Can you tell how loose a guy's asshole is by the sound of his farts?

[earllogjam]

higher pitched fart = tighter asshole

lower pitched = looser asshole

 

[2322]

Not exactly the way to judge potential pick-ups there Earl... :fart:

I get loose flappy farts and some real rippers and my hole is virgin territory so I'd have to say no.

I can't believe I just responded to that....

 

[D_skeaflea]

I get loose flappy farts and some real rippers and my hole is virgin territory so I'd have to say no.

But, you're 90% gay. Does the gay gene have a direct effect on flatulence?

Someone fund a study.

 

[Smartalk]

Is that what is meant ny the term sniffing around .............. phew nifter

 

[2322]

Is that what is meant ny the term sniffing around .............. phew nifter

SSSSHHHHHH!!!!! Arliss might hear you! :wall:

 

[Scrufuss]

I must resist from posting all the rude crude and out right disgusting remarks that are swimming around in my head right now. If they gross me out, then I know many people will be beyond disgusted. But I do enjoy making people cring so.

Lets talk about microscopic airborn particles of the mans fecal matter... (yes its true, when U smell the shit, its cause you are inhaling airborne particles of shit...)

OK NO U CANT TELL BY THE FARTS!
You have to stick your nose in his ass and feel how the sphincter wraps around it.
If it sounds squishy its cause he or she's has watery bowels!
If it sounds tight and dry then he's constipated and you should run a finger in there to help him out!
UGh OK I degress.. It was a question that deserved some rude remarks.
I personally as a gay man do not comprehend the obsession most gays (or str8s) have with sticking ones cock in a mans (womans) one way toxic waste shute. But I can make lots of wise cracks about it.

Oops, did I type all that?​

 

[2322]

By that logic then it's no go with the mouth too. That also being a, "one way chute." The small percentage of the time it's not, I don't want to think about.

The anus is an erogenous zone. It's loaded with extremely sensitive nerves designed to receive pleasure. It also is right beside the prostate, an organ also capable of receiving intensely pleasurable stimulation. So long as one's hygiene is good and there's no immediate need to defecate, the anus is pretty damn clean. It does not hold fecal matter save for immediately before and during defecation.

The psychological effects, for many men, of penetrating the anus of another person are remarkably and wonderfully intense to say nothing of the physical pleasure it provides to the penis.

 

[B_starinvestor]

My we get some interesting posts here.

 

[Scrufuss]

By that logic (1) then it's no go with the mouth too. That also being a, "one way chute." The small percentage of the time it's not, I don't want to think about. (2)

The anus is an erogenous zone. It's loaded with extremely sensitive nerves designed to receive pleasure. (3) It also is right beside the prostate, an organ also capable of receiving intensely pleasurable stimulation. (4) So long as one's hygiene is good and there's no immediate need to defecate, the anus is pretty damn clean. It does not hold fecal matter save for immediately before and during defecation. (5)

The psychological effects, (6) for many men, of penetrating the anus of another person are remarkably and wonderfully intense to say nothing of the physical pleasure it provides to the penis. (7)

(1) What logic,there was logic?
(2) Ha too late you thought about it - U R there, did you gross yourself out?
(3) So humans evolved to recieve pleasure from wiping ones ass?
(4) Mine must be shorted out, how about yours?
(5) Oh u mean there is no trace matter left just on the inside of that sphincter after "defacation"
(6) Left over from when apes liked to fuk the ugly of another apes ass, I bet.
(7) OK true, theres a stimulation for the fucker, not for the fuckee if he was me. But what if when you withdraw your poor peter and more comes out then you put in? Need I describe THAt in detail? How about when when one "farts" the smell is airborn fecal matter, is it not? Breath deep...

 

[cockoloco]

opcorn:

 

[Scrufuss]

opcorn:

:tongue:

 

[jumbo747jet]

I hate to say it, but your dating must really stink ...:fart:

 

[Scrufuss]

I hate to say it, but your dating must really stink ...:fart:

OH U LIE!
YOU LOVED to say it and you know it!!
:tongue-tied:
LOL

 

[marleyisalegend]

Funniest Thread Title Ever!

 

[earllogjam]

How can this not be true?

The pitch of a fart is directly related to the tightness of the sphincter. Try blowing air out of your lips and making a blubbing sound like a tuba player - now vary the pitch.

 

[D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead]

How can this not be true?

The pitch of a fart is directly related to the tightness of the sphincter. Try blowing air out of your lips and making a blubbing sound like a tuba player - now vary the pitch.

The speed of the air being farted ... and the amount of air, as well ... would make a difference in the quality of the fart sound, too.

BTW, did you all see this on SNL this past weekend?

YouTube - GasRight Strips

 

[Xcuze]

Oh Lord, its a slow day on LPSG looking at etc etc....

I find farting really off-putting. If a guy did it in front of me I wouldnt be remotely interested in how tight his hole is. I wouldnt be trying to get in it anyway.

 

[B_Think_Kink]

lol.

 

[D_Portelay Porquesword]

I had Direct TV installed yesterday. The installer was asking me a question and he farted.
While I did not smell it, I opened the front door anyways. The odor from the detergent he used to wash his uniform was making my nose itch.

I do not believe the sound is any indication of anus size etc. I do believe the odor can be a strong indicator as to whether or not something has crawled up in there and died!

:eek13: :fart:

 

[B_Jennuine73]

How can this not be true?

The pitch of a fart is directly related to the tightness of the sphincter. Try blowing air out of your lips and making a blubbing sound like a tuba player - now vary the pitch.

Umm, do I have to?