cant climax during sex ...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by PatriotSam, Aug 2, 2009.

  1. PatriotSam

    PatriotSam New Member

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    i just had sex for the first time (yay!) but i didn't climax ... but she did in like 2 minutes? Kind of an odd reversal of problems. (If you can call that a problem?)

    I also had 3 blow jobs during the day and while they felt absolutely amazing, i didn't climax with those either ... i just basically tired the girl out because i just wanted her to keep sucking.

    What's your take on this?

    It doesn't feel like anything is wrong physically?

    i do feel like maybe sex for the first time and my feelings for this girl where just so many new sensations in rapid succession that my mind was concentrating on what i was doing to her, and not allowing myself to relax into it where i could have an orgasim?

    Does that sound reasonable?

    Any ideas?

    i get hard really fast around her and i can orgasim when i masterbate but it dosent seem to be happeing when she's in the picture? (Not that she's not enjoying it ... i've got the claw marks to prove it!)
     
  2. scotchirish

    scotchirish Member

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    I've heard a few takes on this, how old are you? how long have you been masturbating? do you tend to deathgrip when you masterbate? do you have to be in one or specific positions to cum when you masturbate, i.e. laying down? if any of this is true likely you've trained yourself to only climax under these conditions, the solution is to just have normal sex, jack-off with lube and don't grasp too hard, if you don't cum from that, then you're not going to cum that time around, you have to retrain your penis to respond to normal stimulation, it will eventually learn that it's not going to get its release how it used to.
     
  3. D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead

    D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead Account Disabled

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    I'd give yourself a few more times before worrying about it. First fucks are seldom the best for anyone. Get back with your girl and just enjoy.
     
  4. BigDallasDick8x6

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    My best advice: just have fun and don't worry about it and soon it will happen as you get more comfortable being with her.
     
  5. D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead

    D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead Account Disabled

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    Yeah, hey P-Sam, I just went back and read the thread about being a virgin at 29. Look, this is probably a VERY BIG deal in your mind. I mean, not to put words in your mouth or thoughts in your brain, but this must have been something you've been thinking about and dreaming about for a very long time.

    So it can be hard to just relax into it the first time. Knowing what I know now, I would set a goal of having a good time and showing your lady friend as good a time as possible, and let your orgasm happen when it's ready to happen. It will!
     
  6. BigDallasDick8x6

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    PS: Any 18 year old str8 dudes needing someone to practice with, hit me up. I'll teach you how to drive both of you crazy with your penis. No charge! Oh, don't thank me.....
     
  7. B_dxjnorto

    B_dxjnorto New Member

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    Or if you're circumcised tightly. Cut guys sometimes get used to handling themselves roughly because that's what works. Intercourse is different.

    I married at 28 and couldn't feel much with intercourse.
     
  8. D_Parkinsonne Partycocke

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    Dude, you are not alone... I lost my "penetration virginity" at 24. I didn't cum from my first penetration experience either. I don't think too many guys actually do. I have more than made up for it since then! Cumming from a BJ has never happened to me. It takes me a while to cum regularly, and I think it is a duration issue with the BJs, but we keep trying!

    I agree with djx about "handling". I handle myself pretty tightly, and it is different when my girl does a handjob, or bj, or anything. So that might be part of the issue for you.

    So don't feel bad about it- you are not alone- if at first you don't succeed- you know how the rest of it goes... It will happen, just enjoy the act, and relax... When it does happen, it will be fantastic- trust me! Congrats and good luck!
     
    #8 D_Parkinsonne Partycocke, Aug 3, 2009
    Last edited: Aug 3, 2009
  9. PatriotSam

    PatriotSam New Member

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    I wanted to leave a little update on this situation.

    Since i made this post my "problem" has been completely solved.

    We had a little turmoil after the first few days of trying but after a pivitol confrontation where we both where feeling bad about ourselfs, everything was iorned out.

    I felt a little guilty at the solution since it was that I had to close my eyes and visualize a more physically idealistic woman while having sex with the woman I was with. However, once I came inside her it was like the nerves in my cock where rewired to climax with the new stimulation and it wasn't a problem after that point ... now I don't have to to anything but look at the expression on her face while I'm inside her to push me over the edge.

    The best part about the whole situation is that i'm still able to hold back for a long time before my climax builds to an uncontrollable point.

    We actually had sex one night for an hour and a half where she lost track of how many times she had come and when I came it was so intense that she was tremendously turned on at how animalistic I was.

    All in all, my first string of sexual experiences have become an incredible!

    The nice thing about the whole experience is that the problem was completly solved in less than a week.
     
  10. B_dxjnorto

    B_dxjnorto New Member

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    Good for you Sam. It's like they always say. The brain is the biggest sex organ. Three Cheers!
     
  11. lickme69

    lickme69 New Member

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    Until I read your second post, I was going to suggest that you try to visualize something that really turns you on. Glad that you solved your own problem.
     
  12. Kayden96

    Kayden96 New Member

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    Porn desensitization?
     
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