Probably my deepest, closest, most intense friendship was with a man who was mostly gay. In most male friendships, there's a certain level of bravado and machismo, you can't really show any weakness or talk about your feelings. It's tough to be yourself in friendships with women, for the most part I'm trying to nail them, and if not, and they're just friends, they can never really "get" you because they don't know what it's like to be a man. With my friend, it was strange, because it was almost like he was part girl, part guy. I only had sex with him once (only guy I ever fucked), and that made our bond even stronger. I could be intimate with him, in every sense of the word. I could tell him ANYTHING, not worrying about how it would sound or being judged. He was a valuable advisor, not just about style or culture, but about everything, because we had had similar childhoods, similar lives, and he was the only person I could ever let all my walls down at once for. He was handsome, but delicate, almost like a woman, but not in a swishy kind of way. He had a small build, soft skin, thick nice smelling hair. I felt protective of him the way I feel about girls, and it was natural for me to hold him, cuddle with him, kiss him on the forehead. I learned a lot from him. He got sick last year, and it was only then that I realized how deeply I cared about him. He was everything to me, lover, best friend, family. It worked because he was uniquely who he was. I've never had that specific type of relationship with anybody else, he was one of a kind. But my life was better because of it.