Brotherhood of the male gender

[2322]

Shit! I was trying to keep SOMETHING secret.

There are a larger-than-average number of INTJs here and at the other place. We had a thread about this a while ago and it was very surprising. Maybe it's time for another one?

 

[B_henry miller]

Interesting. I wonder why so many.

 

[nubian]

I will just rep for the ENTJs by myself, then :tongue:

 

[B_Hung Jon]

Thanks for the response. I just wanted to comment on a few things.

Maybe, because you're gay, you will never know how wonderful it is to avert your gaze, knowing that doing so will help another man feel more comfortable with himself. I've had the experience of being in a gym shower and having good looking men enter the shower, and being curious about what this man has down below -- but rather than looking, I turned my back, knowing that doing so would make him more comfortable, and myself as well.

I don't mean to get all naively idealistic. But there is some level at which straight men do not objectify one another in the way that women do to one another and that gay men do to one another. It's very odd. On one hand, it would be nice to live in a society where everyone is so secure that when the well built young man enters the shower I could very easily look at his body without him being uncomfortable with that. But there's a level where the consideration of knowing that it would make him uncomfortable, and attempting to be considerate to him, is ultimately more important than actually seeing his body.

I'm probably going to anger some people with this statement, but I think that ultimately straight men bond in a deeper way than gay men. I recently read an article about sports psychology and behavior on the field. The writer, a woman, wrote, "Sacrificing your body for another male is the height of male bonding." I think that maybe straight men sacrifice themselves for one another in a way that gay men can't understand, such as the way I sacrificed my desire to look at the other male in the shower -- knowing that doing so would make him feel uncomfortable and objectified. At some level, NOT looking helped me experience his masculinity more than looking would have.

To me what you are saying here is that a guy wants to be respected by other men, and I don't mean in a superficial way. My guy friends care about me by treating me as an equal, as a person who is valuable and who watches their backs. To me this is the brotherhood of men. It's not about power or social status. It's something more primitive in the sense that as tribal hunters, men needed to be able to completely rely on one another for survival. Maybe this is a naive take on brotherhood but to me it seems to be in our genetic make-up as human males.

 

[B_henry miller]

To me what you are saying here is that a guy wants to be respected by other men, and I don't mean in a superficial way. My guy friends care about me by treating me as an equal, as a person who is valuable and who watches their backs. To me this is the brotherhood of men. It's not about power or social status. It's something more primitive in the sense that as tribal hunters, men needed to be able to completely rely on one another for survival. Maybe this is a naive take on brotherhood but to me it seems to be in our genetic make-up as human males.

That's exactly it. Thanks for writing this. You obviously should've started this thread.

From this view, my buddy and I in the shower were not so much washing our own bodies, but communal armour. As you said, it's very primitive.

 

[SR_Manny Manparts]

I agree with you Jon..we basically look out for each other, respect each other's opinion, if we get mad, we get over it. It's simple...no drama.

To me what you are saying here is that a guy wants to be respected by other men, and I don't mean in a superficial way. My guy friends care about me by treating me as an equal, as a person who is valuable and who watches their backs. To me this is the brotherhood of men. It's not about power or social status. It's something more primitive in the sense that as tribal hunters, men needed to be able to completely rely on one another for survival. Maybe this is a naive take on brotherhood but to me it seems to be in our genetic make-up as human males.

 

[Cosbraca]

Hi to all!

I don't know if im gonna say something off topic here but in my opinion I think we men have this brotherhood thing or at least we should have it. I say this because there are many things in life that you can only share, talk or feel confortable saying only to another guy... for example talk about women, about sex, masturbation, guy problems... i'm aware that you can talk about sex and masturbation to women as well but on a different level... with guys is kinda different... and with guys u can talk about girls, about all the problems they make us go through hehe... because reality is sometimes those women make us suffer hehe... so we men go through the same thing with women so we understand and support each other.. it's the kind of help and support u can get from another guy.

So I think we do have a brotherhood with our male friends, brothers, etc... not with all men because some things get in the middle like competition for jobs, girls and those kinda stuff which is wrong because all guys should support each other, but that's an utopic idea so... but yeah i think with the guys we are close to like male friends, etc we do have a brotherly bonding and we have to take care of it because i do think there are things only guys can talk about and feel comfortable talking about em to other guys, women are there for each other and guys should be the same way with another guys, if we dont support each other then women will take us hehehe..j/k

cheers mates

 

[B_henry miller]

Thanks Cosbraca. That's exactly what I was talking about.

 

[plumbr]

Whether a brotherhood exists or not, I would hope to believe that it does. I think it brings out the best among men, all men. I think the competition between men exists only when there is a quota on resources. Once people become satisfied, they're happy at the position they are.

 

[B_henry miller]

Woah. It appears I was right after all:
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