Arousal After Bad Relationships

Kimahri

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So, after many years of awful guys, I finally got with a guy that I'm very into. We've been doing very well. He's stated some of the things we've done he's never done before ( almost no down time in between ejaculating )

While I'm engaged and really into him, I notice that my own arousal isn't quite what I recalled it being. I'm not having any trouble getting it up or anything, just the intensity isn't where it used to be.

After a few talks with a therapist, my past relationships really did a number on me. But it's not something that can't be corrected. Before I go throwing money at a sex therapist, I figured I'd ask the experienced folks for thoughts here. I've never been involved with someone that I really wanted to correct and improve myself for. I've been here for years and figured I'd ask the members.
 

KevinOso

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I totally understand how you are feeling. My ex, who I was with for 6 years was sexually open. We would often have threesomes and get into pretty kinky stuff. My husband who I have been with also for 6 years is the complete opposite. There is nothing wrong with that. When I explained it to my therapist she said that I crave my old sex life because it’s consider trauma. I’ve been trying to work on it and getting past the trauma but it is very difficult. It’s not that I am not attracted to my husband it’s just our sex life is very different than the sex life I had with my ex.