Length matters to me (within reason). I'm one of the seemingly rare women who likes having my cervix bumped, plus there's the anterior and posterior fornix to take into consideration.
What in Earth do you mean by "emotional size"? Do you mean how much love/affection/etc we have with the person or what?
Edited to add: just saw the other post. Yes and no. I've had some mind blowing amazing orgasms with friends with benefits. I've had lousy sex with significant others. I love my partner and the sex was always good, even when we were "just" friends with benefits. It has only gotten better since.