Being Raped

[Dr. Bubbles]

Good advise, Naughty. Again, very sound.

I apologize that he would have the gall to do so a horrific thing. You know, payback is a bitch and he will definitely have to answer to that one.

Glad that you are doing better and on your way to mending...

 

[lapdog2001]

Lots of good advice from those that, unfortunately, have been there.
TXGirl, HVet, Naughty, and bb, you have my utmost respect and admiration for dealing with your situations, and having the courage to talk about it here.

Somehow, someway your friend ineeds to get therapy, hopefully voluntary. I had a friend who had trouble dealing with certain things in her life and ended up assaulting me and a few other of her friends. She was hospitalized by the courts when she was arrested after assaulting another friend. She ended up spending a month or two in a mental hospital and then another month in a full-time therapy situation. She is much better now, but it would have been better if she saught help much earlier.
I was the 'supportive friend' in this case, and while that is needed, it is not enough.

In an email list that I belong to, hugs are indicated with ((()))

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((TXGirl, HVet, Naughty, and bb)))))))))))))))))))))))))

for sharing with us and

((((((((((((((((((((((((((Javierdude22, and friend)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

wishing you the best.

LapDog2001

 

[D_Barbi_Queue]

Thank you LD. ^_^

 

[13788]

TripodMillenium: I&#39;m sorry.... But if I heard someone making asinine comments like that to someone who had been assaulted or raped, I would have to pat myself on the back if I was able to muster enough restraint to leave them conscious.... Likely, if I heard someone make a comment like that to someone who had been through something so horrible.... They&#39;d end up nursing a bad black eye for a while..... <_<


ack.... *huggles all* Sorry... Don&#39;t usually get angry like that.... :mellow:

Just that I think anyone who&#39;d make a comment like that has a LOT to learn about life and what&#39;s real vs. fiction.... And it likely means their the type that only learn from the School of Hard Knocks......

Which is a damn shame.... when a person is that dense......

 

[naughty]

Tripod,Lapdog and BB,

Thanks guys. It was heartbreaking and I felt more violated by his response than by the assault itself.

BB,
Girl&#33; You took the words right out of my mind, heart and mouth.I cringe for the man. God will judge and reward him for his behavior. It may not be him it may be a lovely young daughter of his one day and he will have occasion to look back and ponder.....

Tripod darlin&#39;,
Your response is the difference between a "real man" and a creature who has (dubiously I might add) been born with the equipment. I would not have said the things he said to my worst enemy. For a man who is so obviously endowed with great intelligence ( an all Ivy educated lawyer) ,He must have left his heart some where along the way.I am just humbly thankful to God that I got that wake up call then. Who knows I might have in another situation married him and been the victim of cleverly hidden verbal and physical abuse. I never knew such a cherubic face could hide such bile.

Lapdog,

Thank you for your kind words.I think we all appreciate your well timed and thought out sentiment.

Naughty

 

[13788]

relatedtonone256: I for one cant imagine the damage this must have done to him - he does need help - probably psychiatrist more than anything.

The fact is aside from encouraging him to seek this level of treatment you cannot do much to really "help" him.

As for prosecution; so long after the event it would be hard to collect the evidence that is needed - unless he went to the hospital soon after the event in which case the evidence may exist and the option of civil penalties is opened up.

Best of luck to him.

 

[Dr. Bubbles]

Thanks everyone for your kind words of support and encouragement.

Time has a way of helping get through things, as well as a strong support group. God and my family have been my backbone through that ordeal. Although I still cringe when faced in uncomfortable situations (at least in my mind), I know that life goes on and that I must be a support for others who&#39;ve faced or are facing similar situations. For that alone, I have been able to be strong. Additionally, support and the kindness of people like yourselves have been a blessing as well.

Hopefully others who have been there have been able to juggle their emotions to handle their situations. Talking about it is actually the best therapy, at least for me anyway.

Blessing to all... and thank you....

bb

 

[13788]

Javierdude22: Thank you so very much BB, Naughty, Texassgirl...and all others. I can imagine how much courage it must take you to write down your experiences. I can only imagine...and then even slightly only...how this affects your lives.

Ya know...lately....I&#39;ve come to realise how much scum there is on the face of the earth. This is not me being depressive, but me being real, no point in sticking your head in the sand.

I&#39;ve come to realise with all this, and your stories, how many people are going through this. So few really let others know. I knew my mom was abused and raped several times...but I thought she was one of the few very unlucky ones...of course that is not so. In a weird way I can imagine it does give comfort to know your not alone in this. And then the reactions of the surrounding people...like with your ex husband naughty...like Tripod said...he would be eating through a straw for the next five years if he had said that in my presence. Sometimes the world seems like a mad freaky place...dang..

The simple fact is...that a 5 minute uncontrollable surge of lust in one person, causes the lifelong disablement of the other person in many aspects of their lives. If there is any justice at all...and I do believe in that....those people will get theirs...someday, somehow.

Your advice is very helpfull...I just hope he will somehow see that therapy is a good idea...and not something only freaks do (in Europe, therapy isnt as widely accepted as normal, as in the US). But lets face it, if you dented your car...you see a repairsman...if you dented your body...you see a doctor...if someone dented your mind...you see a therapist.

Thanx yall...seriously..

 

[naughty]

Javier,

Thank you for being the kind considerate friend to him that you are.I am are at some point he will be able to thank you fully for all of your support. As for the &#39;gentleman" that was once in my life I must say that I was fortunate enough not to have married him but only to have dated him. Thank you for your reaction to an unfortunate encounter.

Naughty

 

[jonb]

Well, Javier, the US is like Brave New World. Especially now that so many kids are on Ritalin just because kids are bored in school now, which in turn is because school quality has declined.

As for your friend&#39;s case, rape victims typically need counseling; it&#39;s really hard to deal with. But it requires a good deal of tact.

 

[Afemenineboy]

There is NOTHING that LOVE can't heal!

Try that...from the bottom of your heart.

Love, Javier...

 

[Afemenineboy]

But remember one thing...DO NOT create any expectations for yourself. It is NOT YOU the one who can help him to heal...it is LOVE!...and Love, expects NOTHING back.

Good luck!

Afemenineboy@yahoo.es

 

[Afemenineboy]

There is NOTHING that LOVE can't heal.

Just remember one thing: It is NOT YOU the one who can't help him to heal...it is LOVE and LOVE doesn't have any expectations. You can be there just to transmit this love.

Good luck and don't worry...it will be OK!

Javier...

 

[Afemenineboy]

There is NOTHING that LOVE can't heal!

Just remember that you can be there just to transmit LOVE but your are not the one who is gonna help him to heal. It is just the LOVE comming from the bottom of your heart.

Do not create any expectations for yourself and it can be easy, but it can be also difficult...but LOVE is patient!

Good luck, Javier...

 

[Afemenineboy]

Sorry for writing the same message a few times...some how I didn't see that it was comming to the place I wanted...Now I see....

All the best!

 

[Gillette]

You do know that you're giving advice on a three year old occurance.

Nice advice perhaps, but a little after the fact.

 

[dolf250]

You do know that you're giving advice on a three year old occurance.

Nice advice perhaps, but a little after the fact.

I started reading it, thought it seemed somewhat familiar, and looked at the date. As you said, there is nothing wrong with the advice... I just am starting to wonder why all of these OLD thread are being brought back.:thinking: