attraction: how visual are you?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by dolfette, Oct 6, 2009.

  1. dolfette

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2006
    Messages:
    11,901
    Likes Received:
    25
    i hear a lot of the ''if he looked like brad pitt you'd blah blah blah'' from guys,
    but actually, i'm just not a very visual person when it comes to attraction.
    if i see a good looking guy what i feel is appreciation of beauty, not sexual attraction or excitement.
    it's like seeing a good piece of sculpture. it just doesn't make my cunt twitch.
    on the plus side this means i'm not swayed by good looks...behave like a creep or an arsehole and being an adonis won't protect you from my wrath.

    i've dated a couple of models but it certainly wasn't their looks that attracted me.
    ...obviously i have minimum levels of physical attractiveness. no amount of physics talk and humour could make some men attractive. but i find attraction to them physically follows attraction to them mentally.

    well, that's me. what's you?
     
  2. Countryguy63

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2006
    Messages:
    14,488
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,446
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    near Monterey, Calif.
    Verified:
    Photo
    Unfortunately...Very :mad:
     
  3. dolfette

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2006
    Messages:
    11,901
    Likes Received:
    25
    haha! in that case, i shall put a self av up and be as obnoxious as i like :tongue:
     
  4. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2007
    Messages:
    11,912
    Likes Received:
    44
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York City, by way of Marblehead, Boston and Ge
    Too much so. It makes me feel shallow. But I honestly think it's a "guy thing".

    On the other hand, I'm all about the package (no, not that one). If you make me laugh, if you're smart, etc., you'll get immeasurably sexier to me. And if you don't/can't/aren't, I'll turn off. So, there.
     
  5. D_Jared Padalicki

    D_Jared Padalicki Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    8,104
    Likes Received:
    33
    Someone 's looks catch my eye, so I'm quite visual... But I don't mind, because in the end I get a long with any one, not based on their looks.
     
  6. teasedsilly

    teasedsilly Member

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2005
    Messages:
    211
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    DC
    I'm very visual, but that said much of a person's appearance is in the way they care for and carry themeselves. Also, personality can either suppress or showcase natural beauty. A laugh or smile almost always makes a woman more attractive. It's all visual, but it's hard to separate natural appearance from signs of character.
     
  7. sam_solo26

    sam_solo26 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2008
    Messages:
    494
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    267
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Far Corner of the Universe
    Honestly, the value of attractiveness varies for me, and a lot of it depends on what I want at the time. I'm a very visual person, so when I'm looking for a quickie or something, it rates very high. I want to feel immediate lust for the person. At the same time though, deceit and narcissism and lack of confidence really turn me off. If I'm looking to hook up and find an incredibly attractive person that has those qualities, things had better happen within 30 minutes and there had better not be any talking lol.

    But if I want a long term relationship, attractiveness isn't my top priority at all. I'd rate intelligence, passion, and sense of humor above it. In some cases, I've talked to people I didn't find all that good looking and my desire for them built up as we continued conversations. Even their physical attractiveness increased. Rationally, I knew their looks hadn't changed (all that much), but my lust for them did. When I saw them, they actually looked better.

    That being said, I'd still have to find them physically attractive on some level. I'm a guy, and I'm not too different when it comes to the general biological predisposition toward physical beauty. My penis needs to go up at some point, and to my knowledge that doesn't happen with just an attraction to personality.

    Btw I love the photos in your gallery! :)
     
    #7 sam_solo26, Oct 6, 2009
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2009
  8. Stephenmass

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2008
    Messages:
    1,886
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    73
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Boston
    While I will admit to first impressions (damn he's hot -wonder what he is like) if I approach him and talk to him and all that comes out is "shit" I will immediately lose interest.

    Like others though, there have been a few times where someones initial attractiveness didn't catch me but when I got to know them a bit, I found them more fun to be around and found myself finding attractiveness in what I initially didn't find attractive.
     
  9. Enid

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 3, 2008
    Messages:
    4,402
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    181
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    My home is wherever reality seems elastic and the
    I used to be more weighted in favor of mental attraction; now I place essentially equal emphasis on both physical and mental attraction.
     
  10. D_Petherick_Poundlouder

    Joined:
    Jun 10, 2006
    Messages:
    1,064
    Likes Received:
    0
    I don't think I'm shallow, but my dick does.
     
  11. Countryguy63

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2006
    Messages:
    14,488
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,446
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    near Monterey, Calif.
    Verified:
    Photo
    Well, now I feel that I need to clarify.

    I was answering from the "first sight" aspect. I am initialy interested in attractive people. I have found though that some of the people I have met via work, Club activities, or other avenues were interaction with them was by necessity rather than choice, that depnding on their personality, I would find myself becoming attracted to them as I got to know them better.

    On the same line, I have met people who initially were attractive to me, but once there personality and attitude was apparent, dropped off the scale dramatically.

    So, I still say that I am visual in attractions initially, but that it's not as high on the importance factor if the personality isn't there also.
     
  12. B_mitchymo

    B_mitchymo New Member

    Joined:
    May 11, 2008
    Messages:
    4,706
    Likes Received:
    12
    Location:
    Rugby, England
    I am VERY visual. It does make me feel shallow. I never care about a guy's body shape or dick size etc but the face has to be attractive to me.
    However, there have been a few guys that have personalities that seemed to react very well with mine and good conversation and a joke here n there is powerful so i've been attracted to guys sexually that initially did'nt arouse my interest.

    Visual attraction is good for finding a fuck-buddy but not necessarily a life-partner.
     
  13. DiscoBoy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2009
    Messages:
    2,706
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    On a first glace, I'll gawk, lust and fantasize.

    Beyond that, the visual is perhaps what least attracts me about a person. As long as a person has a face that's cute in one way or another, then I'm good. They absolutely need to be able to hold up a conversation and have an actual sense of humour. A confident, almost cocky personality makes up for the visual in many cases as well, so if a person walks with a certain air about them, then I'd be even more lenient with the visual.

    Just be a cocky, humourous guy who doesn't shut the fuck up, and all is well.:biggrin1:
     
  14. greatdickismydrug

    greatdickismydrug New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2009
    Messages:
    531
    Likes Received:
    2
    Interesting thread.

    My answer:
    Extremely. In fact, my senses play the largest role in determing which males I am attracted to. I don't care how nice or smart a guy is anymore. Been burnt by too many "nice", intelligent , guys who didn't fit the bill in other ways. Now I just go for what turns my senses on. No regrets that way.

    Visually there are some things that make me hot instantly and other traits that are an instant turn-off. I won't bore you with the details.

    Olfactory-wise I do not like the smell of cologne but love the smell of a clean man. Some men emit pheromones which are irresistible. Strong cologne masks that. I don't do men wearing cologne anymore.

    Auditory- Some male voices make me nuts. Fiance #1 did that for me. To this day the sound of his voice makes me WEAK. I prefer quiet men especially, in bed. I don't mind sex noise but loud talking in bed turns me cold.

    Taste- some men just taste better than others.

    Touch-the right touch is something that cannot be taught and is the most elusive of all the sensory pleasures to get right.

     
  15. Contour

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 24, 2006
    Messages:
    227
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    9
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New Zealand
    Verified:
    Photo
    These two by far would buckle me at the knees, though once buckled, I would throw him over my shoulder, take him to my room, ecetera..:wink:.. Olfactory/Auditory.. I call them my caveman instincts :biggrin1:, lol.

    I am attracted to man that knows his own masculinity. I don't have a 'type' per se, which makes me one hell of a perve, though a very refined, descreet one. So essentially, ones personality makes them more attractive to me than their physical attactiveness, due to the fact that the personality makes me physically attracted to them. Don't worry, I'm confused too lol
     
  16. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2007
    Messages:
    11,912
    Likes Received:
    44
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York City, by way of Marblehead, Boston and Ge
    All of this is why I love you.
     
  17. cbrmale

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2008
    Messages:
    1,442
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    15
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canberra, Australia
    Visual in as much as a person has to be attractive, but what really turns me on is a person's underlying personality. There's nothing lovelier than a natural smile, or a pleasant nature, or just a nice person. A lovely voice, tone and accent, is a big turn-on for me too. This is my attraction for women, of course.
     
  18. SilverTrain

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2008
    Messages:
    4,582
    Albums:
    8
    Likes Received:
    404
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    USA
    Physical attractiveness is much more important to me than I'd like it to be, unfortunately.

    The good news is that, if there's someone whom I begin to favor due to their personality, they often become more physically attractive to me.

    C'est la vie.
     
  19. B_am12388

    B_am12388 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2008
    Messages:
    640
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Newport Beach, CA
    I'm more of a personality person. If I don't like their personality, it just won't work, I don't care how good looking they are. I'll just use them as a sex object and then never talk to them again.
     
  20. B_Hung Jon

    B_Hung Jon New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2007
    Messages:
    5,008
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Los Angeles, California

    This is an interesting topic to me also. I'm glad you brought it up. I feel I'm quite visual, at least when I first meet a girl, but then if there isn't some additional aspects of her personality that I'm attracted to, we don't seem to hit it off. The opposite is true too. I just posted a blog about how women and men view each other. But I made it specifically about penises, and how women and men view them. Here's the link:

    http://www.lpsg.org/blogs/hung-jon/women-girls-experience-cocks-different-3858/
     
Draft saved Draft deleted