Big Shlong Leprechaun

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by B_Jordan85, Apr 30, 2011.

  1. B_Jordan85

    B_Jordan85 New Member

    Apr 11, 2009
    Likes Received:
    New England
    A guy walks into public bathroom. while he is taking a piss, he sees a leprechaun using the other urinal next to him. he cannot help to notice that this leprechaun has a 12" dick.

    he says, "sorry sir but I can't help to are such a small guy AND your Irish, how do you have a dick like that?

    Little green man answers, "I'm a leprechaun matey, I can wish for anything!"

    Guy jumps at opportunity, "I want a big dick too, will you grant ME a wish?"

    So the Leprechaun responds, "sure thing matey, just as long as you do something for me as a fair trade."

    "YES, I am willing to do anything for a monster schlong!"

    "very well then matey! I would love a little oral, sir."

    In disgust, the man shuts his eyes, shrugs his shoulders, and goes to work... Moments later after the deed is done, the man washes his mouth out and sighs, "glad that's over, I can't BELIEVE I did that!"

    the Leprechaun smiles, but before he leaves the bathroom he says over his shoulder, "I can't BELIEVE you thought I was a Leprechaun..."
    #1 B_Jordan85, Apr 30, 2011
    Last edited: Apr 30, 2011
  2. D_Kitten_Kaboodle

    D_Kitten_Kaboodle Account Disabled

    Apr 24, 2010
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    hahahahhaha....... I don't know any big dick jokes, or I'd post one here.. this is funny :D
  3. D_GlennFeckless

    D_GlennFeckless Account Disabled

    Oct 28, 2006
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    Variation on that theme:
    Man walks into the loo at McSorenut's Pub and spys a wee little man dressed all in green at the porcelain. Being a respectful Christian man he'd never deliberately look down "there", but the richness of the little man's endowment nearly knocked him over when he turned to zip up big Willie.

    "Praise be the saint's little feller! How'd you come to be so blessed!"

    "Well, my good man," he replies with a twinkle in hes green eye, "we leprechauns are all equipped like fine young ponies."

    Just then our hero realizes the opportunity at hand, throws himself against the door blocking the way out and cries, "I've got you! Now you have to grant me three wishes!"

    "Well, good sir, you do, and I will. But, my friend, we leprechauns are unionized now and have our rights as well. You need to grant me one wish in exchange for the three you've rightfully earned."

    "Union! What's this land coming to? Alright, alright. My first wish is to be as mightily blessed in the britches as yourself."

    "And so you will awake at the crack of dawn."

    "Second, a vat of Bushmill's finest 21 year malt that'll never run dry!"

    "A man of good taste and good thirst. It is yours."

    "Thirdly, I'll take that pot of gold I know you have stashed away."

    "Ah, my dearest treasure. It is waiting for you in your porch room at home."

    The newly rich, hung drunkard smiled like a new father and turned to the door to race home when the little man smacked him in the bum and says, "Not so fast, my lucky new friend. I still get my wish, or all three of yours are null and void."

    "Of course, of course. But be quick about it."

    The little man unzipped again, and said, "Pull those trousers down, young man, bend over and let the leprechaun have his way!"

    "What? No! I'm a Christian man! Well, the gold, and the whiskey, and my, my, my won't the missus be pleased? Alright. We lock the door and I take this to confession on Saturday with you never saying a word to anyone!"

    So the leprechaun eases his mighty endowment into his very lucky friend and starts riding, and grunting, and laughing out loud, "So how old are you, my good man?"

    "Ugh, ouch, unhnhnhnh - 37"

    "Praise the saints! 37 years old and still believin' in leprechauns! Ah, ha, ha!"
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