Being Gay With Oral Herpes

assas1234

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Unfortunately, I recently got herpes (hsv-1) from kissing some stupid asshole who had it and apparently didn't realize he had it. Sometimes I wanna cry just and am scared to touch anything or anyone because I fear of accidentally passing it on. And I know people will look at me as disgusting now. So, I was just wondering how does one even come to feel confident or even approach ever dating again while having herpes?
 
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LPSG Simon

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I dont think that many people really get down on others for getting cold sores. Most people who get it get it way before they are adults.

Just dont expose your mouth or saliva to others when you’re having an outbreak. This includes sharing drinking vessels, makeup, etc.... Also, ask your doctor about as-needed valtrex. If you take it as soon as you start to feel like you are getting an outbreak, you can pretty much skip them.

If you’re not having an outbreak, or feel like you are about to have one, there’s basically no issue.
 

winesthel945

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Most medical providers familiar with sexually transmitted infections do not consider anything other than an active outbreak any cause for concern, primarily from a question of whether you find it painful or unsightly. As noted above, most people are exposed to oral herpes (HSV1) in their youth, and most statistics suggest that >90% of people are exposed by they time they are age 40 -- and as is most often the case, they will have no symptoms or only a single outbreak.

In Europe, oral herpes is barely considered an STI and even in the US its considered both so ubiquitous and such a non-event that no medical providers will routinely test for herpes unless you're having some larger issue that they need to figure out. It's considered highly likely that most people will have either have it, have had it, or will get it. It's just that ubiquitous.

Don't worry about unless it's causing you physical discomfort... in which case your doctor can give you meds (noted above) that will reduce the outbreak.
 

lextech

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Get a script for valtrex, and dont expose others if/when you are having an outbreak/ coldsore.

The worst part about it really is that it's on your face, so you feel like the whole world knows. It'll pass and you'll move on. Keep the purple pills handy for when you feel one coming and no play for a couple days then.

It sucks, but your not alone, as a lot of people have the same problem.
 

malakos

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My partner of 8 years has oral herpes, and I've never gotten it. From what I gather: just don't make out when there's no outbreak, and the risk of passing it on is essentially zero.

Actually, viral shedding of herpes simplex occurs even when there is no outbreak (though it occurs in the same location). As winesthel945 pointed out, the majority of carriers of the virus never experience symptoms. So, in mixed couplings where one experiences outbreaks, but the other never does, it is more likely that one is an asymptomatic carrier, than that the partner with an active case never passed the virus on to the other (it's even likely that the asymptomatic partner had it from beforehand, given that most are already carriers by the time they reach adulthood).
 

cantaloupe

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Epidemiology of herpes simplex - Wikipedia

40-80 + % have been infected. It is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, use aciclovir cream at the first signs of symptoms and it may never fully bloom again.

I think I get an outbreak multiple times a year but aciclovir cream and taking zinc, vitamin C and vitamin D has helped immensely.
 

LPSG Simon

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Epidemiology of herpes simplex - Wikipedia

40-80 + % have been infected. It is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, use aciclovir cream at the first signs of symptoms and it may never fully bloom again.

I think I get an outbreak multiple times a year but aciclovir cream and taking zinc, vitamin C and vitamin D has helped immensely.
Also a lip balm with sunblock in it, especially at the beginning of summer as well. Sun exposure to the affected area is a known trigger for an outbreak. Sunblock lip-balm totally helps.
 

Swallowu

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Yup. A lot of people carry it and don't know it. Same goes for HSV2. Given the prevalence of oral sex, HSV 1 and 2 can be found in both locations (oral and genital), and its not uncommon for guys to get HSV1 on their cock. Don't worry about, but if it bugs you, just let your potential partner know you sometimes get cold sores. Odds are they will too.
 

tito21

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My partner of 8 years has oral herpes, and I've never gotten it. From what I gather: just don't make out when there's no outbreak, and the risk of passing it on is essentially zero.

Why you gotta spread misinformation like that? That’s harmful!

Just don’t make out when there’s no outbreak? So, you’re encouraging people to make out when there’s an herpes outbreak. That’s how you get herpes.
 

LPSG Simon

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Why you gotta spread misinformation like that? That’s harmful!

Just don’t make out when there’s no outbreak? So, you’re encouraging people to make out when there’s an herpes outbreak. That’s how you get herpes.
I think that's probably a type-o.