Are you a complete loser if ...

[blakobra8]

Not necessarily. You could be a totally awesome person, but if you are a totally awesome person, you've probably had the option to hook up at some point and turned it down because you are incredibly self assured and confident. But that's a pretty rare brand of person.

But what do I know?

 

[B_nyvin]

You've missed out on a lot in life....so yeah, that's at least pretty close to loser. Throw in smoking, being overweight, and watching soap operas and you're basically there (as a male)

 

[D_Forrest Phallately]

Of course you are not a loser.

There are probably more people than generally thought who are socially awkward which goes along with being shy, which in turn affects confidence, which makes them stay in their shell.

Get comfortable with who you are.

Know that you are good enough.

Practice making small talk--gets you used to talking with women.

Get some counseling if available. Sometimes just some insight gained from a counselor who encourages you can be the catalyst you need. Sometimes people come across as weird or creepy just because they don't recognize the subtleties of interaction.

Have confidence. If you don't have confidence then fake confidence (not arrogance) until it develops.

Risk rejection. Risk rejection. Risk rejection. Rejection won't kill you. It will make you stronger. The pain of rejection, while never pleasant, will diminish as you realize there are many fish in the sea and if one rejects your worm there are others who will take the bait.

Stop watching porn for ideas about how women think and what they want in bed.

 

[airc3]

Basically, you can choose to do something or do nothing. I am in the same position and choose to do nothing. I just don't feel the attraction to people anymore and have surpressed my feelings long enough that I am content being alone. It seems to bother other people more then it bothers me.

Before dropping $$$ for professional help, have you tried talking to your friends about it? Maybe they can set you up with someone, even as a practice date? My friends keep trying to set me up, but I reject every time.

 

[C6point2]

Work on your body and improve your confidence. If the changes you see in your body ignite something in you go with it. Get in good shape and become proud of your body. It will be a great source of confidence.

Improve your social skills. When you are ready to go out with your friends don't think you have to do anything right away. Try to find friends who are good with girls and you are comfortable around them and when girls will come around try to act "as if" you've been there before. Just follow the lead of your friends.

Make a friend. Before you meet a girl to hook up with you'll probably meet a girl who likes you as a friend. Hang out with her, see if it doesn't help with your attitude and your confidence. Don't worry about fucking her.

Do those 3 things and a girl will come to you. Don't force the issue, but don't pass on anymore opportunities. When you know a girl likes you pay attention to her and all you have to do is act interested and let them do the work. it is really that simple. But you gotta close the Deal! At some point you have to initiate the first kiss and when it comes take your time and don't miss lol.

I was 18 when i had my first kiss, i fucked up by telling the girl it was my first kiss in the middle of the kiss and then getting embarrassed about it but oh well. SHE WAS SO FUCKING HOT. it was easy, she told my friend who was a girl that she liked me and i asked the friend for her phone #, called the girl and went from there. so I did had to grab my balls at some point. Good luck bro,. I don't consider you a loser.

 

[372757]

I most certainly don't think so. Although I have had a few gfs before, there are just times in my life I didn't care about having one. In fact right now is one of them. I am trying to lay the foundation for a successful career and know that a gf could get in the way of me trying to achieve my current career goals. I know there will be a time when I will be ready for a relationship, but it's just not right now. I want to make sure I have some job security so I know I can provide for a family long term.

 

[twrl_grl]

Loser? No way. That's too harsh a judgment. It's not like people douse themselves in sex-repellent.

 

[mexdude]

Improve your social skills. When you are ready to go out with your friends don't think you have to do anything right away. Try to find friends who are good with girls and you are comfortable around them and when girls will come around try to act "as if" you've been there before. Just follow the lead of your friends.

Make a friend. Before you meet a girl to hook up with you'll probably meet a girl who likes you as a friend. Hang out with her, see if it doesn't help with your attitude and your confidence. Don't worry about fucking her.

Do those 3 things and a girl will come to you. Don't force the issue, but don't pass on anymore opportunities.

Talking with women with confidence its the problem anymore really, dnt have friends that are good woth ladies, sometimes i go out with my cousins, but its rare when it happens, for a while i will stay like this, i dnt have ways to meet women, i asked for help meeting someone to everyone i know, but i didnt worked out with any, so there it is