biSEXUAL but not "bisexual"

CarolinaLiar

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So I have been in a relationship with the same girl for about 3 years.

Before we dated, when I was younger, I had some sexual experiences with guys.

I have masturbated regularly to both gay and straight porn, depending on my mood. Sometimes switching between the two during the same session.

My gf cheated on me early in the relationship (we're still together) which opened up the door for me to cheat (in my mind).

I have met guys for sex via Craigslist several times because I was very horny and wanted dick, but there was usually some type of disfunction when we end up "doing it." i.e. hating their smell, feeling unattracted to them in person (even though I was horny for their cock shots). I usually don't cum 90% of the time.

I met one girl on the internet and ended up having sex with her. We fucked for a good hour, and I was soo horny, and came sooo much, it was amazing. Much better than I do with my own gf, at least after the first six months of dating her. and MUUUCH better than when I hook up with guys.

I have never found a guy attractive in the same way I find girls attractive. Getting nervous, fantasizing, having feelings of love. The only time I'm attracted to guys is when I'm horny and I see their dick on the computer screen. Never had a crush on a guy I've known. But I regularly want to hook up with one when I masturbate to gay porn.

I love trans porn too, about the same amount as gay and straight.

I have a 6x5" dick and some issues about being on the smaller side... being a dissapointment to women. Although I never care what the guys i meet on craigslist think...

What would you say about my sexuallity?
 

D_Parkinsonne Partycocke

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You are who you are. That's pretty much that!

And six inches is nothing to be ashamed of! I am seven, and am happy with what I have! Let's put it this way, just be happy that you have a dick! I'd rather have a dick than a pussy anyday... LOL! Pussies seems to have a lot of issues that us guys will never have with our dicks... So be proud of what you've got bro, and use it!
 

D_Sherman_Shuttlebottom

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I wouldn't worry too much about trying to nail down a label. I agree that the cheating thing is a bigger issue than your sexuality. In regards to sexuality, I find your description really familiar. I go back and forth on gay and straight porn; I end up watching gay porn more because it feels a little more forbidden and dirty, but yet sometimes I am compulsively drawn to only straight porn and gay porn does nothing for me. I'm also, as you seem to be, mainly attracted to cocks and pretty much indifferent to men as full sexual beings--they don't turn me off, but it's the cock that does it for me. Show me a hot guy with his shirt off and I'm mildly appreciative, but never really inspired to jerk off. Show me a thick fleshy cock and a man or woman getting ready to suck it or get fucked by it and I'm turned on as hell. For myself, I am cool with the bi label, as both "straight" and "gay" feel wrong for me. But the only serious emotional relationships I've had are with women, and I kinda doubt I will have a lasting relationship with a man in my life, though I wouldn't rule it out.
 

CarolinaLiar

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I wouldn't worry too much about trying to nail down a label. I agree that the cheating thing is a bigger issue than your sexuality. In regards to sexuality, I find your description really familiar. I go back and forth on gay and straight porn; I end up watching gay porn more because it feels a little more forbidden and dirty, but yet sometimes I am compulsively drawn to only straight porn and gay porn does nothing for me. I'm also, as you seem to be, mainly attracted to cocks and pretty much indifferent to men as full sexual beings--they don't turn me off, but it's the cock that does it for me. Show me a hot guy with his shirt off and I'm mildly appreciative, but never really inspired to jerk off. Show me a thick fleshy cock and a man or woman getting ready to suck it or get fucked by it and I'm turned on as hell. For myself, I am cool with the bi label, as both "straight" and "gay" feel wrong for me. But the only serious emotional relationships I've had are with women, and I kinda doubt I will have a lasting relationship with a man in my life, though I wouldn't rule it out.


Yet you describe yourself as more straight than gay. Why is this, if you don't have feelings for guys.

I'd like to think of there as being two spectra:

The one dealing with emotional attachment and feelings in general:

Gay Bi Straight

And the one dealing with sexual enjoyment:

Homosexual Bisexual Heterosexual


I'd describe myself as straight and bisexual.
 

CarolinaLiar

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Also, I don't find anything wrong with my cheating. As long as she never finds out, it doesn't hurt me... and as long as I never find out about what she does, it doesn't hurt me.

Monogamy was birthed from jealousy.
 

D_Sherman_Shuttlebottom

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Hey, the cheating is your business: I do think if monogamy isn't your thing, there's the whole polyamory scene, which rejects monogamy and is great for a lot of people. As for my sexuality, I think I'm emotionally straight and sexually bisexual, but I'm cool with bi as a general label for me personally because I can't rule out an emotional relationship with a man.
 

cdunstan1

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"I have met guys for sex via Craigslist several times because I was very horny and wanted dick"

Man there's your mistake. Try meeting guys at a gym or even hang at a gay bar. If you see something you like, tell him whats going on and ask if he'd be into it. He'll either be flattered or blow you off.

Don't be hung up on str* or bi. Do what you want. Be honest and BE SAFE.
 

jorpollew

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"I have met guys for sex via Craigslist several times because I was very horny and wanted dick"

Man there's your mistake. Try meeting guys at a gym or even hang at a gay bar. If you see something you like, tell him whats going on and ask if he'd be into it. He'll either be flattered or blow you off.

Don't be hung up on str* or bi. Do what you want. Be honest and BE SAFE.


I totally agree. It sounds like Craigslist will always be a gamble, no matter how horny you are. So, before questioning yourself too harshly, wait until you have a good sexual encounter with a guy that you're really attracted to (and one that doesn't have body odor!).
 

dotadone

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Quake2121 it seems to me that you are "normal" soo many "straight" guys will submit to almost anything sexually all the time waving the het flag, pecker checking and playing ass grab. Guys are hot but it's all visuals for me. The smell or touch just f's it all up. but a female can be like pizza when its bad it's still pretty good. I am a straight man with an open mind. Get hit on a lot, tried guys but not for me. both kind of porn is a turn on though.
 

bosatbk

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Enjoy yourself and be you. At the end of the day you have to live for yourself. There is nothing wrong with liking both. Sexuality is a sliding scale and a lot of guys mess with guys as well as girls but will never admit it. There is something that you can get from each sex and each sex does something experience wise completely different. As long as you protect and respect yourself you are all good. Now with the cheating... my only comment is maybe that is not the person for you or maybe you are not ready for a long term committed relationship yet. Take some time out for yourself to figure it out.
 

hud01

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Also, I don't find anything wrong with my cheating. As long as she never finds out, it doesn't hurt me... and as long as I never find out about what she does, it doesn't hurt me.

Monogamy was birthed from jealousy.
Wrong attitude. You say that the sex with a girl outside of your relationship was much better. Why are you with your gf??

Edit: I just looked at your pic. You show your cock at its smallest possible size. You have issues.
 
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whattheduck

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i am actually experiencing the same problem at the moment. i have experienced both men and women. i have been able to get off with a woman every time, but there have been numerous instances where i am unable to cum when i am with a guy; i end up looking at him and thinking "sure, he's attractive, but not sexy." i dunno, i don't really have a major desire to be with a guy ever again, but i do like both gay and straight porn. i feel guilty for liking the gay porn because i do consider myself straight. what do you guys think? (also, i think a lot of guys enjoy gay porn a lot more than they say they do for fear of having that label or stigma attached to them)
 

Enid

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I'd like to think of there as being two spectra:
The one dealing with emotional attachment and feelings in general:
Gay Bi Straight
And the one dealing with sexual enjoyment:
Homosexual Bisexual Heterosexual
I'd describe myself as straight and bisexual.
Right, heterophilia / homophilia / biphilia all refer to attraction & love between the appropriate genders. To most people sexuality is so inseparable from love that the terms heterophilia et al are rarely used while heterosex / homosex / bisex are in general use.


I can't really get on board with the cheating thing, but that is defo your business. It's not that polyamory or polysexuality are disagreeable ideas to me, it's deceit that is bothersome.

But at any rate good luck. I wouldn't worry about the labels thing.
 
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