Can a Man be TOO attractive?

[B_dxjnorto]

I understand what you mean, but you have to use different words to describe it because by definition and grammar the words 'attractive' and 'good looking' are synonyms (they mean the exact same thing).

They are not the exact same thing. Look up synonyms. That's why we have synonyms, so we can describe nuance.

Women, can a man be too attractive for you to date?

Post a face pic so we can tell you. You may be too attractive for this woman. What Meniscus said made very good sense. Also thought FuzzyKen gave very good (but tragic) examples.

 

[Jovial]

It seems like there must be some prejudice from women thinking very attractive men must be a certain way. It doesn't make sense to not want to be with the men you feel most attracted to. It's like saying you don't want to eat certain foods because they taste too good (assuming they are healthy foods).

 

[B_Bonky]

yes, women think of a very attractive man like a huge chocolate candy. Very tasty but could cause you lots of pain and humiliation if you're not careful.

 

[D_Brecock Evileye]

This isnt something I am likely to have happen to me. lol

 

[midwestbeef]

yes, women think of a very attractive man like a huge chocolate candy. Very tasty but could cause you lots of pain and humiliation if you're not careful.

Haha, well said Bonky, I think your thought fills this topic nicely.

 

[dolfette]

of course, she could just be using that as an excuse.
it could well be that she just doesn't like you.

 

[D_Saleth Scruffytrim]

Sometimes one can be very attractive and have a huge ego so i guess you could ut it like that.

 

[AlphaMale]

They are not the exact same thing. Look up synonyms. That's why we have synonyms, so we can describe nuance.

Per the definition of synonym from dictionary.com:

syn·o·nym 1. A word having the same or nearly the same meaning as another word or other words in a language.

So they can be the same thing.

And according to this search: attractive synonym | Thesaurus.com

Attractive = Beautiful
Beautiful = Good-Looking

So yeah the words might not be identical, but they are so very close to each other that they can be categorized as 'same or nearly the same meaning'.

 

[B_dxjnorto]

Okay, then look up nuance. Attractive doesn't necessarily mean beautiful. It means something that attracts.

 

[midwestbeef]

Ive got an update on the situation that started this thread. I met up with the girl Ive been seeing on saturday at my place. I asked her straight out what she meant last time when she said she wouldnt date anyone more attractive than her. Basically she said that she had been in two other relationships with guys who were very attractive and that they did not end well at all. In both instances the guys she was with cheated on her with multiple other women. She said she talked it over a lot with her gfs and they all decided that a man can be to "hot for his own good." I told her that was BS and that its up to the character of the guy, not if he is good looking or not.

It goes a little deeper than that, but that was the basic idea. Than I said Im not like that, and she said she can kind of see that, but she doesnt want to get into a relationship right now than asked if I wanted to end the fun weve been having. Of course I said no, because the sex is amazing, and Ive had time to think about it also. I dont really want to be dating a woman who thinks of guys in that way, or that might be self conscious because of it. So for now at least, its just gonna be some amazing sex with no strings, which I can live with for now.

 

[Enid]

She said she talked it over a lot with her gfs and they all decided that a man can be too "hot for his own good." I told her that was BS and that its up to the character of the guy, not if he is good looking or not.

You're right -- it is VERY much up to the character of the guy. For her to judge you based on your looks is not right, but that's how many people operate.

Good that you talked; I wish you the best of luck!

 

[morsecode]

If I was handsome enough that a woman would say something like that, it would be like water of my back (or whatever the proper saying is). I doubt you have a really hard time getting women anyways.

 

[B_Bonky]

good rebuttal, OP. And good decision to keep screwing her with NSA

 

[B_Jimtfmb]

A long time ago when I was in college I saw a bearish 40ish guy that was around 7 feet tall.
To me height is the sexiest thing so I went over to hit on him. He kept insisting that I was in on some joke and there was no way someone like me could be interested in him. It sucks when people don't have self confidence, but look on the bright side. You have dodged a relationship with someone that would probably have become insecure any time you talked to someone in your "own league".

 

[B_casualtxt]

This sounds odd to me. If many women do the same as you to attractive guys, then those guys will just think women don't like him that much for whatever reason. Why would the super hot guy then approach you or show interest in you when some many woman blew him off so many times? It seems like he wouldn't have any confidence.

It just sounds like you are playing some game of trying to teach men a lesson or something, trying to knock them down a peg.

I really don't do the game-playing... which is why I said what I said. I don't really fool around with superpretty guys who come off as arrogant. It has been my personal experience that they think of women as playthings. I stick to guys who seem to have a genuine interest in me. I think most normal people like it when a person they like actually likes them back and they can tell. Just because I think a person seems arrogant doesn't mean everyone else does; it's very likely that a guy I don't get a good vibe from can give a GREAT vibe to someone else.

 

[Jovial]

Basically she said that she had been in two other relationships with guys who were very attractive and that they did not end well at all. In both instances the guys she was with cheated on her with multiple other women.

I don't understand. She'd rather just fuck you, then if you are fucking other women it's not really cheating; but if you were dating, then seeing other women would be cheating? Isn't it possible that you could date her, go out in public, etc. and not be exclusive? It seems like she is equating going out and dating with being exclusive.

 

[naughty]

I don't understand. She'd rather just fuck you, then if you are fucking other women it's not really cheating; but if you were dating, then seeing other women would be cheating? Isn't it possible that you could date her, go out in public, etc. and not be exclusive? It seems like she is equating going out and dating with being exclusive.

I think you have hit upon something here ,Jovial. All too often there is a disparity in understanding the nature of relationships. I dont personally think a man or a woman can ever be too attractive. They either are or they arent. The issue arises when the person with them reacts out of insecurity when others respond to that beauty, when one part of the twosome doesnt feel they can compete, or other issues related to self esteem. In the two cases mentioned that has nothing to do with the individual's personal attractiveness but rather whether there is a agreement of exclusivity and whether both individuals are abiding by that agreement.

 

[greatdickismydrug]

Ive got an update on the situation that started this thread. THANKS

Basically she said that she had been in two other relationships with guys who were very attractive and that they did not end well at all. In both instances the guys she was with cheated on her with multiple other women..... NEWSFLASH HERE: this can happen with not so attractive men too. Why does everyone assume that the less attractive the better the character? She said she talked it over a lot with her gfs and they all decided that a man can be to "hot for his own good." Nonsense. Decision by committee. Gotta love it. They sound more like girls than women.
So for now at least, its just gonna be some amazing sex with no strings, which I can live with for now.

Thatta boy. I bet you can honey. :wink:

 

[ZOS23xy]

The question is for women, and guys who have had this happen to them before. Women, can a man be too attractive for you to date? The reason I bring this up is that it happened to me just recently and I was completely stunned. Dont get me wrong, I dont think im some kind of model, which is why it threw me.



After our last heated session, while she was leaving, i asked if she wanted to start dating in public, going out to places, seeing friends, etc. She said "no" and I said "why not", now i remember this next sentance word for word because of the impact. She flat out said "I wont date a guy who is more attractive than me." I didnt even know how to respond, so I remember just saying "ok", than she left. That happened this last weekend and I havent talked to her about it yet, we are supposed to be seeing each other at my place this thursday.

Have any of the women of this forum ever thought anything like that, and if so, what does it mean really? Thanks

Hmmm. She sounds like she has issues. You wrote about her "not wanting to be seen"....that is, in public. Maybe there's more than one man?

Then again, it could be the immature thing of being able to dismiss you for a small minded reason.

 

[ZOS23xy]

Wow, I appreciate all the responses and all the opinions. Ive been called nicknames before like "hollywood" and a female engineer at my work calls me "PBD" which means pretty boy dimples. So im used to having that sort of attention, I just never thought it would keep me from dating, I always thought that it could only help. Thankfully when people get to know me, they see thats its just my exterior and I dont act the way I look at all, which is why the engineer I work with doesnt really call me that anymore. Im not gonna get on a soapbox and ask for your pity of course, because women are judged much more harshly according to their looks, both the beautiful and not.

Is the face really as attractive as the body? Hmm hmm. I mean yours.