Bottom/Top

[RedScrotum]

Because this is "dumb question day" I'm going to ask. Does bottom refer only to anal sex, or is a bottom one who gives oral sex? i.e. using his mouth to bottom?

 

[jonboy239]

100% bottom here with no desire to top - even with my big cock.

There is an art to being a great bottom. I can take a larger cock with no problem and cum with no hands with the guy hitting my prostate.

 

[Bbucko]

Because this is "dumb question day" I'm going to ask. Does bottom refer only to anal sex, or is a bottom one who gives oral sex? i.e. using his mouth to bottom?

I have always used "top" and "bottom" when referring to anal sex. By that definition, I'm a total top. I tried during my teen years to find some pleasure in bottoming but never did. Last summer, I tried again with a guy whom I really trusted, but again, no dice.

I wish I could bottom, but find no pleasure in it whatsoever. Since I turned 20, I focussed on topping and have some mad skills, especially with an aggressive powerbottom.

Orally, "top" and "bottom" makes very little sense to me. I'm a fabulous cocksucker and an expert at deepthroating.

As to relationships, my partners have all been bottoms except for the first two, the second of which ended in 1983 (and in that relationship anal sex was taken off the menu). They were all quite satisfied by our sexlives. If any of them got a hankering for topping a three-some would take care of it.

 

[B_Italian1]

Because sometimes you love someone enough to do something you don't particularly like.

It's not a good idea to do something you don't like no matter how much you love the person. It leads to doing more and more things you don't like until you finally end up a miserable person; a people pleaser and a person that gets no pleasure himself.

Once again you're speaking about that of which you have no experience and making moral judgements for other people. Go back to your own bedroom and stop spending so much time worrying about what gays do in theirs.

I'm not making any moral judgements. Forums need all kinds of opinions so the reader can then make his/her own decision.

Or is there another reason you're so fascinated by gay anal sex? You are spending an enormous amount of time here preaching about the alleged moral and medical dangers of anal sex. I have never met a straight man who spends so much time worrying about what other consenting adults do in their own bedroom, much less trying to convince gays that it's wrong. There's a pathology to this sort of behavior and it usually means that your 90%/1% needs some serious readjustment to be even remotely accurate.

I am anti anal sex, gay or straight. The reason I focus on gay anal sex is because some gay men are conned into thinking that being a power bottom, agressive bottom or proud botton is a good thing. It's not. It's a power play that anal tops do to them and it's humiliating. The worst thing a gay man can say is "I've been complimented on my bottoming skills." I've seen that many times on here.

A lot of gay men are already depressed and have low self esteem,(self loathing is a term most often used in the gay community), and then they try bottoming and are complimented on it. And then they start feeling good about themselves. That's no way to feel good about yourself by pretending that your anus is a vagina. It's a male/female, dom/sub situation which is not good since both parties are men. For the most part gay bottoms are the ones getting STD's and HIV. How is that a good thing? The penetrative partner is less likely to get a disease and of course isn't going to suffer any rectal problems.

For example, the heroichomo website states:
"anal penetration is dirty, dangerous, and degrading. Dirty, because fecal material is always present in the anus and rectum;
Dangerous, because anal is the primary vector for most sexually transmitted infections, some of which, like HIV, are universally fatal, and others, like hepatitis and syphilis, are potentially fatal; and,
Degrading, because anal turns a man into a pseudo-woman......
Besides which, anal penetration isn't sex.
An anus isn't a vagina, there's no genital tissue in the anus or rectum.
So the "pleasure" in being penetrated is "psychological" -- which is a polite term for imaginary.
And because the anus isn't a vagina, and wasn't designed to be penetrated, it's easily damaged during penetration, leading not just to sexually transmitted diseases, but mechanical problems such as anal fissures -- which are very painful and difficult to repair -- and what gay men quaintly refer to as "leakage."


http://www.heroichomosex.org/FAQS.html


And this page explains more about the physical aspects:


http://www.heroichomosex.org/crw/frot/whatis.html

Sure thing. I'll make an appointment with a psychologist next week. I live a very happy life and I'm very focused on my own sexuality, but I also offer advice as do you and others.

It is completely wrong to assume that the insertive partner has dominance over the receptive, to say something like that as a straight man, in a thread about gay sex, shows you up to be the ignorant person that you have shown yourself to be time and time again.

Of course the insertive partner has dominance. He's the male and the other man is his female, or as some say bitch, pussy, mangina, etc.

I don't know what you base these pet theories on, if it is the website you mentioned it has a VERY one-sided view of sex between men, and comes across as bitter and hurt. What is good for those people who subscribe to that view is not necessarily good for anyone else.

That website is no more one-sided than all the other websites that promote dominant/submissive behavior.

It is in no way disparaging for any gay man to admit he likes to be a receptive partner, in any more sense that it is demeaning for a straight man to be told he has a good sexual technique... or that a woman can assume an assertive position in a sexual context. It is an assumption on your part, and as such indicates your attitude to gay men and their sexual choices-nothing more than that.

I disagree. A man admitting that he likes to be a receptive partner is a way of making himself feel loved, but not in a good way. As I stated in a prior post, I am the penetrative partner no matter what position I'm in when I have sex with my wife. Some called me sexist but there's nothing sexist about it. If you're a man and don't like vaginas then don't pretend that another man's rectum is your vagina.

100% bottom here with no desire to top - even with my big cock.

There is an art to being a great bottom. I can take a larger cock with no problem and cum with no hands with the guy hitting my prostate.

If that's what it takes for you to be loved, then I'm really sorry.

 

[Industrialsize]

I'm 100% bottom, my husband is 100% top, works for us going on 27 years, we moved in together when we were 20........trust me, no one feels short changed

 

[Lucky_Luke]

It's not a good idea to do something you don't like no matter how much you love the person. It leads to doing more and more things you don't like until you finally end up a miserable person; a people pleaser and a person that gets no pleasure himself.



I'm not making any moral judgements. Forums need all kinds of opinions so the reader can then make his/her own decision.



I am anti anal sex, gay or straight. The reason I focus on gay anal sex is because some gay men are conned into thinking that being a power bottom, agressive bottom or proud botton is a good thing. It's not. It's a power play that anal tops do to them and it's humiliating. The worst thing a gay man can say is "I've been complimented on my bottoming skills." I've seen that many times on here.

A lot of gay men are already depressed and have low self esteem,(self loathing is a term most often used in the gay community), and then they try bottoming and are complimented on it. And then they start feeling good about themselves. That's no way to feel good about yourself by pretending that your anus is a vagina. It's a male/female, dom/sub situation which is not good since both parties are men. For the most part gay bottoms are the ones getting STD's and HIV. How is that a good thing? The penetrative partner is less likely to get a disease and of course isn't going to suffer any rectal problems.

For example, the heroichomo website states:
"anal penetration is dirty, dangerous, and degrading. Dirty, because fecal material is always present in the anus and rectum;
Dangerous, because anal is the primary vector for most sexually transmitted infections, some of which, like HIV, are universally fatal, and others, like hepatitis and syphilis, are potentially fatal; and,
Degrading, because anal turns a man into a pseudo-woman......
Besides which, anal penetration isn't sex.
An anus isn't a vagina, there's no genital tissue in the anus or rectum.
So the "pleasure" in being penetrated is "psychological" -- which is a polite term for imaginary.
And because the anus isn't a vagina, and wasn't designed to be penetrated, it's easily damaged during penetration, leading not just to sexually transmitted diseases, but mechanical problems such as anal fissures -- which are very painful and difficult to repair -- and what gay men quaintly refer to as "leakage."


http://www.heroichomosex.org/FAQS.html


And this page explains more about the physical aspects:


http://www.heroichomosex.org/crw/frot/whatis.html




Sure thing. I'll make an appointment with a psychologist next week. I live a very happy life and I'm very focused on my own sexuality, but I also offer advice as do you and others.



Of course the insertive partner has dominance. He's the male and the other man is his female, or as some say bitch, pussy, mangina, etc.




That website is no more one-sided than all the other websites that promote dominant/submissive behavior.



I disagree. A man admitting that he likes to be a receptive partner is a way of making himself feel loved, but not in a good way. As I stated in a prior post, I am the penetrative partner no matter what position I'm in when I have sex with my wife. Some called me sexist but there's nothing sexist about it. If you're a man and don't like vaginas then don't pretend that another man's rectum is your vagina.



If that's what it takes for you to be loved, then I'm really sorry.

You appear to have some homophobia and sex-role issues. That's being polite.

 

[B_Italian1]

You appear to have some homophobia and sex-role issues. That's being polite.

Yeah, I've been told that before, and as I said in a prior post I don't think people actually know what homophobia is. If they did they wouldn't say that I was one.

 

[2322]

That's no way to feel good about yourself by pretending that your anus is a vagina.

Ahhh! There's the crux.

If gay men wanted vaginas they'd find one and fuck it. If I'm fucking a man, I'm fucking a man, not a woman. I don't want a vagina, real or imagined. I want ass. Unless you've done it, perhaps, it's impossible to explain. The dynamics of sex when fucking a woman and fucking a man are completely different.

 

[Bbucko]

You appear to have some homophobia and sex-role issues. That's being polite.

Italian978 is yet another incarnation of AndyA (who was banned). Same tired argument, same website, same inability to link properly...

Ignore him. Do not feed trolls or we'll end up infested.

 

[Bbucko]

Ahhh! There's the crux.

If gay men wanted vaginas they'd find one and fuck it. If I'm fucking a man, I'm fucking a man, not a woman. I don't want a vagina, real or imagined. I want ass. Unless you've done it, perhaps, it's impossible to explain. The dynamics of sex when fucking a woman and fucking a man are completely different.

Agreed...100%

 

[B_Italian1]

Ahhh! There's the crux.

If gay men wanted vaginas they'd find one and fuck it. If I'm fucking a man, I'm fucking a man, not a woman. I don't want a vagina, real or imagined. I want ass. Unless you've done it, perhaps, it's impossible to explain. The dynamics of sex when fucking a woman and fucking a man are completely different.

If you want to call having anal with another man fucking, go right ahead. It's not fucking and it's not sex. Only women get fucked. Yes you are a man, so don't pretend that another man's ass is a vagina.

Agreed...100%

Of course you would agree with that. You're on a constant search for new bareback partners.

 

[MurdockPSB]

The website in a nutshell:

"Dude, if we just kiss and rub our dicks together, we can still say we're totally straight, man. Dude, it feels good and isn't a gay thing at all! Dude, anal and oral sex make someone a pussy and can kill you, man. Dude, try frottage, dude! Oh yeah.. and if we say "dude", "bro", and "man" a lot, that makes us masculine and totally straight-acting... dude, bro, dude, dude..."

Wow... delusional... LOL

It's good to see how this has gone way off subject.

 

[Fillitup]

Yeah, I've been told that before, and as I said in a prior post I don't think people actually know what homophobia is. If they did they wouldn't say that I was one.

If you've been told this before, perhaps it should be deliberated on with some diligence, after all you are dealing with other peoples lives, but I suppose you wouldn't see it that way.

After all this isn't really the case, is it? You're not a Homophobe. No, you're much worse. Homophobe would be a compliment. You're one of those people that thinks its a sickness that can be cured. That with a little help from 'enlightened', 'loving' people such as you, we'd all be cured - Hallelujah!!

Walk a mile in these shoes you sad fool.

 

[B_Italian1]

The website in a nutshell:

"Dude, if we just kiss and rub our dicks together, we can still say we're totally straight, man. Dude, it feels good and isn't a gay thing at all! Dude, anal and oral sex make someone a pussy and can kill you, man. Dude, try frottage, dude! Oh yeah.. and if we say "dude", "bro", and "man" a lot, that makes us masculine and totally straight-acting... dude, bro, dude, dude..."

Wow... delusional... LOL

It's good to see how this has gone way off subject.

I don't think it's saying you can do all that and still say you're straight. If you read all the links it will make more sense. It's more or less saying that giving or receiving anal should not be identified so strongly with gay men as it has been. It's about equality and not making an ass a pussy, but it doesn't say gay men shouldn't have oral.

If you've been told this before, perhaps it should be deliberated on with some diligence, after all you are dealing with other peoples lives, but I suppose you wouldn't see it that way.

After all this isn't really the case, is it? You're not a Homophobe. No, you're much worse. Homophobe would be a compliment. You're one of those people that thinks its a sickness that can be cured. That with a little help from 'enlightened', 'loving' people such as you, we'd all be cured - Hallelujah!!

Walk a mile in these shoes you sad fool.

Give me a break! I'm worse than a homophobe? I never said gays need or could be cured. If you're going to talk about me, at least tell the truth.

 

[2322]

Give me a break! I'm worse than a homophobe? I never said gays need or could be cured. If you're going to talk about me, at least tell the truth.

No, you just believe that if gays have sex they should do so the way you think is moral and acceptable.

Once again, your fascination with what other people do in the privacy of their own bedrooms amazes me.

 

[Fillitup]

Don't you think we haven't heard this before? The argument doesn't make the slightest difference to any of us, including you.

It is our badge of honour, our pride. You're hate doesn't matter.

As I said, you're a sad fool... and I've wasted too much time on you already.

 

[B_Italian1]

No, you just believe that if gays have sex they should do so the way you think is moral and acceptable.

Once again, your fascination with what other people do in the privacy of their own bedrooms amazes me.

Gays are going to do whatever they want, but they also don't need to be tainted by what gay culture is feeding them day in and day out. What people do in the privacy of their bedrooms isn't so private anymore, is it? People write very personal things on here, and some even have their face pics. That's not private.

Don't you think we haven't heard this before? The argument doesn't make the slightest difference to any of us, including you.

It is our badge of honour, our pride. You're hate doesn't matter.

As I said, you're a sad fool... and I've wasted too much time on you already.

cya

 

[loggerheadtop]

On a prior post these bottoms were saying things like they are a proud bottoms, willing bottoms, or have been complimented on their bottoming skills. It's an awful way to think on oneself.[/quote]

Has it ever occured to you such opinions might reveal a deep-seated :wink: problem that is entirely yours, rather than theirs?

 

[snoozan]

this thread makes me want to scrub toilets and pop out a few more babies.

 

[huw ginnit]

Italian, when you get back from your Psychologist, do post for us their comments, you might want to print off some of these threads and perhaps discuss them with your therapist, what it is about Gay men and their sex lives that causes you to talk such shit?

I hope your getting the help you so obviously need. I'm sure we could contribute to your sessions, I have Paypal...other's might chip in!

With therapy there is a hope that you will, in time become a normal, well adjusted non-judgemental person, welcome in society.