Breaking a size issue with any potential girlfriend

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You were in an institution for obsessing about this. It sounds like you're still obsessing about it. Until you accept yourself, you wont be happy. It sounds like this is an issue with your own fears and insecurities.

I'd stop thinking about sex and dicks for a while if I were you. Why don't you just try and get along with someone you like...because sex is great, fun, and emotional. It can also destroy your life. And if you go in with this much fear, it wont happen for you.

Good luck sir, I wish you the best.
 

JacKNight

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Ok man.... Stop the madness... Just stop the fuckin' madness.


First thing don't try going after a woman right now.... PERIOD. You are in such a mental state of loopy that even if a woman does come along that happens to like you a little you're going to end up either chasing her away because you'll cling to her like she's the only island of hope in the whole damn ocean or she'll be someone with equally low self esteem issues and you'll make each other miserable. Or you'll end up some dominatrix gal's toy. Or something worse I haven't dreamed of..... But anyone here want to put money down and bet that it goes well... I seriously doubt it.

Now enough with the pessimism here is what you should do. Look into the world of those called Pick up Artists. Yes there are a hundred things you can say about these guys being shallow or whatever but the stuff works. And the reason it works is not because they give you any tricks or teach you to be manipulative. You need to start off ignoring most of the stuff they teach about picking up women to start because you aren't there yet. To start I would look up David DeAngelo and focus on his programs called Inner Game. Start with that it's the building block and right where you need to be.


Your biggest problem is you look at women and think that they look at us the same way that we as men look at them and nothing could be further from the truth. Think about your local community, have you seen a hot woman with a guy who was average looking or even below average and thought "How the fuck did he get her?" I'll tell you in most all cases it ain't because he's hung or a fat wallet which is the standard stereo type. Now on the reverse side how many times do you see a guy who is way up there on the attractive scale and see him with a woman who is just mediocre looking? Happens a lot less doesn't it? It's because women don't think the same as men... we aren't wired the same way.

Secondly I would say when your evaluating all the wonderful advice you're getting, as well meaning as it all is, look at where it's coming from. I had similar problems as you approaching women, it was for entirely different reasons, but I've had the same issues. And my women friends gave similar well meaning advice to what you're getting. But they didn't really know what to tell me because they just didn't get it... None of them had ever tried approaching a woman and getting a number. And yes anyone can imagine and suppose and try and guess but it's way better to go get advice from books from guys who have actually walked the same road you're on. Now don't get me wrong I have many women friends and there are things I listen implicitly to their advice on some things. I have friends I will call when I want to go shopping for new clothes... (buy her something and there are a lot of women who will love to go out and play dress up with you). I listen to them when I meet a new woman... I always run them by by lady friends just to get there overall view of her and I'm looking for signs of Jealousy on her part because if she's showing signs early on in the relationship I don't want anything to do with HER issues down the road.

Well I'm gonna leave with just this for now. basincreek if you want to msg me to ask questions you can do that. But I hope you go out and get some books and start working on yourself. Because sitting here on this forum having a few women pet on your ego with all it's self inflicted wounds is getting you no damn where.

To everyone else reading this I know I may come across a little harsh but that's the point. He's sat here on this thread for two weeks now in his self pity and hopelessness. At some point you have to wonder what a person's motivations are for keeping in that mindset. I could hypothesize but I think everyone here can do that for themselves.
 

basincreek

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So I almost asked out the gal at the shelter. I say almost because when the time came these thoughts flooded my head that I would be saddling her with my own inadequacy even if she liked the rest of me. Sort of like I'd be punishing her by getting her to like someone who will turn out to have something essential that's below statistical average. I mean she has the right to someone who's at least average girth....right?

Anyways, so I did nothing.

Then later I thought I might be crazy for thinking that way and knew that if I shared that I had done this you'll probably call me nuts. But, for better or worse, when the time came that was what I thought.



Bah, I don't know what I'm doing anymore.
 

SpeedoMike

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please don't decide for someone else what she does or doesn't like or want. how about asking the woman at the shelter to have coffee after you finish giving permanents to the poodles. that should be a non-threatening time for you both.

and... turn mind off turn heart on! it helps.
 

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So I almost asked out the gal at the shelter. I say almost because when the time came these thoughts flooded my head that I would be saddling her with my own inadequacy even if she liked the rest of me. Sort of like I'd be punishing her by getting her to like someone who will turn out to have something essential that's below statistical average. I mean she has the right to someone who's at least average girth....right?

Anyways, so I did nothing.

Then later I thought I might be crazy for thinking that way and knew that if I shared that I had done this you'll probably call me nuts. But, for better or worse, when the time came that was what I thought.


Bah, I don't know what I'm doing anymore.

Asking a girl out.
Scarey isn't it.

I hope no one is overly critical because we have not turned you into a pick up artist in 2 weeks.

Lots of guys break into a cold sweat when asking a girl out.
That is normal.
What is different in your case is the stuff going through your head.

Most guys wonder and are fearful of rejection - suppose she says no?
Will she be nasty when she says no? Laugh and think that it is so ridiculous that I would even let the thought into my head that she would ever say yes to me? Tell everyone I know that I might think she was in my league and I actually asked her out? And tell them I was such a dork when I asked her - they should have been there because they would have been rolling on the floor laughing. How she kept a somewhat straight face - she can't figure out.

Those are the things most guys think.

And then there are the ones who are most successful with women and don't think any of this. They just ask the girls out. And frequently the women say yes.

But you must be the only guy who chickens out because he is thinking about penis circumference statistics!

Ask her out.
Would you like to go get a cup of coffee after work?
There is a Chinese restaurant down the street I'd like to try. Want to go there with me for lunch? My treat.
There is a new movie with fuzzy animals that looks good. How would you like to go see it with me? Is Friday OK or would Saturday be better.

Do any of these things involve your penis? Except that it will be in your pants while you are doing these things?
Answer = NO!

First get the date.
You can still ask her and should.

and stop worrying about your penis :mad:
 

Titsdude21

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I have a male friend who is quite sim to you in size, not sure of his measurements....but he is a LOT smaller them me. Yes i have only fucked 2 girls, and he is on his 5th, all of them decent lenght relationships.

So many girls arent that worried about size, he is proof.
 

Pitbull

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So many girls arent that worried about size, he is proof.

There is a part of his mind that is in control and facts and sensible reasoning is not allowed in there.

The problem is in his head not in his pants.
When he can finally admit to this, then, and only then, will he be able to make progress.
 

JacKNight

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There is a part of his mind that is in control and facts and sensible reasoning is not allowed in there.

The problem is in his head not in his pants.
When he can finally admit to this, then, and only then, will he be able to make progress.

Much truth to that.... also the reason why I wouldn't recommend he run out and try jumping head first into the dating pool.... Every fail he will use as a reason to retreat further. This guy needs to work on himself... before he even thinks of dealing with rejection. He doesn't have his head screwed tight enough to take it... yet
 

basincreek

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But wouldn't it be selfish for me to ask her to tolerate my inadequacy? I can't help but think I'd always feel I'm punishing her by asking her to put up with something a quarter inch below average.
 

Pitbull

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But wouldn't it be selfish for me to ask her to tolerate my inadequacy? I can't help but think I'd always feel I'm punishing her by asking her to put up with something a quarter inch below average.

No.
Come on now.
You are being ridiculous.

Whatever you end up in a relationship with will be the judge - and not just of your penis. The whole package.

I'm not a statistician but is a 1/4 inch even statistically significant?

Punish?
Stop being so melodramatic.
 

Pitbull

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I am going to try one more time
(don't know why - my head is starting to hurt from banging it on the wall so much)

Maybe I am assuming too much about you.

Do you have any idea whatsoever about what a woman is looking for in a man?

All I know is some woman made fun of your penis and you have a friend with a large penis that uses women.

Is this the base for your conclusions?

Time to get the head out of the ass my friend.

Much truth to that.... also the reason why I wouldn't recommend he run out and try jumping head first into the dating pool.... Every fail he will use as a reason to retreat further. This guy needs to work on himself... before he even thinks of dealing with rejection. He doesn't have his head screwed tight enough to take it... yet

Maybe JackNight is right on this one.
Actually, he is right.
So don't jump in head first.

But time to stick a toe in.

Learn about women.
Go to the library and get some books
or go somewhere on the internet.
(And not the sex sites - Love romance and relationships)

Have you ever bothered to look at the dating sites.
(Some are totally free and you can hide your profile when you look)

I'll tell you what those women want
An honest man
A faithful man
One who loves them
That they can love back.

How do people figure that out?
Well they communicate.

And on these dating sites
There is no place on the sign up to put penis size
Hell if LPSG will let anyone join no matter how big their cock is then so will eHarmony.

I will tell you that some women are open to a lot of possibilities and other have pretty stringent criterion.
Just like in real life - even though it is the internet.

What might get you in the door?
Or knocked out of the box?

How old or how young you are?
How tall are you? (Some women will not consider a shorter man)
Smoke?
Drink?
Religion?
Race or Ethnicity
Kids - Want or have.
Education
Profession
Political Affiliation or lack therof
Income
Where do you live? (No one cares to drive 100 miles for a date)
Interests, hobbies.
Musical Tastes
Body Type, Activity & Exercise Level

NOT YOUR PENIS

Penis is not brought up on the dating sites.
And with good reason.
Women don't care.
In fact most want you to keep it in your pants for an unreasonable amount of time to show you are serious about a relationship and will agree to be "friends first"

So if you care to move on here and make some progress, don't mention your cock again.
I am not interested in your cock and neither are your potential dating partners.

Has the little light been turned on in your head yet?
If so then you are saying to yourself:
"Pitbull is right"

Time to move on to what women are really interested in.

Were you paying attention?
Honest & Faithful man to love them that they can love back.

Confidence without conceit or arrogance is more appealing than inferiority with self doubt.

You want someone with all the other little things so you can fit like two puzzle pieces.

So try to learn a little about women.
Start asking us relationship questions.

And stop with the 1/4 inch of penis already.
You are punishing us with it.
 

B_subgirrl

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Serious question Basincreek - are you in therapy? I honestly think you need to be if your sense of inadequacy can stop you from even asking a woman out, even after all we have told you here. I think your thoughts on this matter are deeply ingrained enough that we aren't going to be much help to you. There's nothing wrong with seeing a psychologist or other mental health professional. I will freely admit that I have a psychologist I see on a regular basis. I really think a professional could help your progress in a way that we on this forum can't help you. PM me if you would like to talk about therapy but don't feel comfortable doing so in public.
 

basincreek

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No I'm not in therapy...not anymore. It's expensive and I have a 113 year old house that is having water damage being repaired.

I suppose part of my feelings of selfishness stem from there being so many single men out there and so few single women. I'd hate to have to feel like someone "settled" for me when they could have easily held out and gotten someone much better. After all there are huge queues of available men for any lady that's looking.
 

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For someone who has measured his penis down to the millimeter and has statically calculated where his penis is on the bell curve, you suck at math.

Male to Female ratio approximately 50:50
Humans if not single usually mate in pairs (Just like Noah's Ark)
Is there polygamy where you live, which has nearly eliminated single females from society?

If not, then you are being called out on the bullshit.

Are you interested in changing your life and meeting women or do you just want to fail and reinforce your failure with worthless excuses?
 

nolbaby

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"Male to Female ratio approximately 50:50
Humans if not single usually mate in pairs (Just like Noah's Ark)
Is there polygamy where you live, which has nearly eliminated single females from society?"

that's very true. if you think there are more single men than women, you probably think so because you only consider a small percentage of women when you are taking count. if you are really picky and only care to even find out if 9 1/2's & 10's are single, then yeah, it is going to seem like 1/2 of women are taken, because 1/2 of THOSE women are!
you have to count the fat secretary, the hideous hippie librarian, the Pat who works in the elementary school cafeteria... etc etc
 

bid6555

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Basin you just have to find the right person. The reason I found LPSG is my wife made a comment to me a few years ago that I am kinda small. We were not fighting just talking about sex. I wasn't sure what to say. I never heard that one before and never really thought about size. For the past few years I have read everything I could find. I am high average or even above average at 7" long bone pressed and 5.5" mide girth. So even being above average or high average these issues I guess still exist. So it is best to not worry because even if you grew and inch both in length and girth there are still some that think that is small.

I guess my wife is a lucky girl

WR
 

B_subgirrl

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No I'm not in therapy...not anymore. It's expensive and I have a 113 year old house that is having water damage being repaired.

It's a shame, because I think you could benefit much more from speaking to a professional than you could from speaking to us. If you are still interested in therapy and it is just the cost stopping you, keep a eye on this thread that I started earlier tonight, and hopefully something will come up in your area:

http://www.lpsg.org/202039-access-to-mental-health-professionals.html


I suppose part of my feelings of selfishness stem from there being so many single men out there and so few single women.

As Pitbull (and others) said: it's 50:50.


I'd hate to have to feel like someone "settled" for me when they could have easily held out and gotten someone much better. After all there are huge queues of available men for any lady that's looking.

Surely you can see the errors in your thinking here, even if you don't really believe that they ARE errors?
 

basincreek

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For someone who has measured his penis down to the millimeter and has statically calculated where his penis is on the bell curve, you suck at math.

Male to Female ratio approximately 50:50
Humans if not single usually mate in pairs (Just like Noah's Ark)
Is there polygamy where you live, which has nearly eliminated single females from society?

2000 Census results shows that there are 117 males for every 100 females in my town. Over the age of 18 it is even more skewed with nearly 130 males to every 100 females. I remember that from a newspaper article a couple of years ago talking about why so many local men are getting mail order brides.

Basin you just have to find the right person. The reason I found LPSG is my wife made a comment to me a few years ago that I am kinda small. We were not fighting just talking about sex. I wasn't sure what to say. I never heard that one before and never really thought about size. For the past few years I have read everything I could find. I am high average or even above average at 7" long bone pressed and 5.5" mide girth. So even being above average or high average these issues I guess still exist. So it is best to not worry because even if you grew and inch both in length and girth there are still some that think that is small.

I guess my wife is a lucky girl

WR

Jesus, I'm an inch below someone who is still called small by women! :eek:

How could I possibly ask any normal nice woman to make such a sacrifice to try to get anything pleasurable out of what I have to offer? I just don't think I could do it to her. She has the right to be sexually fulfilled.

It's a shame, because I think you could benefit much more from speaking to a professional than you could from speaking to us. If you are still interested in therapy and it is just the cost stopping you, keep a eye on this thread that I started earlier tonight, and hopefully something will come up in your area:

http://www.lpsg.org/202039-access-to-mental-health-professionals.html

I'll keep an eye on that. Thanks.