I've noticed, as a generalization and not as an absolute, that people who favor the submissive role in their sexual relationships tend to be have more dominant traits in their career and social life. I've known both men and women who are self-described 'bottoms' that tend to have jobs that demand a lot of executive and managerial choices, and then when they're in a social setting, they're dominating the conversation. Then, in bed, they just want to be told what to do, as a sort of escape from that, a chance to finally surrender.

not trying to feed the troll of course, since the original post on this thread was inane of course, just a thought I had reading it.

and enjoying the feeling of being anally penetrated doesn't mean you necessarily take a submissive role, it just means you've discovered the bliss of prostate stimulation.

I agree up to the point that the claim is made that anal penetration and prostate bliss isn't submissive. The mechanics are what they are. You must submit to the penis at some point to enjoy this.

 

[Nudistpig]

Aww. People are giving the Chinese credit for that one now? [/QUOTE]

Heraclitus was a known theif.

 

[1178303]

I agree up to the point that the claim is made that anal penetration and prostate bliss isn't submissive. The mechanics are what they are. You must submit to the penis at some point to enjoy this.

The bottom can be in control and so is not submissive.

 

[malakos]

Heraclitus was a known theif.

Indeed?

 

[erpap]

I love a big alpha top to pound me into oblivion! However, I don’t do it in a effeminate or submissively. And when I do it submissively it’s in a very masculine manner!

 

[DckHntr_09]

yeah I'm a bottom but depending on the mood at the time depends on if I'll be submissive or not. But I generally like the top to take the lead. nothing effeminate about that to me though.

 

[Nudistpig]

No, I'm carrying on.

 

[malakos]

No, I'm carrying on.

If you had said Diogenes was, I would have believed you readily!

 

[sheerq]

100% cocksucker bottom here.

 

[Brodie888]

I guess this thread highlights the fact that we live in a heteronormative world and that there are lots of people out there who view gay relationships through a heterosexual lense which assumes there must be a mommy gay and a daddy gay. Same with Lesbians too.

The irony is that in just about all my straight couple friendships, the woman is the one in control, who makes the big decisions and the guy just does as he's told because he knows life is easier to just agree and go along with what she wants.

 

[Nudistpig]

I guess this thread highlights the fact that we live in a heteronormative world and that there are lots of people out there who view gay relationships through a heterosexual lense which assumes there must be a mommy gay and a daddy gay. Same with Lesbians too.

The irony is that in just about all my straight couple friendships, the woman is the one in control, who makes the big decisions and the guy just does as he's told because he knows life is easier to just agree and go along with what she wants.

In my parent's case it was clear my mother's judgment was by far the more rational in matters of finance, strat planning and politics. He learned quick and early.