Buddy's friend is tryin to steal his girl

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by fak_et, Apr 22, 2007.

  1. fak_et

    fak_et New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    442
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Anyone got any advice for one of my buddy's. He has been into a girl for a while. It is a rough situation because his friend that he went to for advice and all is now trying to steal his girl. He is continually crossing the lines and won't stop even after being talked to about it multiple times.

    Any serious advice?
     
  2. smally

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2006
    Messages:
    229
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    51
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Eastern USA
    Verified:
    Photo
    Maybe he should talk with the girl, say how he feels and explain what is going on. If she lets herself get stolen by the sneaky charactor, she isn't worth fretting over.
     
  3. rob_just_rob

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2005
    Messages:
    6,037
    Likes Received:
    9
    Location:
    Nowhere near you
    This isn't the behaviour of a friend.

    If he's been talked to already, it's up to her. Hopefully (for your buddy) she is a good judge of character.

    Personally, in these situations I like to take the high road: Make my feelings for her clear, tell her how I see things, but make it clear that she has to make a definitive decision. And if she chooses him, I'd proceed to stomp the shit out of him.

    (ok, so it's not quite such a high road. Feel free to ignore the last sentence of the previous paragraph, which is less than serious advice.)
     
  4. zaza

    zaza New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2006
    Messages:
    444
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Female
    I agree that it is all up to the girl, so talking about it with her would be good.
     
  5. anon265

    anon265 Member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2007
    Messages:
    59
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Very well said. (except that last sentence :biggrin1: )
     
  6. ddazndd

    ddazndd New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2007
    Messages:
    314
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
    She's not his "girl" just becuase he likes her. It's a fair game, he has to act first and show that he wants her more.
     
  7. OmahaBeef

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 6, 2006
    Messages:
    1,037
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Given the limited amount of info thus far, I can only say this:

    Keep in mind that on a subconcious level, this girl is eating up the attention she's getting. She may SAY to him she doesnt like the conflict, but thats probably not the case.

    The girl: There should be no question in her mind about this (if she is worthy of a relationship.) Your buddy doesnt deserve some love triangle, drama bullshit. If she is being shady in all of this...tell him to tell the chick to take a hike...

    The dude: Any guy who butts in on a taken woman, is a lowlife worthy of nothing less than a hospital visit. I call these guys "butt-sniffers" because they are like a dog going around sniffing any ass thats in their vicinity. These are men of extremely poor character, and if the chick starts digging the butt-sniffer, then the problem is solved and the bitch can take a hike.

    ...OB
     
  8. B_dxjnorto

    B_dxjnorto New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2006
    Messages:
    7,319
    Likes Received:
    21
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Southwest U.S.
    Especially because the butt-sniffer likely wouldn't know the girl without the buddy. That's an opportunist - no friend of mine.
     
  9. darkone

    darkone New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2006
    Messages:
    721
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Not a lot of details on the situation but if he has feelings for this girl then he needs to confront her with them and if she isn't willing to respect them and not tell this other guy off then find another girl she isn't worth it.
     
  10. OmahaBeef

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 6, 2006
    Messages:
    1,037
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male

    In respect to butt-sniffers...:rolleyes: Sometimes the sniffee doesnt reveal they are taken:mad:

    But that isnt the case here. He is a douche bag.

    ...OB
     
  11. Overhung

    Overhung New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2005
    Messages:
    27
    Likes Received:
    0
    You can't steal someone else's girl, not ever, if a girl goes for someone else move on it's her choice. Life is not 3rd grade all over. None of us belong to anyone, male or female, we're not property.
     
  12. D_Herin_Ghan

    D_Herin_Ghan Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2006
    Messages:
    713
    Likes Received:
    0
    I would never steal a friends girl. In my opinion, your buddy needs to assert himself. Tell this friend "back the fuck off, or I'll stomp the shit out of you".

    Tell the girl, him or me.

    Problem solved.
     
  13. Dorset

    Dorset New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2005
    Messages:
    408
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    UK
    I know it sounds pathetic but if the guy gets your mates girlfriend that someone needs to give him a good kicking. People shouldn't be able to get away with that
     
  14. fak_et

    fak_et New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    442
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Well I guess they had a meeting and his friend filled him on on it, he apologized finally and said he won't do it anymore.
     
  15. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2006
    Messages:
    6,378
    Likes Received:
    11
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    where the sun never sets
    This girl isn't your friend's property. If he feels threatened by anyone else coming on to her then maybe he doesn't have that much to offer her and she should be with someone else. My advice to your friend would be to focus on what it is he has to offer and what it is that he can bring to the relationship, not on eliminating competition.
     
  16. Dorset

    Dorset New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2005
    Messages:
    408
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    UK
    That might be true but if it's your mate and he's in the middle of hitting on the girl then it's kind of an unwritten rule that you don't try and jump in and try getting her for yourself. Your mates should come first
     
  17. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2006
    Messages:
    6,378
    Likes Received:
    11
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    where the sun never sets
    I agree it's kind of a shitty thing for a friend to do, but the OP wasn't asking a philosophical question about friendship, he was asking for advice to give his friend. I know I'm not in the majority, but personally I feel that no relationship is sacred and that people should be with whom they want to be with, simple as that. I'm not the possessive or jealous type, and feel that if someone cheats there's usually a good reason.
     
  18. AndrewEndowed24

    AndrewEndowed24 New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2004
    Messages:
    181
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    At some level I agree with NIC, but ultimately how many relationships would survive if the members were constantly being propositioned? (I know this isn't the situation, but it seems to me that there have to be some barriers, a some sense that someone is off limits (though not utterly inviolabe) if relationships are going to exist at all. This comes out to: all of the responsibility for staying faithful probably shouldn't rest on the partners in the relationship, other people should act with some level (though not absolute) deference to their status as in a relationship.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted