1. Male Bonding etc

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    Blessings - My definition: Those attractive attributes which you possess but which you have had little or no part in cultivating.

    On this site the main thing is the penis, above average and, thus, outstanding. However, I think we can agree that there are other blessings, not all of them having to do with appearance, that draw the attention and admiration of others. Furthermore, we can probably generalize that the attention from all such blessings can be mixed.

    My experience, without getting specific, is that I cannot take pride in those things which I did not personally accomplish, but I often enjoy the attention they bring me... and, yes, I have used them on occasion to my advantage. While I try to be unassuming and reserved, it is often enough clear that others admire one attribute or another. Sometimes they are so bold as to say so to my face, but more often it is a certain nervousness or flirtatiousness that is hard to miss.

    In and of itself, that sort of thing is not that big a deal and can be managed with some grace. My problem is that I don't always know if it truly is one of THOSE attributes, and sometimes I get a stare or a remark and wonder if it is dismissive or even from revulsion. Yes, I confess, I occasionally have bouts of insecurity, and I suspect that other "attractive" people have them also.

    Do some people ever truly get so confident about their attractiveness that they NEVER question why they get noticed?
     
  2. B_Hung Jon

    B_Hung Jon New Member

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    I think that young peeps use their attractiveness in immature ways. It's like a flirting game. Hopefully by the time they (we) mature some we begin to appreciate other people for other aspects of themselves like their personality or relationship qualities. I know way too many peeps who seem super confident about their attractiveness who don't have dates very often. It has to be a combination of things about a person that makes them interesting to others.
     
  3. Male Bonding etc

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    HJ, I tend to agree, and I find myself expecting to get slammed for being immodest. I also know only too well how often I've thought someone "had it all" or at least was über attractive only to discover he or she had some habit or feature I couldn't abide. I suppose someone else could discover some ugly aspect of my person they found abhorent...

    It's not that I spend all my time trying to be liked, but as accustomed as I am to being liked, it still disconcerts me a little when it seems like someone has issues with me.
     
  4. dudepiston

    dudepiston New Member

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    I think there's a difference also between what nature gave you (it's ok to take pleasure in it, esp. if others like that feature about you) and what you have worked very hard to achieve......good relationships, perhaps a good physique (working at the gym), your talents & skills, your brain. :)
     
  5. Male Bonding etc

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    Well, yes, DudeP, I am all about building, cultivating, enriching, and improving those aspects of myself and my life over which I have some control. It is also a special pleasure for me when I know I have inspired others to expand their horizons similarly.

    It is my sincerest desire to move beyond superficial concerns and encourage others to do so as well. Nonetheless, response to human attractiveness, in all its many and varied manifestations, is as hardwired in me as it is in anyone else. It is a delicate maturation process that allows us to enjoy the attraction to nature's gifts and yet cherish the spirit behind whatever can be seen on the surface.
     
  6. Male Bonding etc

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    Anyway, I think I sidetracked myself a little with this thread. My intention was to point out that there are things that we are born with other than dick size or that come to us serendipitously which others admire.

    Does one not behave like something of a cad if one openly capitalizes on those things (including dick size)? Nonetheless, aren't we eventually aware that we are more attractive or wealthier or more politically or socially connected or have better taste in attire than others? So, we have to act oblivious even if it feels slightly disingenuous... not to mention the everpresent possibility that that there is someone else who's more whatever it is... or that whatever it is you THINK you are so much of is not enough or what someone else appreciates.

    I'll give a rather benign example. I've always been pretty good at math. Eventually, I learned that people don't always like to hear a solution shared before they've even grasped what is involved. So, now, when I am publicly doing something math related, I try to include humor or some connection to someone else's strengths so that it doesn't look like I am bragging about my math abilities.

    Perhaps we can all learn to casually and confidently use our blessings without constantly trying to rate ourselves and others.
     
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