I guess this can be called the essence or extension to the previous "Yelling out: Harder!" and tits&compliments threads, when I get to the deeper argumentation. Let me start with a non-surprising confession: I like being the one in control in bed. That doesn't mean I can't find anything about positions that don't have me on top of the guy, it's just that my feelings are heightened when I know that I hold the reigns and set the terms. I can't say that it is impossible for me to let go, but in bed I just can't do so, not before the first orgasm. After that, I usually get more relaxed, but when the trek to the next climax starts, I feel that urge again to take charge, and set the pace. This has nothing to do with domination or subordinance, for me, it's in fact more subtle. I am no fan of screaming "Fuckin' tear my fuck-hole open, or I'll shred your ass", even less than I am of men who spouse this attitude in their sexual habits. As I have mentioned in the Yelling thread, the use of language and eye contact is fun to me, to control him and thus control the pleasures I can get. Not that guys have complained about this, here is where the second thread ties in, how manipulating compliments can be in their effect on men. Admit it, guys, if you are being told that you're a great lover, in a gentle, purry voice, by a woman you have made climax and who looks sexy lying next to you, is flattering, isn't it? And the reaction of many guys is an urge to surpass themselves when it comes to the next ride. Am I exploiting guys' weaknesses? I think so. Is that a bad habit? I never have the feeling that guys leave my bedroom feeling unhappy, or that either of us has a reason to feel bad about that. That's why I publish this issue: Do you use any means like the above, and what do you think about them?