Are you loyal?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by crushted, Aug 21, 2011.

  1. crushted

    crushted New Member

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    For gay, bi and straight.
    Im just curious, i see bad people in relationship. They are cheating....

    ARE YOU LOYAL TO YOUR BF/GF/PARTNER/FUCK-BUDDY?

    FOR ME IM NEVER IN RELATIONSHIP AND IF I GET A GOOD MAN I WILL BE LOYAL 100% . NO DOUBT :)

    I KNOW MAYBE SOME PEOPLE THINK THIS IS A SILLY QUESTION
    PASS IF YOU MIND B-)
     
  2. rbkwp

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    Yes always been loyal to partners
    and now like you
    i am loyal to myself ha

    a LOT easier to be loyal to yourself hah
    enz
     
  3. D_Kitten_Kaboodle

    D_Kitten_Kaboodle Account Disabled

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    You may find this an odd response... but Yes, I consider myself loyal to my husband. I am faithful to him in my heart... he can trust me, we are honest, and totally truthful in all we do.

    You say you have never been in a relationship (yet) but you have no doubt of your loyalty and commitment to a partner if and when that happens. That is good, that is the way everyone should feel.

    But never EVER say that you will NEVER do something, because usually that is the exact thing you will end up doing. I'm not sure why that happens, maybe we become so confident that we are 'above' that type of behavior...and then we never see it coming until it's too late. So just a word of caution. Beware of what you say and who you condemn.....keep an open mind.
     
  4. LaFemme

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    Yes, I am loyal. Loyal and faithful. Sometimes it isn't easy, as one gets older you start to realize how complicated relationships can be. But yes, I have always been loyal and faithful to the people I love and have promised my faithfulness to.
     
  5. crushted

    crushted New Member

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    Thanks for the response :)
    Its great to know some loyal people B-)
     
  6. SyddyKitty

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    I'm extremely loyal... even to a fault. Being so loyal has come back to bite me a few times - it hurts more than normal if someone I'm with is even slightly unfaithful. I often tend to rant on about other's lack of loyalty too... >_>
    Loyalty and faithfulness are synonymous 100% in my case.
     
    #6 SyddyKitty, Aug 21, 2011
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2011
  7. B_thickjohnny

    B_thickjohnny New Member

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    I'm very loyal to those I love and care for. Problem is finding someone who is loyal in return. I found that out being devoted to someone for four years and finding out he was a serial cheater. It's really fucked me up.
     
  8. Phil Ayesho

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    Wise words, well chosen.

    People who have never been in a long term relationship often imagine how they will handle it... but that is like claiming you Know you will make it to the top of Everest, when you have never even been mountain climbing before.

    I have had two long term relationships in my life, and I would say I started both believing in my heart that I would remain faithful.

    In my first I failed... and the marriage decayed... but I can not with certainty say that it would not have decayed had I been faithful. I was having to cope with a wife who was increasingly clearly an alcoholic... and we were both so young when we wed, had so much growing yet to do that it was nearly impossible that that growth would not pull us apart.

    In my second... I succeeded. I was faithful despite ample opportunity... But, that relationship also decayed over time... and my partner ended up believing in her heart that I had been unfaithful.

    Let me ask you, OP, if you could lie beside a mate, night after night, for three long years, waiting for her to reach for you in the night? To respond in kind to your caress? Could you do that and never seek solace on another person's arms? Never succumb to the warm welcome you saw in some other's eyes?

    Being faithful does not mean your mate will honor you for it. It does not prevent her/him from deciding you are less of a person...

    All we ever know of each other is what we chose to believe of them.
    In the beginning, we chose to believe everything wonderful... we value all those traits we have sought so long, and disregard the faults because they seem so trifling in comparison to all that is wonderful.

    But over time, we grow accustomed to that very wonderfulness we once found so hard to find... it becomes our daily due, that which we expect.
    It fades into the background of what life is like, now... and so we come to ignore it, as we do a scent, once we have been surrounded by it long enough.

    And then those faults, that once seemed so minuscule, begin to grate.

    Where we once were starving such that Spam would seem a delicacy... now we eat caviar every day and complain about its slightest shortcoming.


    Love is not blind... and we do not come to see each other more accurately over time... rather, we never see any more of one another than what we decide to pay attentions to, and what we pay attention to changes.

    The person you end up divorcing acrimoniously is the same person you once dreamed of being forever beside... and all that has changed about them is what you chose to believe... how you elect to interpret their actions.

    It is rare to for two people, to find each other, so well suited in the deepest sense that they can, both, avoid the pitfalls of complacency and ennui. Rarer still, two people who can take full responsibility for how they chose to see their mate... to make the choice, with each day's dawn, to look at their love with the same eyes with which they first saw them... to keep believing that their faults are nothing, compared to how wonderful they can be.


    The kind of judgment FancyPants warns against is the kind of mindset that is doomed to fail at relationship. The kind that sets absolutes on an action, or indiscretion, when you really have no idea the arc of suffering and insufficiency that may lead another to stray...

    The kind of inflexibility that can not see that what your mate asks you to suffer in them is never any worse than what you ask them to suffer in you.

    Until you have stood atop Everest, you have no idea if or even how you can make it. All you can do is try.


    Fidelity, in and of itself, is not necessarily character. A man of no libido is not fighting the same demons as a man driven by passions.

    Character is a bridge you build between the person that you are born, and the person that you strive to become.
    And the intention and industry with which you build matter more than gaining the far shore.
     
  9. helgaleena

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    I am a loyal type. And as I got older I discovered that like all emotions, loyalty has a flip side. It's submission. To stay loyal when it has become absurd to continue takes deliberate refusal to think and leads to numbness and misery.

    Never stay loyal to someone who is using and abusing you. That is what I have learned. Do not remain loyal as if loyalty itself will make things just. It will not.
     
  10. Phil Ayesho

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    well said
     
  11. D_Pokin Joe Frazier

    D_Pokin Joe Frazier New Member

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    I think you have to be loyal to yourself befor you can be loyal to anybody else.
     
  12. Phil Ayesho

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    not sure what that means... A guy fucking everything in a skirt might be acting loyal to his own disregard for anything but personal sexual conquest.
     
  13. B_Nia88

    B_Nia88 New Member

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    A believe in loyalty is very important
     
  14. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    I state right from the get go I'm not going to be monogamous. If someone starts to get their feelings hurt when I start to take interests in other people well it's their issue.

    But I AM extremely loyal to those who have earned my trust.

    OP I think you are mistaking faithfulness for loyalty.
     
  15. Daichii

    Daichii New Member

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    I'm loyal. I'll go to war and back with those I care for. But if by chance they cross me, I'll ignore forever. Until they explain or admit they're wrong.

    For example, I'll call a cousin for his/hers birthday. They forget to call for mine. I'll remember that. And hold it against them if they're in a pinch/need advice.

    We can have fun chill go out all year etc, but miss my bday and call me afterwards... like no big deal, you know that's ignorant.
     
  16. helgaleena

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    BTW, I am just now being loyal to two. :redface:
     
  17. rbkwp

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    Dave Dobbyn 'Loyal' - YouTube


    I can't remember last time I thanked you,
    Keeping my distance unintentionally.
    Too close for comfort, just ain't close enough.
    If I could have more time we would brainstorm.
    And I love you tender, but we must walk away,
    Keeping you on my greeting card file.
    And if it were different - did you know it ain't?
    Let's get on with it love...
     
  18. D_Sam Rockswell

    D_Sam Rockswell New Member

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    I'm very loyal, which i think does get me into a lot of trouble. I'm very expressive when in a relationship and i try to be receptive to my SO feelings but most times that's seen as being way too emotional.

    I guess loyalty it is a form of submission. Having to reign in your hormones an what not. I don't have a problem with that though. I've never physically cheated on anyone. What i have done though is look for emotional acceptance outside of a relationship (i.e. a friend).

    Communication helps though. Not only communication between parties but with yourself. Well that and being decisive in your actions.
     
  19. D_Pokin Joe Frazier

    D_Pokin Joe Frazier New Member

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    Ha that's funny I thought I was the only one.
     
  20. crushted

    crushted New Member

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    Mmmm interesting.....
     
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