away from home..all mixed up

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by awa5226, Feb 1, 2009.

  1. awa5226

    awa5226 Member

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    hey everyone,

    i am away from home and will be for a couple months traveling and stuff..i have a good buddy of mine back home that i have known since junior high school. We even graduated together and went to the same college where we lived together our first two years. This past summer our close relationship got a little crazy due to the fact that during the year prior to me leaving i came out to him. he was totally fine with everything. well then this summer we would spend literally every day with each other, talking and texting each other everyday. He would spend the night frequently in my bed with me, until about mid summer when we started to spoon. At first it was all me and then it slowly progressed to full on spooning and touching all night, even the next morning. Our legs would touch, I would hold him, etc. Well after a few months of this and this crazy relationship I said "does the spooning thing in bed and stuff bother you" and he said no because we were best friends. So the point of all of this is that I would want nothing more than to take things farther, but I don't want to lose my best friend if I'm misreading the situation.
     
  2. bigtwin

    bigtwin Member

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    in my experience, limited tho it may be, str8 guys don't spoon no matter how close the friendship.
     
  3. Gnashin Teefe

    Gnashin Teefe New Member

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    what happens when you are spooning and one of you pops a boner (every male gets random boners during the night)? what about morning wood? has masturbation ever happened while the two of you are together?
     
  4. awa5226

    awa5226 Member

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    i mean yea morning wood happens and stuff. Nothing sexual has happened as of yet. There are points in the morning when he like pushes me off and stuff and then there are times when its all good, and this has happened both sober and drunk. Alot of our mutual friends refer to us as being a couple and we both laugh it off. Its just a really hard to read situation
     
  5. Eboomo

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    I would say I have to agree with this. I think he has at least a bi side if he goes for this kind of thing. Good luck mate I hope it works out as it sounds like you really like this guy. :) Please keep us updated.
     
  6. Ickday

    Ickday Member

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    I don't think he's completely straight. I had a friend like that (well, not physical) last winter/summer. We would chat and stuff, and it was usually somewhat sexual. When I came out to him, we started to make more gay jokes and the like, and a lot of times I'd say 'sigh I wish' after implying something between us, and he even said it a few times (pretending to joke lol) and turns out he was bi too! We had a lot of fun.

    Sounds like your situation has a lot of potential to be very hott. :D
     
  7. awa5226

    awa5226 Member

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    hence the mixed up part. We dont really talk that much now that I am gone. Once or twice a week at most. Its a complicated situation I mean knowing what he knows and allowing that stuff to continue just makes me wonder.
     
  8. CUBE

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    He is not so straight..and if he is...he is keeping you from finding a lover to have a COMPLETE relationship. You are so going to get hurt...and will because you plan on going after him and won't listen to any of this.
     
  9. reallyhot

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    So who was in the back and who was in the front...
    and did that ever change?
    ie: was he spooning you from behind as well?
    and did he get hard and stay there?
    Or grind his boner into your butt?
     
  10. jeff black

    jeff black <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    Regardless of the labels, if you two enjoyed each other's company, that should be all that matters.

    The next time you see him, allow him to initiate this spooning thing. If it works, you can continue to see if he enjoys anything else, maybe lowering your hands until they are closer to his cock (or grinding against his cock lightly at first if he's spooning you).

    Or do the whole face caress in the position and see if he responds. If it starts to really bother you, ask him calmly and politely how he feels about what you are doing. Ask him if he'd like you to continue/.
     
  11. awa5226

    awa5226 Member

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    thank u guys for your responses. They are really helping me think through this situation. Every single one is helping me figure this out in some way. Please keep them coming:smile:
     
  12. Gnashin Teefe

    Gnashin Teefe New Member

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    do you sleep with underwear on or off when spooning? does your morning wood ever end up between each other's ass cheeks?
     
  13. Branleur49008

    Branleur49008 New Member

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    My best friend is straight as an arrow (trust me on this one..there's not a gay bone in his body) and has never had a problem with me being gay. We are very demonstrative in that we hug just about everytime we see each other, we sometimes snuggle up to one another when on the sofa and watching TV, and when we have taken trips together and shared a bed, we have spooned.

    He's what I'd call an attractive man, but I've never really looked at him in a sexual way. It's actually sort of creepy to think about doing anything with him sexually, in the same way it would be sort of creepy doing something with your brother or something.

    It works out great for us. I get to have a genuine friendship with another guy without sex and lust getting in the middle of things and complicating it. He never had a father figure in his life, so on some level he feels like he's getting platonic, non-sexual male intimacy he never got growing up. He has a beautiful wife and a couple of kids and is a complete horndog...heterosexually.

    It may be out of the ordinary, or it may be more common than I suspect - I don't know. All I know is that it works for both of us, and it is a very fulfilling friendship. If you think you can have this sort of friendship with your buddy, then go for it man. But you're going to have to be good with leaving sex out of it for it to be successful if he is indeed straight.
     
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