At the gym

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by KinkGuy, Apr 10, 2005.

  1. KinkGuy

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    This "situation" if you will, happened this afternoon at my health club. A fairly nice facility, with male only areas. As I was coming out of the shower in the locker room, I had to pass by the other side of the bench where a young (6-7 yo) boy and his father were changing for their workout, swim, whatever. The little boy, in all the innocence of youth pointed at my penis and said in his normal, loud little voice, "Look Daddy that man has a big earring in his pee thing." Dad looked at me, and physically turned his son away and said, "Some men are sick and do terrible things and we shouldn't look at them." I stopped dead in my tracks, looking at the back of the mans head, trying to decide what to do. The gentlemen in me took control and I dressed to head home. As I was packing my gym bag, the father came over, leaned down and said, "I don't care what kind of sick perversions you practice in your life, but you should be stopped from exposing our young children to this kind of thing." Sheesh, and all I wanted was a good workout and a swim. Guess he told me! The one I feel sorry for is the the little guy who's head is being filled full of crappola.
     
  2. Imported

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    bigjim13579: If the father did not want his son exposed to nudity in the locker room, he should not have taken the chld there in the first place. The dad was way out of line to have said anything negative about the kid's observation. The kid probably was also exposed to tatoos, cut and uncut cocks, pierced ears, piecced nipples, incontenance bags, etc. Why did dad single you out for harassment? Dad was probably a born-again Christian bigot who jumped to conclusions about your piercing. What's the big deal anyway? A lot of men both straight and gay have PAs.





     
  3. KinkGuy

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    OK, big14, I promise, I'll keep it out of your face. :p I would have read "dad" the riot act if it hadn't been for the little kid. I didn't think he needed any more negative input for one day. Any actions or words on my part would have just given the "dad" added proof that he was "right."
     
  4. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    I would have taken my son's hand and quietly explained:

    "Yes, he does have a ring in his penis doesn't he? His name must be Pierce." Then I would have continued the subject on a 5-year-old's need-to-know level in the car on the way home.
     
  5. jonb

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    Don't go to a locker room if you don't want your son to see men naked. (And what's wrong with seeing men naked? It's not like they're going to be masturbating or having sex in the locker room, unless you're in one of THOSE gyms.) If you don't like gambling, skip Vegas and go to Branson.
     
  6. KinkGuy

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  7. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    Bluntly put, the guy had a right to his own opinion, thick headed and self righteous tho it may have been. but then to have come over to you and criticize your lifestyle when he brought the boy into the lockerroom to begin falls under the term of hypocrite.

    Between you and me, the poor putz, the father shouldn't have been paying that much attention to begin with, and dragged it out. You didn't instigate this, but it seemed like he wanted to put you in your place. My personal tidbit; He does it again, that is-pushes his opinions on you, I'd complain to the gym owner.
     
  8. Altairion

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    Kink, I have to say that I have to admire you for your restraint. When that guy would have come over to tell me that didn't "care what kind of sick perversions you practice in your life, but you should be stopped from exposing our young children to this kind of thing." I would have smacked him on the floor...in front of his kid.

    If someone needs to feel that arrogant, then they flat out deserve it.
     
  9. KinkGuy

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    The only reason I DIDN'T get into it with dear old dad (who must have inadequacy issues hehe) was BECAUSE of his son. I just wanted the kid, to see this one time, that manners and grace are masculine qualities and we don't have to stoop to that level. At least that was the message I sent myself. I would have much rather popped him one.
     
  10. Dr Rock

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    "...and some men need to mind their own fucking business, unless they really don't need both their arms."

    seriously, if some dipshit had tried that shit on with me, especially in a fucking locker room for crying out loud, they'd have been shitting teeth for a week. I have to admire your self-control.
     
  11. 25cm

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    The only reason I DIDN'T get into it with dear old dad (who must have inadequacy issues hehe) was BECAUSE of his son. I just wanted the kid, to see this one time, that manners and grace are masculine qualities and we don't have to stoop to that level. At least that was the message I sent myself. I would have much rather popped him one.
    [post=299444]Quoted post[/post]​
    [/quote]

    Hey kink. whose words do you think that kid'll remember: his father's or yours? And whose actions do you think he'll remember: his father's (frankness) or yours (manners and grace)? I'm thinking a child that young is not yet able to distinguish the finer shades of behaviours.
     
  12. Lex

    Lex
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    See, the wisdom of Pecker's years comes through again. Kink--I am glad that you did not go off on the dad--that really wouldn't have changed anything. Rather, by showing restraint-you have basically said to him--your opinion does not matter to me. A middle ground would have been to say to him that lotsof people have lots of different piercings and just b/c I am pierced doesn't make me a bad person, just different than you.

    That dad is obviously disturbed.
     
  13. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    Yeah, that guy was totally out of line and he didn't do his son a good service. The boy has learned that 1) it's okay to insult people in front of others, 2) 'different' is bad and 3) if you don't grow up to be like me I'll hate you, too.

    I can imagine that the guy couldn't wait to tell his minister about the encounter so he could get a pat on the back for being a good shepherd.

    You did the right thing to restrain yourself, Kink. By doing so, you actually won.
     
  14. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    the pain behind your eyes
    "...and some men need to mind their own fucking business, unless they really don't need both their arms."

    seriously, if some dipshit had tried that shit on with me, especially in a fucking locker room for crying out loud, they'd have been shitting teeth for a week. I have to admire your self-control.
    [post=299467]Quoted post[/post]​
    [/b][/quote]

    Please! The guy doesn't need that gentle of a treatment there, Dr Rock. Personally, if little junior wasn't with DOD(Dear Old Dad!), I'd have probably asked the guy if he values breathing without life support for starters.
     
  15. Imported

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    gamma_phi: Mr. Kink, I must applaud your efforts at keeping your cool, for the kids :thumbsup: . We have to protect our children from things they may not understand and therefore don't need to see or hear. But but my biggest issue is with parents who allow their children to do certain things and then complain about them later. It seems to be a lack of fundamental parenting skills in my opinion...you've got to anticipate some things MIGHT happen, and if you don't want your kid exposed to things, then you shouldn't allow your children to be exposed to them.
     
  16. Imported

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    NelsonMuntz84:
    I Agree 100%, he's lucky he wasn't explaining to his son why he was lying on the floor after getting punched in the face.
     
  17. surferboy

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    I admire his restrait too. I woulda told him off. Not in a personal manner though, I'm like my mom; her and I will tell ya off without gettin personal or putting you down. I don't give a shit his 5 year old was with him. That kind of closed minded garbage needs to end.
     
  18. B_RoysToy

    B_RoysToy New Member

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    What a stable and mature person you must be, kinkguy. I commend you for your reaction in the gym. I think Pecker's first advise adding a bit of lightness to the situation (his name must be Pierce!) and then explaining more on the way home is pretty ingenious, but have to take exception to his thinking the Dad ran to his minister to get a "slap on the back". I don't know of any men of the cloth who would condone the Dad's behavior. Regardless of the reputation of the far right, we should keep in mind what they are, i.e. the FAR right that doesn't encompose the vast majority of Christians. Generalizing is dangerous and harmful.
     
  19. B_UNKNOWN321

    B_UNKNOWN321 New Member

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    I like all the answers from you guys and if the kid could have been taken into protective custody for a few minutes it would have been appropriate for you to use your pee thing in his face. Seriously I spent years mastering the well worded put down to such people when those rare occasions occurred where I needed to go into an uncontrollable rage free of any offcolor words also. But though the offending party often stands back in amazement at the shower of pejorative excoriating things I will say about them in the end I always felt the fool. Winning a battle of words still leaves you totally drained and may have caused a fist fight anyway. So motlissof who never loses his temper in his posts because he never has had reason to (ha!) and is being a self righteous twat about now would do what?

    I found that sometimes an offputting totally off the wall comment will usually so baffle the offending beast that you can walk out with your head held high and still subtly let someone know that you think they are an asshole, but children will not have a clue except to know that for example, "Daddy, that man with a ring in his pee thing seemed so nice when you talked so ugly to him"

    I have done this on some occasions and it takes supreme control and you must act as if you are sincere when you say it without any tremor in the voice and never stoop to sarcasm. I would have said something like this, "Though I place no value on your opinion, I want to thank you for sharing your ideas with me, I thank God every day that we can express our opinions so freely and want to congratulate you for taking advantage of that great freedom. Little man, you are lucky to have such a nice daddy to come over and talk to me. Have a nice day both of you" You might want to add, all the time maintaining firm eye contact and exposing the teeth as much as possible in a friendly smile, "And if you would ever like to have one of these rings, I can tell you where to get one". Then walk out and don't look back, however if it happens another time, kill him (quickly install a ring in his pee thing so everyone will know it certainly wasn't you that did it) and adopt the child.
     
  20. BuffMusicIdol

    BuffMusicIdol New Member

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    Kudos, Kink.
    There is another aspect of this also.

    You didn't hand over your power to the idiot by losing your temper. You remained in control. The other guy lost his real power by being so easily manipulated. (Everything else in life he doesn't like will also cause outbursts. What a fool.) His poor kid will be abused his whole childhood because he sees dad can't control his temper and emotions, and so the kid never learns any healthy boundaries about interacting with people. He'll most likely grow up to be the asshole his dear old dad wanted him to be.

    If everyone gives in to this type of bad conduct and opinionated B.S. then it's a sad world. But you are one of the people who are trying to make it a better one.


    (I know, I'm full of shit too. Deal with it.)
    :)
     
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