Bottom concerns

Chuck64

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I would be shocked if this question hasn't been asked here before, but I couldn't find the post.

First of all, I don't do hook-ups, so my experience is rather limited. I can still (easily) count the guys all on one hand. They were all pretty close to average size, as am I. I'm pretty versatile. I enjoy all of it: top, bottom, oral, rimming - all the "vanilla" stuff, to steal from another post. My point: I'm not normally worried / afraid of bottoming.

I'm starting to get involved with a guy who's bigger than I've had before - pretty long (8-9"), and a little thicker than I've had as well. He said he's mostlya bottom. Fine - great! I want to be prepared for the time when he wants to top. Heck, I'm going to need to bottom pretty soon or it's gonna grow shut - it's been a while since my last relationship.

I know there are guys out there (maybe, a few on here) who would gladly bend over and let him take a running start. Even for average equipment, it takes me a fair amount of "warming up".

Mainly, I don't want to be nervous when the time comes. You all know how it can kill the mood. Guys - Put my mind at ease. Is this likely to be a problem?

Any advice - other than the obvious 55-gallon drum of lube?

I found a product called "anal ease" - some kind of numbing lotion. #1 - Does anyone know if it (or something like it) is condom-safe? #2 - I don't really care for the idea of being numb during sex. Has anyone tried something like this?

I'd particulary like to hear BBB2.5's point of view cause Day-um, you got skills girl. How did you learn to do that?

I'm sorry for writing a book.
 

D_Elijah_MorganWood

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You can urge him to use fingers: start with one, then two and when he gets to three he can probably fuck you, no prob. You can also loosen up with a dildo first. My BF is really large and even after 5 years I still have to go slow. I like him to rub the head back and forth across my hole first...it makes me hot.
 

Sabln7

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I can take a larger penis if the partner is on his back and allows me to slowly go down on his penis while in a crouching position facing him. I find that doing this allows me to take the long and thick ones. I have never had a problem as long as I do this and go slowly, use lots of lube, and warm up with fingers and or dildoes. And once it is in, he can get as wild and quick as he likes, and we can get in any position he likes.
 

tritonal

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Don't use anal ease. It'd be a great way to tear open your asshole and shit blood.
 

Lex

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Sabln7 said:
I can take a larger penis if the partner is on his back and allows me to slowly go down on his penis while in a crouching position facing him. I find that doing this allows me to take the long and thick ones. I have never had a problem as long as I do this and go slowly, use lots of lube, and warm up with fingers and or dildoes. And once it is in, he can get as wild and quick as he likes, and we can get in any position he likes.


I have found that this can work as well. Usually opening a guy up via rimming and him doing some finger play helps also.
 

Chuck64

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Thanks guys. I appreciate the honest info and quick responses. We're certainly going to take things slow and loosen up first.


:thanks:
:22:
 

B_DoubleMeatWhopper

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The brand of lubricant you use can be an important factor: they are not all created equal. Stay away from KY. It's fine for vaginal sex, but not great for ass piracy. My favourite butt lube is Wet Platinum. I'm sure others here will suggest other fine products.
 

D_Elijah_MorganWood

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DoubleMeatWhopper said:
The brand of lubricant you use can be an important factor: they are not all created equal. Stay away from KY. It's fine for vaginal sex, but not great for ass piracy. My favourite butt lube is Wet Platinum. I'm sure others here will suggest other fine products.
I'd listen to Jacinto. He knows how to shoehorn something huge in...
 

carter2006

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This is a quote from one of my own posts in the 'Sex with a new buddy' thread from a couple of days ago:

carter2006 said:
I had a similar problem with a seriously hung top once - the biggest I had ever taken. I wanted it so badly that when I couldn't take it first couple of times I got really stressed out and it just made the problem escalate. Eventually I took after much de-stressing, relaxation, foreplay and above all LOTS of lube (like nearly a whole bottle by the time we finished!) It was all worth the effort in the end though...
Another tip... My current partner who I've been with 2 years now had problems taking me at first and still has difficulty in many positions. Let him take control of how much is going in a how slow/fast. Get him to sit on your cock while you lie back and enjoy the ride! It gives him complete control to go at his own pace, and all you need to do is stay hard and reassure him. But do try not to touch his cock while he's getting used to having you inside him. Stimulating the cock during anal sex could cause his muscles to contract and make it more uncomfortable for him...
Good luck!

So, that's basically my advice! As much foreplay as possible to relax will help too.... Have fun and play safe :smile:
 

BBB2.5

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Chuck64 said:
I'd particularly like to hear BBB2.W's point of view cause Day-um, you got skills girl. How did you learn to do that?

I'm sorry for writing a book.
Ahhhhh...you really know how to make a guy feels all tingly.
:flowers1:
OK ...not sure how I missed this post...but here is my advice?
Practice, practice, practice...and if you haven't practiced...practice.

Seriously.... you must be completely comfortable with the objects of your affection (your boyfriend's dick) before attempting to bottom for him. There has to be a certain amount of trust when you wish to go beyond your limit. Most of us do have the ability to take more than we think. If you are willing to believe that you can or that you even want to, then it will NEVER happen. If you force it, and you are wanting it, then it will not be pleasurable for either of you. My best advice it to take it slow, use plenty of lube. Only go as far as you can. After all their are no laws that say you must take all of your sex partners dick the first time.

As you well know I am very capable of taking on some serious sized "objects of my affection". It took me many years of Practice and up sizing, before I was able to do that.

I am a proffesional...DO NOT attempt this at home .....:eek:

Just have fun with your new boyfriend and don't sweat the big stuff before it happens. Hell..I am a total bottom. I never want to top my Partner. Your boyfriend may feel the same way.
:wink:
 

Chuck64

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I should have sent in an update earlier. Thanks to the advice from this thread, my weekend was fucking awesome! (pun intended)

Thanks again for the advice and support!
 

Chuck64

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Sorry to be a tease (unless you get off on that, in which case, you're welcome)

Since you nosey queens want to know all my business:

I invited him to my place. I cooked pork tenderloin with roasted red potatoes and grilled green beans. I told him what you guys suggested. He said it sounded "hot" in a joking tone. Jerk. Anyway, that was followed by a very romantic dinner. He did the dishes while I took a quick shower. We sat down to watch a DVD, but I don't think we made it past the FBI warning.

After a make-out session on the couch, we went to my bedroom. We took turns sucking, rimming and fingering. He also used a dildo on me for a bit. We started with the position you guys suggested. I was all the way down with no trouble at all and it was 100% pleasurable from the very first second. Towards the end, since we already had the "toy box" out, he decided to play around with a vibrator while fucking me. That pushed him over the edge, and I wasn't far behind.

It was, without a doubt, the best sex of my life. I'm pretty sure he liked it as well.
 

BBB2.5

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Chuck64 said:
It was, without a doubt, the best sex of my life. I'm pretty sure he liked it as well.
OK....so you did take him? You gave us more information about what you made for dinner. What position was best? There were two choices given. You on top or doggie style?
Last question...are you now a bottom....:087:
 

Chuck64

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Sorry. Who said doggie style? I personally can't stand doggie style. I like to see his facial expressions. It's sooooo much hotter that way.

We started with him sitting down on the bed, straddling the corner, leaning back on his elbows. I was facing him and sat down on his dick. Like you said - most people can handle a lot more than they think they can. I took all of him.

After riding him like that for a bit, we rolled over with me on my back and legs up and spread out and butt up in the air. That's how I've always bottomed in the past, and it's still the best for me.

I've always claimed to be versatile and I still am. I think I can probably convince him to top when that's what I want. Most of the time, I don't really care who bottoms as long as we're doing it together.

As for the dinner description - I'm one of those take-it-slow, emotional guys. You won't get in my pants until at least the second date. The romance and foreplay are at least as important as the fucking. I know it makes for a bad porno script, but that's just how my brain is wired.