Can't get off from intercourse, but still like big?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by bgr_thn_avrg, Nov 11, 2009.

  1. bgr_thn_avrg

    bgr_thn_avrg New Member

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    I had a girlfriend who couldn't get off from penetration. She had to have her clit stimulated to have an orgasm. When it came to the intercourse, she often seemed not so excited, or would lose momentum after a short time. She did like to do "exciting" or "hot" things in intercourse. Like taking her doggy style while she was trying to get ready, or sex in public places. I assume she felt the excitement helped to compensate for the lack of being able to come through penetration. *My real question is...Do you have the same issue with not getting off with intercourse? And do you really enjoy penetration that much? And is size still so much a stimulating thing?
     
  2. Patchos

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    I'm one of those women who can only orgasm from clitoral stimulation. Penetration with a big dick feels fantastic, but it doesn't take me over the edge. My vagina can stretch to accommodate a larger penis and it feels wonderful so that's why I prefer larger one. I also like the visual and feeling it heavy in my hands, etc.

    I don't get as much pleasure from having sex with a below average sized penis, regardless of the fact that I only orgasm clitorally. This is because I don't always feel the need to orgasm every time I have sex. Sometimes I just want a big dick in me.
     
  3. Serial Kisser

    Serial Kisser Well-Known Member

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    I've had different experiences with this. I've been lucky enough to be with a few big men. And not one of them have gotten me off. I still love it, it still feels great. I love the feel of that first penetration, the stretch and fullness. I finally had an orgasm this summer with a guy who wasn't big at all. Hopefully, he opened the flood gates so to speak for the next man.
     
  4. Attila the Hung

    Attila the Hung Active Member

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    Some women just cant get off thru sex alone, no matter how much you may try to make it happen. I`ve been with my gf for close to ten years now, and I have tried EVERYTHING to try and make her orgasm thru penetration, but it simply isn`t going to happen as she isn`t wired that way, she needs the clitoral stimulation to push her over the edge.
     
  5. whatireallywant

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    I am able to cum by penetration, and definitely can ONLY cum that way from a big guy.

    I am also able to cum clitorally, and have done so with one average sized guy - he was REALLY good with his hands - and his Hollywood leading-man good looks didn't hurt, either! :smile:
     
  6. Candie

    Candie New Member

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    ive never gotten off vaginally. i think its quite rare to be able to do that in the age im in too. i believe its when woman get a bit older those muscles will be more active and trained up. ive been close though. i envy all the girls which are able to get vagasm. i believe a thicker penis is better than a thinner one in any case. the vag is loosing feeling after a while, if its too thin. well thats my experience anyway.
     
  7. STRONGBACK

    STRONGBACK New Member

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    It always amazes me when i hear that women orgasm rarely from vaginal intercourse not that i am saying that is a pathological thing. I think some ppl get so excited just seeing or manually touching a larger than average size penis that they orgasm from purely psychological reasons. Who is to say that those of us that orgasm during vaginal penetration arent having a psychological effect? I myself have come just seeing a big one. However personally the orgasm during intromission is very intense contactions of gspot stimulation-so for me it is not psychological and i suspect that there are more than a few on this board that share my feelings here- that there are some of us that can get a reflexive gspot orgasm from deep penetration and it is not just psychological.
    I dont think this is a quality of sex issue as I have noticed those that cannot achieve orgasm from penetration make up for it in many other ways so i guess everybody has differing talents!
     
  8. Serial Kisser

    Serial Kisser Well-Known Member

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    I don't know if it's an age thing as far as a comfort thing. I'm 24 and just orgasmed with a man for the first time in my life. Never came from being fingered, eaten or sex. This guy was WAY kinkier than me, so I felt pretty relaxed that anything I did wouldn't be judged. He was very dominant. And he just worked my gspot like it was going out of style. He was barely 6in a little above average thickness, nothing too crazy. And he just really worked me. We had amazing sexual chemistry and all that together = orgasms. He thought it was crazy that I had never cum before. I also think if you concentrate too hard it's never going to happen. That guy I was with - we fooled around three times. The first time - nothing. The second time, I came on his fingers squirting like crazy - he realized that I could do that and it was intense and amazing - and the third time we actually had sex and I was beggggging him to stop making me cum. Once it happens for you, it'll be easier and easier.
     
  9. tasteslikejellyjam

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    From years of selling dildos back in college...
    I have talked to many women...
    most women don't like penetration...
    most women were into the pocket rockets...
    few women ever can for something just for penetration...
    some liked both & would get things according to that... (ie vibrating cock rings & rabbits (dildo with clit vibe)...
    but over all we sold almost only clit vibes...
    personally I like... I have both orgasms & tend to like to combine the two...
    makes for one powerful orgasm but I can cum from each independently as well...
    I would say 95% of all the women I talked to not only disliked penetration but hated it...
    but I also believe some men are to blame for lack of skill...
    which is not uncommon... buying the Kama Sutra is the best advice I can give a man...
    also being a little more sensual from time to time can help...
    makes ladies feel more connected to you & special...
    not all the time but sometimes...
    sometimes that is all that lacking... =)

    PS a lot of women have been taught that penis is gross... so some have a mental thing about even handling them... I also found most women are uncomfortable with sexuality in general... they tense up with certain expectations of themselves... COMMUNICATION is the key... even if she is shy... try talking to her... do things that let her know you care as well... like surprising her with edible lotions & what not... little things help bring people out of their shells & relax as well... =)
     
    #9 tasteslikejellyjam, Nov 12, 2009
    Last edited: Nov 12, 2009
  10. cougarblue

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    I have female acquaintances who tell me they are "multi-orgasmic" and I still feel a bit inadequate when I talk to them. I rarely rarely rarely getoff orally...and the last time was when I was married. That was 5 years ago. My ex told me he learned how to lick pussy from a bi-sexual woman. Go Figure!

    But then again....I can makeout on the beach, fully clothed, rubbing against a hard cock, and I will GET OFF. In less than 5 minutes.

    Go Figure.

    And I can usually getoff when I'm on top. Size and Fit seem to be the key.

    The mind is a powerful thing, I know. It continues to mystify me.
     
  11. tasteslikejellyjam

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    honey... all men think they are the shit at oral sex...
    and some of them just aren't... XD
    those are the ones you have to say...
    quit lying to yourself! why are you lying to yourself! quit lying to yourself! *sung in the tune of quit hitting yourself* XD
     
  12. whatireallywant

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    You can blame repressive upbringings and for the hating penetration part, possibly a combination of repressive upbringings and society's expectations of what women "are supposed to like". I mean, I LOVE penetration (the deeper the better)! It's the main reason I'm straight and not bi! And I have both clit stimulating toys and penetrating toys. Strangely enough, I had some repression in my own upbringing as well, but it manifests itself differently. I have no qualms about penetration or handling a penis (I LOVE giving hand jobs too!!!), but I do have problems with French kissing, and to a lesser extent, with blowjobs (I'm trying to at least get over the problems with blowjobs, and really, it depends on who I'm with on that).
     
  13. tasteslikejellyjam

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    I have to say I had problems with penis because of myths...
    but when I started selling dildos & became the porn watching queen...
    I shed a lot of doubts & misconceptions...
    it was liberating & exhilarating...
    I have a hard time now with my male partners being open about sex & their fetishes because it has been deemed dirty by women...
    FUCK THAT!!!
    I almost married a cross dresser (not bi or gay... just a little fucked up... XD)
    I still have fantasies about slowly taking a legging off with my teeth...
    lightly wrapping it around his neck & fucking his brains out...
    but again... maybe I just got bored with the over exposure...
    the experience was good though... made me more open & tolerant... =)


    PS it takes talent to give good hand jobs...
    its harder then most people think... =O
    blow jobs are hard for most women...
    it doesn't help if the guy has a crap diet too...
    then the precum/cum can be not very yummy... fruits & veggies do help...
    if your partner is forceful during blow jobs... help them understand you would like to go at your own pace...
    explore it like its a new & wonderful animal... XD
    french kissing... I have had some amazing kissers & some really shitty ones...
    and the shitty ones are the worse... you just want to get away... XD
    try coming up for breath more... licking the lips... nuzzling the face...
    its a polite way to break up bad kissing...
    and sometimes you can retrain them through taking the lead...
    holding the back of the neck to stop them from pressing too hard...
    make it seem like you're just playing & teasing with being dominant...
    eventually they take your lead... =)
     
    #13 tasteslikejellyjam, Nov 13, 2009
    Last edited: Nov 13, 2009
  14. dolfette

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    i can't orgasm from food but i still love chocolate more than carrot.
     
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