Camp, Effeminate Men Why ?

Discussion in 'Underwear, Clothing, and Appearance Issues' started by D_Relentless Original, Apr 29, 2008.

  1. D_Relentless Original

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    Not here to offend anyone, just curious as a gay guy myself, just wondering what makes some guys camp and effeminate, alot of the guys i have come across are Bitchy , sarcastic and nasty and just out to shock and upset, where other gay guys can be butchm down to earth and easy to get on with, like i said im not asking to be discriminate or offend anyone just really curious as to why the difference.
     
  2. midlifebear

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    I ascribe it to being what one eats. In which case, I'm cheap, fast, and greasy.
     
  3. cocktoberfest

    cocktoberfest New Member

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    I think it comes down to early conditioning and insecurity. I used to think "if I like guys I must be like a girl" and acted that way. Then people treated me a certain way and I was insecure about it. But when I became more secure about myself, my natural masculinity took over.

    If a bitchy queen was secure in himself do you think he would have a pinched up face and bad attitude? Probably not.
     
  4. ScottishLad

    ScottishLad Active Member

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    Boorish, thuggish straight men that drink cheap cider, spit in public and beat up their girlfriends- why?

    What makes some straight men decent and others arseholes; straight men, like gay men, are individuals. Individuals as we know are all different and don't like to be pigeon holed.

    Just like I am sure you wouldn't like to be judged to be narrow-minded and rather silly!
     
  5. HamYai

    HamYai New Member

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    I have no problem with gays...


    BUT....

    I can't abide campness.

    Yet my only gay experience (where I shared a bed with a guy and sucked him to completion and also indulged in other activities:wink:) was at my direction.

    I was a lot younger than I am now and hitched a lift.

    The guy who gave me a lift gave out no homo vibes at all and it was ME who decided I wanted to explore (I was very drunk) and adopted an effeminate slant on my voice as i talked with him.

    Needless to say, rather than taking me home he took me to his home.

    Yet even after that admission, I have to say that nothing would turn me off a guy more quickly than if he acted like a wannabee girl.

    Seems that's pretty much all you need to do to succeed in the media &/or get your own chat show, these days.
     
  6. Zayne

    Zayne New Member

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    if i had to guess, I'd say that what makes some effeminate is a family arrangement with a dominating mother and a passive father,

    just to add, i don't see 'camp' necessarily as the opposite of 'effeminate,' unless camp is a term used in the gay community to describe masculine types. If you're family liked going outdoors, and more likely if they liked going on camping trips together, it seems you will be more partial toward doing it when you get older.
     
  7. B_Hung Muscle

    B_Hung Muscle New Member

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    I love all kinds of guys -- gay, straight, camp, butch, tall, short, fat, skinny, black, white, purple. Anything but fake and boring.

    Get over the hating.
     
  8. HamYai

    HamYai New Member

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    How about 4 sisters and a mother and no father?

    I'm not feminine.
     
  9. yngjock20

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    I'm not sure what exactly triggers the affect one takes on in becoming whom one becomes, but it most likely has to do with what attracts a young mind.

    Sometimes it's the people in your environment, sometimes it's what kind of information you are privy to in your formative years, but it's all a bit of a mystery.

    I've known guys who were effeminate from childhood and continued to become bitchy gay men as well as guys who were the roughest, toughest kid who also grew up to be bitchy and effeminate.

    I was quite effeminate as a child, but as I grew older and realized what interested me, I started to slough off my queeny exterior and trade into a more "normal-gay" persona.
     
  10. Rugbypup

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    Then why do you have your manly locks in pig tails, lol.
     
  11. D_Relentless Original

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    Whoa, think you may need to re-read and see who is on the defensive!, i was not comparing straight men i was asking the people on this forum their opinion , that is what i thought this place was for ,is why they think there is a difference in gay men who are camp,effeminate to gay men who are not! my apologies if you fall into the latter and i offended you, like i said it was opinions, and i think that there is a lot of truth in what Devil has written that makes sense , i never thought about it from that angle before. phew
     
  12. Drifterwood

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    Agreed - though I do have a soft spot for Julian Clary.
     
  13. HamYai

    HamYai New Member

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    ?
     
  14. yngjock20

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    HAHAHAHA!!!
     
  15. Zayne

    Zayne New Member

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    to be honest, i'm wavering on my answer. I also might think that if a father emasculates his son -- or the son feels emasculated -- then he might be effeminate.

    Assuming that's the case, maybe you filled in a certain fatherly role in your family, maybe you had a close masculine friend who you emulated,,

    there are several possibilities. i don't know enough about you to guess
     
  16. D_Relentless Original

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    And i do for John barrowman, No hate here, just a genuine question:smile:
     
  17. HamYai

    HamYai New Member

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    I wouldn't go so far as to say i "hate" effiminate guys.

    Let's just say I love them as much as I love butch females with facial hair who sound like Paul Robson, when they speak.
     
  18. D_Relentless Original

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    Lol, who;s Paul Robson STD ?
     
  19. Marina67

    Marina67 New Member

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    FWIW I think you're asking an important question that deserves a real discussion, but I don't think you're going to get it here. The paradox about this comm is that though it's a great way of trying to get people to look at men (not just their cocks) and try to figure out what the hell does all of it really matter, you're more likely to get a lot of responses that stick with the traditional expectations and roles.

    In other words, a lot of people will ask some great questions, but for the most part, you'll never find any real discussion or responses. At the least, you *can* ask the questions openly, if not to get the answer.

    With that said: male identity and male *expression* are complicated. Since I come from the female side (yes, bitch away, pun allowed) who has been doing a lot of thinking for a long time what all this shit is about, your answer is important. But it isn't as easy as a one answer fits all.

    I would tell you my own specific thoughts on particulars, but mostly from the female side (why do some lesbians get all butch etc.), but it may not have the same implications, as well as not necessarily indicative of what it might be like on the male side.
     
  20. Marina67

    Marina67 New Member

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    I didn't make the original comment, but FWIW Paul Robeson was an actor. This was during the very early Hollywood films and he was a black actor and singer. His voice as a prominent deep baritone (bass) voice.

    It might be easier if you think of Barry White's voice (a singer who died a few years ago); he was well known for throaty crooning love songs in his deep baritone.

    The other dude was basically making a crack that he 'hates' effeminate gay men and butch (masculine) lesbians.
     
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