Bi Guy, Confused by Sexual Conversation

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Storage, Apr 4, 2009.

  1. Storage

    Storage New Member

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    So, it's 3 in the morning, I'm chatting online with a "buddy" of mine. As usual he asks how my sex life is going. I tell him average, nothing special.

    Blah blah blah...then he types some shit about fucking a bunch of boring girls who don't seem to know how to really screw.

    Too bad, I tell him, you gotta find some girls who can really GO...Did she at least blow you?

    His response: Yeah but she was only decent.

    Now, I must stop here to let you guys know that this friend of mine knows that I've been with men and women and knows from previous conversations that i LOVE to suck cock, it's what I get off on with another dude.

    So, "Decent?" i ask. What does THAT mean?

    "She didn't deep throat me, barely swallowed." Then, "Alot of girls don't deep throat me, I'm too big."

    How big, I ask, genuinely curious, but also, well, a tad turned on.

    "Really thick, 8 plus" he tells me.

    Now, I gotta say--this seemed like an interesting way for a 23 year old str8 guy to describe his junk. Something about it sounded, well, sorta sophisticated, but maybe cause I'm older I just thought that was the case.

    Suffice to say, the conversation then devolved into him telling me how he loves rough sex, likes to take control, hates when girls can't handle his girth and length is a DOMINANT lover, loves getting deep throated, doesn't think of it as real head unless he's deep throated.

    I mention how i love to deep throat, I'm good at it, love the look on the face of a guy (str8 or gay, I've been with both) who's never experienced it, etc.

    He then tells me how horny he is right that moment for a Deep throating.

    Hmmm, I type, you're putting crazy images in my head, dude. I'm getting horny to suck some dick myself, but that's not gonna happen. Guess i gotta wait to find some cock to suck tomorrow.

    "Why wait," he types.

    Uh what? I type, "Cause no one's here with me now, def not someone with a thick 8plus"

    Now, you guys should know that this dude is typing about three blocks away from me, so I think, hmmm, is he offering HIS thick 8plus to get some good head AT THREE IN THE MORNING?

    So I say, "I'll deep throat you, I won't tell anyone if you won't tell anyone."

    Then he types: "Sorry I can't help you. Not about you telling anyone, just that I'm completely into women."

    Oh. And the conversation ends shortly after that. Leaving me very confused. Now, I don't waste a LOT of time trying to figure out the mixed (missed?) signals, but what was this about? (And I don't mean in the "is he gay?" type way--I don't care, really, and it's sorta not the point.)

    A coupla days later I told this story to a str8 buddy of mine, who told me this: "Dude you completely could have sucked [X] off but you missed the beat."

    According to him, the beat I missed was forcing the issue. He says I was supposed to, on some level, "beg" for the cock, let him know JUST how much I wanted his cock. He says since this guy loves to be in control, to be "DOM", he needed me to push the issue and behave much more submissively than just putting it right there on the table like that.

    So my question to you guys, after this long post is this: Do you agree with my buddy? Did I miss a beat? And though I completely believe that there are str8 guys who sometimes enjoy head from gay or bi or other str8 guys, does a guy who "only likes women" have convos like this with a guy he KNOWS is a BI guy who LOVES to suck cock? And I guess, more ridicuously, should I make any other overtures to get at that thick 8 incher????:redface:

    Thanks...
     
    #1 Storage, Apr 4, 2009
    Last edited: Apr 4, 2009
  2. sam_solo26

    sam_solo26 New Member

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    I think there's a lot of information missing to make such a judgment. Let's say you begged for the guy's dick. There's no guarantee that you would have gotten it that night, or ever. He could simply have been leading you on to see how much you wanted him, how much power and desirability he could have, and then simply cut you off when it got boring or he got tired.

    Someone has to have certain qualities to stray into homosexual sex (especially if they consider themselves heterosexual). A high level of curiosity, a willingness to explore, an iconoclastic personality, a desire for thrill and rebelliousness, thoughts and fantasies of homosexual sex, and other environmental factors all may influence a person's choice to engage in it. I don't know this person, so I can't say if any of these apply. Could you have actually given him head that night? Possibly...or possibly not. You'll have to give us more information about who this person is.
     
  3. Storage

    Storage New Member

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    Great points, Sam.

    I guess I was just interested in whether this sort of conversation seemed odd to any of you guys out here.

    Begging's not really in my repetoire of moves :eek: and the idea of being with him was never really in my brain until that conversation happened. I mean, i think of him as attractive but never really got many vibes from him one way or another about his possibility for indulging in m2m sex. I guess I was just most struck by that "why wait?" question, and the emphasis on going into suck detail about his sexual appetites, interests, and description.

    That said, he's a college student, extremely confident guy, jock, Italian, known for NEVER having a regular gf, just a variety of (very wiling) sex partners.

    He knows about my sexuality just because we've had other conversations about a host of things--life, politics, music, sports. He's confided stuff in me about his family life etc. I'm open in general about my sexuality, not interested in hiding it from anyone, and in a rather long deep conversation once about our relationships with exes, I told him about me.

    So there ya go. Don't know if that fills in any gaps but I was just curious what you guys thought about this exchange.
     
  4. sam_solo26

    sam_solo26 New Member

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    Well it doesn't seem odd to me that he'd say that. He could have been teasing you, or throwing out the possibility to see if you would because he saw the opportunity, or many other reasons. And guys generally talk about sex frequently and with detail, so if he sees you as a friend (and possibly as "one of the guys") then he'd talk about what's on his mind (sex apparently).

    That said, I don't think you would have to beg if you were interested. Dominant types love the chase, the challenge, especially when it's easy to get what they want. You've said you're interested, so now he knows you are. All you'd have to do is bring up the idea at opportune times, maybe by talking about his sex life and how stale it's been, and then deny him the satisfaction. Bring up an excuse, or say that you don't get with straight guys. If he is indeed completely into women, he won't pursue any further, because the pay-off isn't enough. He knows he won't get sexual satisfaction if he's with a guy, because the serious idea literally may give him shivers. But if he's open, which he may be considering his large sexual appetite, then he'll see not only the chance for sexual satisfaction but also a challenge that he can say he overcame. It can't be too much of a challenge, or the pay-off won't make up for the effort put into pursuing you (or should I say your mouth). It's a lot easier to do this if you actually spend time with him, like at a bar. Then you could play off the 70% of communication you don't get when you're messaging on a screen. In any case, good luck man.
     
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