average penis - wife no orgasm

Discussion in 'The Healthy Penis' started by largeteeja, Jul 17, 2007.

  1. largeteeja

    largeteeja New Member

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    Hopefully someone can help me. I'm extremely frustrated. I have what I would call an "average" size penis (6.5 inches, erect, bone-pressed, 5.25 inches in girth when erect). My flaccid size is pretty small - only about 3 inches or so. This is a totally accurate measurement.

    I've never had sex with anyone except my wife and when we have sex, it seems she isn't really what I would call "aroused" much, and she claims that she has never had an orgasm and doesn't know what one would feel like. The fit seems relatively tight, maybe my technique is just crappy - I've tried everything - she seems to not like it when I stroke her clit and she seems to only "tolerate" me inside her - no groaning, no gasping, not so much as a peep out of her.

    I love her and I would give anything if I could give her an orgasm. What the heck is wrong with me and/or what I'm doing wrong?

    Help me please.
     
  2. burns1de

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    Maybe there's something wrong with her and not you...

    Just sayin'.
     
  3. Wyldgusechaz

    Wyldgusechaz New Member

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    This is the kind of wacky stuff that makes the LPSG more fun than the *Beast* roller coaster ride in Ohio.

    First off you aren't small. Ever have sex b/4 marriage?

    Tolerate? Yikes. If this is true it isn't your cock.

    U can't make this stuff up.
     
  4. snoozan

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    you need to talk to her about this very frankly. does she masturbate? if not, that's the best way to learn about your sexuality and orgasms. do certain things turn her on? does she have any sexual response at all? if not, she needs to see a doctor and probably a therapist. was she ever abused or raped.

    this doesn't sound like it's you.
     
  5. Kenyth

    Kenyth New Member

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  6. snoozan

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    for what he's describing, that stuff ain't gonna cut it, i guarantee.
     
  7. Kenyth

    Kenyth New Member

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    Well for me, it just sounds like his wife is frigid, so if you don't try that product you dont know. Some people do need a bit of help to become more sexually active.
     
  8. Lampwick

    Lampwick New Member

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    Wyldgusechaz:

    I'm sure that LargeTeeja feels better that you find his problem 'wacky.' At least someone is getting some amusement from it, apparently.

    LargeTeeja:

    Here's another angle to explore. Is your wife on birth control pills? Some of them are pretty devastating to libido. My SO changed birth control pills and her libido, formerly healthy, disappeared. She wound up going off the pills entirely and after awhile, her libido returned to normal.
     
  9. largeteeja

    largeteeja New Member

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    Didn't think my problem was "wacky" either. Just plain depressing.

    Yes, my wife is on birth control pills - maybe that added to the problem, but this problem existed before the pills also. We used to be more sexually active in the past also, but even then, she never had an orgasm.

    Is it possible that she is physically unable to have an orgasm? Is that possible? All her parts seem to check out okay when she goes to the doc... wish I had some answers...
     
  10. Wyldgusechaz

    Wyldgusechaz New Member

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    I will back down from my high horse but this just doesn't ring true. I am hardly bigger than he but I can promise I have never had a woman just lay there without a peep when I am in her, EVER. I defy any woman who has the least attraction to her man to just lay there without a peep when he is sticking a cock of that size into her, especially when he says its a tight fit. If she were bone dry it would hurt and if she were wet she would certainly not lay there without a peep.

    At face value there must be some really really deep seated issues going on that will need to be worked out with help. And there was no idea of this b/4 tying the knot?
     
  11. dolfette

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    are you doing enough foreplay?

    does she like you kissing her body, massaging her skin, licking her cunt?

    do you look her in the eye, kiss her, tell her she's beautiful and that you love her?

    is she wet enough to enjoy sex? have you tried adding lube?

    have you tried a vibe on her clit?

    do you need to talk over feelings of sexual guilt that her parents/church may have given her?

    stop trying to get an orgasm out of her. it's pressure she doesn't need if she's not even relaxed enough to enjoy sex yet.
     
  12. largeteeja

    largeteeja New Member

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    We use lube, since she doesn't get really wet most times. And believe it or not, I fell in love prior to having sex with her for the first time. I thought it would get better with time. I thought wrong.
     
  13. dolfette

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    been here & done that!

    which is why i asked if there was any guilt issues she had to talk out.
    switching off like that isn't uncommon at all.

    so you're wrong :tongue:
     
  14. largeteeja

    largeteeja New Member

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    She likes me kissing her, doesn't like me licking down there, though. Yes on the looking her in the eye, kissing her, telling her she's beautiful & I love her. She isn't usually very wet - by the way, does that mean she isn't aroused? We do use lube.

    the vibe on the clit thing - tried it, she didn't like it.
    I never have a voiced a concern over her not reaching orgasm to her personally - I thought that would do more harm that good. I don't know...
     
  15. Kenyth

    Kenyth New Member

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    Not trying to add to the depression, but is there a chance that your wife could be a closet lesbian?

    I mean Im pretty gay, but I have been with a few girls, and I must say the enjoyment from girls when Im pretty much fully gay is just so different from a guy.

    Maybe if she is a lesbian, then at least you know its not your fault, and if you still love each other, you can help her understand better and maybe work towards a non sexual relationship.
     
  16. dolfette

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    has she had any bad experiences?

    or were her parents or church very judgemental about sex?

    it could be hormonal but it's more likely to be emotional.
     
  17. Wyldgusechaz

    Wyldgusechaz New Member

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    I don't chase threads around but did you not post that no man had ever given you an orgasm?

    What little I know about women can be verified but I do know this, usually sex is tied to some extent to emotion for women. Not deep seated love but some degree of attachment. A woman who just lays there, without feeling has some serious issues going on as you just said. A woman emotionally shut off to her husband is troubled.
     
  18. largeteeja

    largeteeja New Member

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    Her periods have not been regular since she started having them as a teen. That's why the doc put her on birth control pills - to help her have regular monthly periods and prevent cancer. Is that hormonal perhaps? and could that be one of the causes? She generally has had no inhibitions about her sexuality and no guilt of any kind that I know of. Parents/church not judgemental about sex.

    Don't think she's lesbian, not in the least.
     
  19. largeteeja

    largeteeja New Member

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    Wyldgusechaz - maybe I was too dramatic on the "not so much as a peep" comment. She isn't vocal at all when we have sex, but she does breath harder.
     
  20. dolfette

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    is she depressed?

    depression is a big sex killer!
     
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