I'm like, girl-next-door cute. I'm never the hot one. I like looking at myself; definitely not upset with my appearance. Others seem to appreciate my appearance too. But I'm always cute or pretty. Never hot. When I'm told I'm sexy, it usually has more to do with my personality than anything else. It hasn't bothered me. I really didn't even notice until I was reading another woman's posts here years ago, in which she was complaining. I like being the smart one. The hilarious one. The honest one. The bold one. The confident one. I like being the one who gets shot done. I don't have to be the hot one.
Have you really never been complimented on your appearance? Never ever? Never a "You look nice today," nor a "Wow! Don't you clean up well,"? I always think everyone looks nice at a celebration. So. Not even on special occasions?
I met my husband online in a chat room. He always said he was ugly. He said women didn't even look at him. I always felt kind of sisterly toward him. Then, one day he showed me himself, from his ribs up, on cam. I was floored. I could never feel sisterly toward him again. My attraction was instant. It was so far from what I expected. The first few times I expressed attraction and tried to get him to agree to a date, my heart raced. I was so nervous. To me, he was HOT. My friends agreed he was handsome. I see people watch him when we are out. A woman at his job asked him out a few months ago. (We don't wear our rings.) Maybe nobody actually does come up to him, usually, and tell him he looks good. Maybe. But we've been to parties where other women complimented ME on his good looks. All these years later, I can see he's not the same, but he's still handsome. He still thinks he's ugly. He really thinks this.
Are you really sure you're ugly? To my observation, really ugly looking people are about as rare as exceptionally good-looking people. Are you sure you just maybe don't see the signs that people are happy to check you out?
I read this back to myself, and it doesn't sound quite how I intend it, but I don't know how else to ask. I assure you, and hope you will believe, there is no meanness in my intentions. I'm really interested in your experience.