Being "just friends" after sex

Discussion in 'Sex With a Large Penis' started by B_Think_Kink, May 16, 2008.

  1. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    What do you guys think, is it possible to be just friends after sex? stories, comments, suggestions, etc. Lets hear it.
     
  2. Pendlum

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    I think so. I wouldn't know from experience though, but if they had a strong bond before they had sex I think it is possible. Actually I've heard some stories of girls losing their virginity to a really close friend for that exact reason.
     
  3. OCMuscleJock

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    totally possible...i have quite a few friends that I've fucked around with. If people are mature *not age wise* then they can deal with being either.


    Friends with benefits are BEST! :)
     
  4. B_Artful Dodger

    B_Artful Dodger New Member

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    Yeah, its possible. I know people who have managed it. But I don't think its for everyone.
     
  5. lucky8

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    i've successfully ruined a couple friendships that way...
     
  6. D_Steve_Blough_Jobs

    D_Steve_Blough_Jobs Account Disabled

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    Yes,
    I think it is possible but rare.
    What do you think kink????
    Are you facing something like that???
     
  7. maestro071

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    I think it's possible if both partners have honest intention to be friends. My problem is/was that usualy I consider them friends, they claim the same, and then we end up in bad again... I don't mind having sex with ex partner (I always like sex), but problem is that girls usually after that start to develop emotianal attachment (relation) which predents problems in keeping the friendship... Something like this...
     
  8. B_sugarandspice

    B_sugarandspice New Member

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    Yes, hopefully he won't mind the cats following him around when he's with her ,Tuna Britches!
    LMAO
    Fishbasket!!
    :haha::haha::haha::kabong::hitwithrock:
     
  9. spunkyboy2008

    spunkyboy2008 New Member

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    Yes, of course. I'm still friends with one or two guys I've had sex with. We were friends before, which I think makes a difference. I'm also friends with an ex girlfriend too. The only difficulty was that my boyfriend was uncomfortable about it at first.
     
  10. _avg_

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    It's tough. It's insulting, even. It's a direct commentary on you as a lover. She likes you but not the sex; she would rather take her chances with a stranger than have sex with you again. And if it's not a direct commentary on you as a lover, it's a commentary on you as a person; no amount of good sex will ever let her enter a relationship with you.

    How do you make peace with that?

    I'm trying, but it's tough.
     
  11. earllogjam

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    Nope, sex is the quickest way to end a friendship.
     
  12. ManlyBanisters

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    But _avg_ that's in a situation where one of you wants more than firends and the other doesn't. Of course it happens all the time that people get imntimate with different ideas of 'what happens next' in mind. Maybe she went in to the intimacy with you assuming it was going to be a one night / short term thing, and thought you were in the same place. It isn't necessarily an insult at all - certainly not a critique of you as a lover!

    I had several friends who I had sex with one or twice, or several times, and then went back to being just friends with. (Though I don't like saying 'just friends' because that implies friendship is a lesser thing without the fucking - it isn't, it's just different). These were guys (mainly) I spent a lot of time with and got on really well with. In the situations I am thinking about both the other person and I knew that we were not going to wind up dating. The friendships stayed as close and on roughly the same level that they ever were. The only problem was that other friends (if they knew about it) would generally assume there was more to it than sex between friends and those people would react differently to both of us - but mostly a simple explanation set that straight.

    I think honesty is the key. If a situation comes up with a friend where you can take the step of going to bed with eachother or not, be honest, with him/her and yourself. If you think there is a chance you have fallen for / might fall for this friend you need to tell him / her that. If you know you just want the physical closeness and fun of sex and are not interested in a relationship then tell him / her that too. And you need to know the answers to those question for him / her too. If you are both coming from the same place and expecting the same things sex will not ruin your friendship - it'll just be a really nice memory of a different kind of intimacy that the two of you share.

    The trouble I ran into was when I started a serious relationship with someone else - I don't see lying as a good thing so when it came up I told him which of my friends I had slept with. He couldn't bear to be around those guys or have me be around them without him. Catch-22. I chose to give up being friends with those people for the sake of that relationship. I kind of wish now I hadn't, cos I went on to marry the guy and it didn't work out. But that has got a lot more to do with the insecurities of the man I got into the relationship with than the friends I fucked. They were totally happy for me when I started that relationship because, at the time anyway, it made me happy and they were my friends.
     
  13. DC_DEEP

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    Haha, ThinKink, I can't wait for Lex to chime in on this one. I know what he will say!

    It is, of course, possible... with the right person. It takes a degree of emotional maturity and honesty that's not all that common, and both people have to have a healthy self-image.

    I think what usually "ruins" it is one or both parties feeling "obligations" of how they think others think things should be, rather than the two people deciding for themselves the constructs of their relationship. (Yeah, that sounds awkward, but read it a couple of times, and it will make sense.)
     
  14. vergax

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    It is possible, but it takes both parties to know exactly the boundaries of the friendship.

    In my experience, I have remained very good friends with ex gfs, since sex is an important part of my relationships, if they don't end bad, I see no reason to avoid sex if we keep the attraction but experience tells us we are not compatible as a couple.

    My best friend was my first serious gf, until this day we speak almost on a daily basis, and when we visit each other's cities, we normally have great sex. Our agreement is that if we are single or free, we can fuck, there is no denial of our objective physical attraction, we trust one another and we know exactly where we stand.

    We can have sex with anybody, as long as there is emotional maturity to know what it means to the friendship. But everybody is different, so what works for me, normally it is not workable for others.
     
  15. Primal_Savage

    Primal_Savage New Member

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    My 3 closest friends were best buds before we even started playing around with each other and long before 2 of them got married. So from my vantage point, I'd have to say anything's possible.
     
  16. QuiteOne

    QuiteOne New Member

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    I've never fucked around with an established friend, but I've had plenty of hookups that turned into friendships. I'm in a monogamous relationship now but still keep in touch with many of my old fuck-bud's. I have no trouble turning off the sexual aspect of the relationship. (Age probably has something to do with it.)
     
  17. Mr. Bungle

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    Absolutely, it's definitely possible. I got to be really good friends with a woman and about 2 years later, we started dating. We only lasted a couple of months, and after that we only sporadically kept in contact, maybe once ever few months or so. But we've been talking much more lately and are back to how we were before we started going out. We both admit that dating wasn't the best move, but now we're okay and talking regularly. She's a cool, down-to-earth girl, and I'm glad we're back to being friends, the way we should have kept it. Of course, if she wanted a night of sex here and there, I wouldn't complain!! As long as we're both aware it wouldn't lead back to the unstable relationship we had when we were dating...
     
  18. thorshammer

    thorshammer New Member

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    I have 6 girls Ive known since middle school. Ive had sex with all of them. I only dated 2 of them, the other 4 its only been sex. With 2 of them (not the ones I dated) I have had a lot of sex, alone and with other guys/girls involved over the years. There has never once been an issue of jealousy and we're all in our early to mid thirties now, thats 15 plus years of casual sex and we're still all close friends. Actually one is married now and so Ill never be with her again aside from a divorce and her husband doesnt know and I act like Ive never been intimate with her around him and she doesnt worry about him finding out.

    That being said I met a girl at a bar about a year ago and it was just casual sex for a few months, there was never any commitment or leadon or anything and then she suddenly went berserk when she found out I had been with someone else and she nearly went 'stalker' on me, that was pretty crazy.

    I dont know if Ive been extremely lucky with the 6 girls Ive grown up with and this other girl was more the norm or if my friends are the norm and this girl is an exception. I lean toward the latter.
    The moral of the story is, it is possible and it is fun!
     
  19. Principessa

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    For me? No, absolutely not. For you it might be just fine.

    Though you know I have to add, "doubt means don't!"

    To quote Greg Behrendt, "It's Called a Break Up, Because It's Broken." Why and how could I be friends with some one that decided I wasn't good enough for the long term? :confused:

    That said, it appears easier for same sex couples, especially gay men to do this, than hetero couples. The only time I have seen it work between hetero couples is in a divorce where there was shared custody of young children and no cheating by either spouse.

    This is exactly what I was talking about above. Men tend to just fuck w/o feelings entering into it.

    That is because some but not all women find it difficult to separate sex from emotion for extended periods of time.


    I shall reiterate; that is because some but not all women find it difficult to separate sex from emotion for extended periods of time.


    :wtf1: This is one of those times you should have kept your mouth shut sugarandspice since you clearly have nothing of worth to contribute. :12:

    Why try? Seriously, what is the point in what is clearly agony for you?

    Right you are Earllogjam. :cool: Welcome back to LPSG, you have been gone a while.


    As I mentioned previously, that is pretty much something men who fuck men do. Since you are bi-sexual how many of your female sex partners do you share the same FWB status with?
     
  20. ManlyBanisters

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    NJ - honey - you know my thoughts of you are fluffy and wholesome (mostly :naughty:) and my regard for you is high - but I am so sick of reading that, be it from you or anyone else.

    Questioning something, wanting to think about the pluses and minuses, wanting to have other people's opinions is not only natural but it is bloody sensible. Are the proponants of 'doubt means don't' seriously of the opinion that if you feel the need to question something at all then you shouldn't do it? Bollocks - bollocks on toast, in fact. I think this phrase is overused - if you have examined something and questioned it rationally and you are still unsure (have doubts) then yes, I'd agree that not doing whatever it is is more sensible than doing it. But 'doubt means don't' as an answer to a 'what do you guys think' type question on this board is getting really old.
     
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