Catching your man watching porn?

[Mule]

If u ever caught/discovered ur man (is) watching porn.... whether it actually happened before or just suppose it happens one day...what was/would ur reaction be more like:

Jesus, can't you type in full words and sentences? Are you 12? What's with all the text speak and unnecessary ellipses?

 

[286798]

with ur last bf...did u ever actually watch any porn together?

No. I had asked a brought it up a few times and he never went for it. I think he was just a little too vanilla all around to be comfortable with it. I don't think it was anything too extreme... what I saw was just big boobs (mine aren't) so maybe he thought I'd feel self conscious about what he liked.

i lasted TOO long!!!

Nope. That never happened with my wasband. Ever.

 

[rtg]

Would u really watch porn with ur man?? have u ever done it before?!

although i am thinking it might be really fun and exciting...but for me...i think it would be very hard for me to do it with my wife!! i mean... it would be very awkward / embarrassing... and as u mentioned.. i might feel guilty for letting her know that i enjoy watching porn that she might start feeling insecure...

and Thanks for sharing ur thoughts on this

Yeah. I've done it with a fwb and with an ex. I think only once with each. It's something I'd consider doing more often with a significant other.

It's funny that a lot of guys seem to be amazed with women who like porn? Maybe most of the women they've previously come across have been conservative and / or would never let anyone else know they watch it. I do have girlfriends that think porn is disgusting and would be horrified if they caught their man watching it.

 

[rtg]

Oh and I've also showed numerous guys I've dated two girls one cup, just for shits and giggles. Couldn't believe they hadn't seen it before.

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

Porn is boring for the both of us.

 

[AlteredEgo]

5- Good for Him! It will actually help him be more satisfied...less stressed... he can actually learn new tricks from porn that will benefit me in the end!!

I can tell when a man is trying to apply pornstar bullshit to me. Porn is not real life. There is almost nothing for porn to teach a man about pleasing me. There is nothing I cannot teach him myself if he just pays attention.

I don't care if dudes watch porn. All I would want to know is does he want some privacy, or does he want me to join him in some capacity. I'm generally open to either. The only exception to this was my husband, because he was almost never intetested in sex, so I felt cheated when the rare times he wanted to be sexual he wanted to be sexual without me. Then, I figured out most of his porn watching was transexuals and began to suspect the problem was my lack of male DNA. So, as long ad porn isn't a symptom of a problem, it is fine by me.

 

[SSS79]

I think you can ask the Moderators to move it... but like I said, no biggie. Just helping out a new member with navigation. Women's issues is more for discussions about things that mainly/only pertain to women. Ask A Woman is for questions directed specifically at females.

One partner catching the other watching porn isn't a female specific issue.

I hope that helps you out a bit.

As far as what we watch together, there's a good variety. Gotta keep it spicy. 2 ladies together, 2 ladies and a fella, straight sex, anal.. yeah. We like to watch some stuffs.

Just out of curiosity, if you may allow me to ask: is there any type of porn that you would just watch alone and not allow your partner to see you watching/ share watching with you? and the same question regarding your man, would he watch certain genres that he wouldn't watch with you?!
and also...what do you usually do while watching together?

 

[SSS79]

Porn is boring for the both of us.

Good for you!

BUT, are you sure he is not hiding it from you?!!

 

[SSS79]

I can tell when a man is trying to apply pornstar bullshit to me. Porn is not real life. There is almost nothing for porn to teach a man about pleasing me. There is nothing I cannot teach him myself if he just pays attention.

I don't care if dudes watch porn. All I would want to know is does he want some privacy, or does he want me to join him in some capacity. I'm generally open to either. The only exception to this was my husband, because he was almost never intetested in sex, so I felt cheated when the rare times he wanted to be sexual he wanted to be sexual without me. Then, I figured out most of his porn watching was transexuals and began to suspect the problem was my lack of male DNA. So, as long ad porn isn't a symptom of a problem, it is fine by me.

Although i totally AGREE: Porn is not real life: mostly acting, faking things ....etc, BUT are you sure there is NOTHING men can learn from porn to please a woman?! NOTHING??
I believe you would teach him yourself, but let me ask, haven't you learned anything yourself from porn at all, whether about pleasing yourself or your man??!

 

[SSS79]

Jesus, can't you type in full words and sentences? Are you 12? What's with all the text speak and unnecessary ellipses?

i apologize for that, i'm a bit new here! NOW, i understand i shouldn't use much abbreviations, and no ellipses anymore, i promise! Forgive me for that!

 

[SSS79]

I wouldn't care. The only thing I might note is if it's something very out of the ordinary from stuff we do or have talked about. Neither of us are that big on porn, other than sometimes watching blooper type stuff or fails because they're funny.

sorry, but what are "blooper type stuff" and "fails"? i don't know what does this mean?

 

[693987]

sorry, but what are "blooper type stuff" and "fails"? i don't know what does this mean?

Sites like efukt for example.

 

[693987]

And adding on a response to what you're asking AE, no, there isn't a single fucking thing I can think of in any of probably the several hundred different porn clips/movies/etc that I have seen where I think my man could learn anything.

At worst, I would say some of it is degrading, shitty treatment of women. As for the best, some of it is just ridiculous shit done purely for the camera, with lots of overblown exaggerated stuff. The rare gems that seem more genuine, it's just regular people fucking. My sweetie doesn't need to learn how to do that. He already knows how to have sex with me in a way we both enjoy. He learned this from paying attention when we're intimate and hours of conversation over years about it.

 

[SSS79]

Oh and I've also showed numerous guys I've dated two girls one cup, just for shits and giggles. Couldn't believe they hadn't seen it before.

OMG!! this is the first time for me to see this term "two girls one cup" so i just finished googling about it, WHAT THE HECK!!! are you serious?!! i never thought such a (i don't know what adjective should i use!) thing should exist!
You are bad!!! you shouldn't have let me know about this!!!! i'm in total shock!

 

[693987]

I should clarify that it didn't take years for the sex to be good

It has been very good from the very first time, which is fucking awesome He ranks in my top 3, and those top three are different enough from each other it's not something I quantity/order further.

 

[SSS79]

Yeah. I've done it with a fwb and with an ex. I think only once with each. It's something I'd consider doing more often with a significant other.

It's funny that a lot of guys seem to be amazed with women who like porn? Maybe most of the women they've previously come across have been conservative and / or would never let anyone else know they watch it. I do have girlfriends that think porn is disgusting and would be horrified if they caught their man watching it.

Forgive my curiosity, but what were you both doing while watching together? just watching / commenting and discusiing what is being watched / doing anything erotic or sexual / ??? what type of porn was it?, who chose: you or them?!!

I'd say it's very unlikely to meet a girl who REALLY like porn, or as far as i know! i'd find her "one of a kind" someway!!! WHY? i don't know exactly, you tell me!! and i expect most of the women around would react the way you described (horrified) or at least (shocked); but let me ask you this: how many girls have you come across in your life that like watching porn? can you give an estimate to a percentage among all other girls who do not watch it?

 

[SSS79]

I should clarify that it didn't take years for the sex to be good

It has been very good from the very first time, which is fucking awesome He ranks in my top 3, and those top three are different enough from each other it's not something I quantity/order further.

taking years of communication and discussing and teaching each other would be GREAT! you must be patient so you can get the real reward!!!! lol...

you know what, i really think through time, with the same partner, DEFINITELY sex gets better! if you really love/care for each other

 

[AlteredEgo]

Although i totally AGREE: Porn is not real life: mostly acting, faking things ....etc, BUT are you sure there is NOTHING men can learn from porn to please a woman?! NOTHING??
I believe you would teach him yourself, but let me ask, haven't you learned anything yourself from porn at all, whether about pleasing yourself or your man??!

There is almost nothing for porn to teach a man about pleasing me.

I doubt there is even one tiny morsel, but have left room for possibility in my wording.

Once, over a decade ago, I caught Heather Hunter twisting her head to push the head of a penis into her throat. It was the one thing I was missing information wise. It was incomplete information though.

I have found I often need lube, and that my throat is drier than it feels to me. Porn never showed me that. I'm still learning. For a few years, my wisdom teeth were in the way. I learned that after they were removed. I had no idea they were still growing and had gotten much larger than when I first learned to deep throat. Porn didn't help me with that. I have learned that my esophageal opening must not be symmetrical. If the corona is, I have to have his help pushing down on my head as I try to angle it to my right side and give that little head twist or it won't go in.

All I learned from Ms. Hunter was to twist my head, which really, from her example, just looks like enough. I had to learn from experience it is not. Experience would have led me to that conclusion eventually anyway. My mouth is a fucking rock star.

 

[SSS79]

And adding on a response to what you're asking AE, no, there isn't a single fucking thing I can think of in any of probably the several hundred different porn clips/movies/etc that I have seen where I think my man could learn anything.

At worst, I would say some of it is degrading, shitty treatment of women. As for the best, some of it is just ridiculous shit done purely for the camera, with lots of overblown exaggerated stuff. The rare gems that seem more genuine, it's just regular people fucking. My sweetie doesn't need to learn how to do that. He already knows how to have sex with me in a way we both enjoy. He learned this from paying attention when we're intimate and hours of conversation over years about it.

are you kidding me? let me ask you this, where did u first get all your sexual knowledge? By the way, i TOTALLY agree about all the things you said about porn, BUT, you wanna tell me you NEVER got any hint/idea from porn to apply in your real sex life? a new position maybe? some combination of acts? Nothing at all ever in porn ever provoked you?
would you tell me that real sex life would have been exactly the same if porn NEVER existed?! i certainly doubt that!

 

[693987]

taking years of communication and discussing and teaching each other would be GREAT! you must be patient so you can get the real reward!!!! lol...

you know what, i really think through time, with the same partner, DEFINITELY sex gets better! if you really love/care for each other

You're misunderstanding. Again. The sex has been awesome since the first time. All that has changed is minor amounts of finesse and me gradually introducing him to BDSM. There is no "get the real reward". Him paying attention to his partner is something he did way before me. Me paying attention to my partner is something I did way before him.

It's more him learning the exact way I like my hair pulled for example, or exactly how hard I like being bitten. The core knowledge and him caring about a partner's pleasure has been around since way before me.