I couldn't post more earlier since I was pinched for time before...
But I wanted to add that Calboner made an excellent point.
My take on it Jovial, is this...
If a woman is with a man who, treats her not in the way she needs to be treated, then it is her sole responsibility to liberate herself from this guy. She needs to be strong enough and have a respectable enough level of self-worth to walk when she isn't happy.
I don't believe that this is any man's, yours especially, responsibility to extract her from such a relationship. Here is why:
1) In my opinion, a woman who isn't strong enough to walk away from a negative situation, isn't strong enough for me. I don't like it when women tell me their predictable, re-run sob stories and they looked shocked when I ask them point blank: "Well why didn't you do anything about it? Why did you wait?" What this indirectly tells me is that she is not strong enough to stand alone when times get hard. Women who need to cling on to one relationship and bail as soon as another guy arrives tells me not that she is a sweet little damsel in distress, but rather a weakling who needs male companionship to keep alive her already dying self-image. Even if you are her "hero" today, when things get hard you will be just another "zero" to her, and she will bail as soon as another dope shows up to "rescue" her.
2) Women who dig abusive guys have problems of an unlimited variety. That goes without saying. And when they "break-up" they are never REALLY broken up. I see a lot of guys thinking they are smooth picking up these rebound women, and I have seen on more than one occasion these guys get the daylights beat out of them or worse when they tinker with a "claimed" woman. While the "hero" is laying there in a coma, the sweet little damsel is trying to figure out how to get the money to bail the other thug boyfriend out of jail for it.
3) This is of my own moral code, but I don't hit on, nor am I receptive of, a woman who is taken. If she is "taken" and hitting on me...she's already lost my interest for being scandalous in the first place.
You seem like a good guy Jovial, I would suggest you shoot for a woman who dictates her OWN happiness rather than who wants to be rescued.
Good luck!
...OB