Came Out to Wife

Countryguy63

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Congratulations on the honesty. There are more MOM/MOR (Mixed Orientation Marriages/Mixed Orientation Relationships) than most people realize.

Just like "normal" hetero marriages, not all work out, but honesty and communication gives it a far better chance.

All the best :biggrin1:
 

D_Fiona_Farvel

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Congrats to the OP!

welcome to your life! you're getting better at being the best and real you. Nice, and not to worry, you're wife doesn't have male plumbing, so she can't compete. Just don't screw around with women.
I do not know the boundaries of the OP's relationship, but many bisexuals are perfectly content in monogamous relationships. However one identifies in terms of sexuality, attraction to another individual does not necessarily mean there's a desire to bang around. I think monogamy-oriented bisexual men are particularly vulnerable to this misconception, so let's be clear - sexuality and relationship practices are independent of each other.


Compete? Indeed. :rolleyes:
 

addy

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Congrats to the OP!


I do not know the boundaries of the OP's relationship, but many bisexuals are perfectly content in monogamous relationships. However one identifies in terms of sexuality, attraction to another individual does not necessarily mean there's a desire to bang around. I think monogamy-oriented bisexual men are particularly vulnerable to this misconception, so let's be clear - sexuality and relationship practices are independent of each other.


Compete? Indeed. :rolleyes:

Absolutely spot on!
 

sexplease

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Congrats to the OP!


I do not know the boundaries of the OP's relationship, but many bisexuals are perfectly content in monogamous relationships. However one identifies in terms of sexuality, attraction to another individual does not necessarily mean there's a desire to bang around. I think monogamy-oriented bisexual men are particularly vulnerable to this misconception, so let's be clear - sexuality and relationship practices are independent of each other.


Compete? Indeed. :rolleyes:
quite right.
Many people fool themselves into thinking they are monogamous and assume it for their partners too. a recipe for many failed relationships. Failure to be a realist by being needy and selfish.
 

dong-in-khakis

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Good for you Centersharp!

There are many bi (and gay) guys out there married to women. I met a terribly hot young bi couple on the internet once. WOW, you talk about hot, both of them..
 

fournineteenfiftynine

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It will be interesting....I've met over 20 guys the last couple years that came out to their wives...all situations are different and many women reacted differently....but one consistent seems to be that women really don't like their men to have any same sex attraction....there is a double standard in that it is okay for women to have same sex attraction and yet I think it is VERY threatening to women in these relationships...in the short run some try to make it work but in the end it seems to never really work....I was fortunate in some ways that my exwife was very clear about this as I tried to make what I thought was my bisexuality work when her instincts were correct in the saying "bi today" "gay tomorrow." It was true in our case. I do think the bisexuality exists but I also think that male bisexuality is very complex and really does threaten most female's view of what a relationship is....just sayin...
 

LaFemme

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Congrats to the OP!


I do not know the boundaries of the OP's relationship, but many bisexuals are perfectly content in monogamous relationships. However one identifies in terms of sexuality, attraction to another individual does not necessarily mean there's a desire to bang around. I think monogamy-oriented bisexual men are particularly vulnerable to this misconception, so let's be clear - sexuality and relationship practices are independent of each other.


Compete? Indeed. :rolleyes:

Amen! I've been in relationships with 2 bi men, and neither ended because his sexuality or need to be with another man.
 

Joseph

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A really high thumbs up from me. I would already start a relationship with the person knowing I'm bi. It's a very obvious part of my life, I couldn't just quit one gender and pretend to only like the other one. Glad your wife is reasonable.

This whole thing always angered me. Women want honesty and truth, but when a guy openly admits being bi, suddenly it's evil! I know a lot of people who hide their bisexuality... isn't that much more suspicious than a guy just "coming out" and being honest?
 

wappingite

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Congratulations OP on your steps with your wife to bring an honest dialogue about who you really are. I'm curious to your reasons for making this brave step. Was it a desire to be transparent to improve your relationship or were you trying to head off any trouble coming your was based on a backlog of same sex activity? Was she aware of any extra-marital activity? If you've been active without her knowing, there are really two issues here: infidelity and bisexuality.

The cat is out of the bag and there's no going back. It's early days since your disclosure, so I'm sure her reaction is going to evolve and she is going to have many questions and concerns. You'll both need to decide what you can live with and parameters of the relationship. Don't be surprised if she decides it's not she signed up for. You weren't honest and it's certainly her perogarive.

Best of luck regardless, it's a step forward to be honest about yourself and what you bring to a relationship.