Camp vs Straight acting

[Countryguy63]

OK well let's put camp to one side then, forget about it for a second. Do you think you could be attracted to a man who was naturally effeminate, not a flaming queen ? Some guys, naturally, have traits which are commonly thought of as feminine, are these traits a turnoff too ?

Not attracted to it, but don't get me wrong, I don't discriminate against it either. I have friends in the city of that nature, and I do like hanging with them when I make it up there. I think a natural part of feminine acting gays is comedy, lol. They can keep me laughing.

 

[BIGBULL29]

I don't think I'm "butch", have very little interest in traditional sports (mostly rodeo), but if you knew me, there would be no doubt that I was masculine. BIG difference between masculine and campy.

I like gentle masculine guys :biggrin1:

I'm not brute here myself. I'm very gently masculine by nature. But I can be a BULL in bed (don't like sports, either, but I'd go to a rodeo:biggrin1.

There's nothing wrong with being feminine, camp, etc...as long as that is the real you!

 

[Countryguy63]

I'm not brute here myself. I'm very gently masculine by nature. But I can be a BULL in bed (don't like sports, either, but I'd go to a rodeo:biggrin1.

There's nothing wrong with being feminine, camp, etc...as long as that is the real you!

Why would I make you go to a rodeo, when we could have one of our own??:biggrin1: Yeehaw

 

[BIGBULL29]

Why would I make you go to a rodeo, when we could have one of our own??:biggrin1: Yeehaw

A big dick rodeo? Make the bull proud!

 

[B_dxjnorto]

I love gentleness in men. To me gentleness is a very masculine trait.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

I love gentleness in men. To me gentleness is a very masculine trait.

I wouldn't disagree with you. But how do you feel about traits which you associate more with femininity in a guy ?

 

[B_dxjnorto]

I've met some pretty feminine supposedly straight guys. It is weird or discomfiting just because it is incongruous. But I've met some badass straight guys who were not good to their kids or their women. I find them very insecure, not masculine. It's a toss-up.

With very campy men, I am discomfited just because it elevates their homosexuality to their most salient feature. As soon as they walk in a room -- look at me, I'm gay. Who cares? I find sexuality to not be a definitive feature.

 

[BigLittleMan]

i am attracted to men, both mentally and physically. if a man is not a "man" i'm probably not going to be attracted. unfortunately, a lot of gay men confuse being "queeny" with being gay--yet it has nothing to do with dance music, fashion, hairstyle, etc.

for the blanket statement that gay men only want people just like themselves, that's a cop-out. i tend to be attracted to smaller, "nerdy" guys who are cute and funny.

and before you criticize, ask yourself, "what type of guy am i attracted to?" the big ole queen who screams for attention or the goodlooking guy in a tshirt and jeans?

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

With very campy men, I am discomfited just because it elevates their homosexuality to their most salient feature. As soon as they walk in a room -- look at me, I'm gay. Who cares? I find sexuality to not be a definitive feature.

Bingo for me, dxjnorto.

 

[concupisys]

as far as real 'attraction' goes, i definitely would be in to a gentle-man.... someone genuine, who is as comfortable with himself chopping wood in the forest as he is cooking a gourmet meal.... i find i can't be attracted to guys that lean too much towards a certain extreme because that's not something i do, and i feel a man would understand me and all my leanings better if he leaned in much the same ways.... in the end, understanding is a very key component of attraction, and men that lean only in one direction tend to be attracted to similar men because the understanding of that 'self' is apparent and therefore easier to connect with.... i personally have a lot of offbeat qualities, and that in turn has given me a very distinct personality and point of view that is neither masculine or feminine.... that in turn makes me seek out a man who understands that, understands me, who i understand and can share in all those offbeat things with.... like, looking at that person and in that person would be like looking in to a mirror, but i wouldn't be looking at myself.... just something and someone i recognize very deeply....

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

i am attracted to men, both mentally and physically. if a man is not a "man" i'm probably not going to be attracted. unfortunately, a lot of gay men confuse being "queeny" with being gay--yet it has nothing to do with dance music, fashion, hairstyle, etc.

for the blanket statement that gay men only want people just like themselves, that's a cop-out. i tend to be attracted to smaller, "nerdy" guys who are cute and funny.

and before you criticize, ask yourself, "what type of guy am i attracted to?" the big ole queen who screams for attention or the goodlooking guy in a tshirt and jeans?

Why would I criticize you ? And if you reread my OP you'll see that I stated that I (genuinely) find all kinds of men attractive, camp ones, straight acting ones, indeterminate whatever, it's not about how they act, it's about some quality they have, maybe it's self assurance and confidence, natural sexiness, who knows :wink:

I also never made any blanket statement that gay men are only attracted to guys exactly like themselves. I said a lot of gay guys seem to follow this pattern, not all.

Your post is pretty defensive seeming, I'm sorry if my OP questions made you feel that way, I was genuinely interested in the answers people might give and not interested in criticising them.

 

[Rugbypup]

I feel no attraction to effeminate men, at all.

I'd go as far as to say I can even find them offensive at times.

 

[Stephenmass]

OK well let's put camp to one side then, forget about it for a second. Do you think you could be attracted to a man who was naturally effeminate, not a flaming queen ? Some guys, naturally, have traits which are commonly thought of as feminine, are these traits a turnoff too ?

I could be friends with the most camp of the camp; matter of fact I find them to be very funny and straightforward at least and I think moreso than most guys.

But to be in a relationship with? No.

 

[D_Relentless Original]

I feel no attraction to effeminate men, at all.

I'd go as far as to say I can even find them offensive at times.

Yes i agree ^.

I find majority of the younger gay guys very camp, very bitchy and insulting, not all admittedly, but alot. the point they seem to make is look at me, screaming, hysterical offensive behaviour and the world owes them everything.

I would be with a woman before a camp screaming queen.I like Men to be Men.

 

[deleted213967]

I am in love with the Can't Tell type.

Assuredly, a gay "accent" as thick as Yasir Arafat's English is no more attractive than Arafat himself (especially now that he is less alive).

But isn't there is a straight counterpart to gay camp: that ultra-contrived, dude-and-shit, keep-my-distance-from-dudes-although-I-spend-all-my-time-with-them posturing common in locker room banter?

 

[Rugbypup]

I would be with a woman before a camp screaming queen. I like Men to be Men.

I agree, lol.

 

[B_dxjnorto]

I could be friends with the most camp of the camp; matter of fact I find them to be very funny and straightforward at least and I think moreso than most guys.

keep-my-distance-from-dudes-although-I-spend-all-my-time-with-them posturing common in locker room banter?

Good points guys. Maybe the campy guy is like the foreigner who can get away with things by feigning not to know our social conventions. And the posturing guys who behave as they think others expect them to behave do not interest me as friends. All bluster, no substance.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

I am in love with the Can't Tell type.

Assuredly, a gay "accent" as thick as Yasir Arafat's English is no more attractive than Arafat himself (especially now that he is less alive).

But isn't there is a straight counterpart to gay camp: that ultra-contrived, dude-and-shit, keep-my-distance-from-dudes-although-I-spend-all-my-time-with-them posturing common in locker room banter?

I completely agree, there is a straight "drag" the intensely self concious bloke-ishness as they would call it here. I guess what I've been getting at in this thread is not "why are people not attracted to guys who put on a front and are not being true to themselves ?" it's "If a guy is just naturally a little bit more feminine ( in inverted commas ) is he automatically less attractive ?" My point being that maculinity comes in all kinds of colours and not in a uniform navy, there are all kinds of ways to be masculine which come from being honest and true to yourself, and not all of them look like the cardboard cutout version of what a man is traditionally expected to be.

The most masculine men I know are the most honest ones, and they don't hunt, or bluster and pretend or watch Soccer just because they think they should. And sometimes they can even be a bit girly, just because they are completely comfortable with their masculinity.

 

[B_dxjnorto]

And sometimes they can even be a bit girly, just because they are completely comfortable with their masculinity.

Yes, human beings have much more in common than we do differences. The paradox is that small differences often cause the most problems. Because they are so numerous maybe. People tend to band together to solve big problems.

 

[salsfe]

I am in love with the Can't Tell type.

That is exactly what I like :09:

However bartending in a gay bar everyone becomes your friend and you also treat your customers right. Getting to the point, I have gotten to know the flamboyant queens as well as the drag queens and all sorts of “types” I am friendly with all of them in or out of the bar, but still prefer the above.