Challenging Heteronormativity

[Blagoblog]

Do any other straight guys wish they could mince and swish like this guy and still find acceptance? (I mean not that effeminate gay men are well-regarded even by gay society either but still).

 

[Onslow]

Do any other straight guys wish they could prance around like this guy and still find acceptance? (I mean not that effeminate gay men are well-regarded even by gay society either but still).

Do I look like a fucking reindeer? Prancer pranced Otheres dance.

And what exactly are you asking or implying?

 

[Blagoblog]

Do I look like a fucking reindeer? Prancer pranced Otheres dance.

And what exactly are you asking or implying?

I'm basically asking for other effeminate straight men to talk about their experiences or the repression they have felt during their lives.

 

[B_VinylBoy]

Guys like that are not looking for validation from people like "you". They know they're gay, get tons of slack from it from insecure people who question their own sexuality every minute of the day, and are not afraid to do what they feel because the people that matter to them the most accept them.

I can only wonder what you think about people like this.

 

[Blagoblog]

Guys like that are not looking for validation from people like "you". They know they're gay

I'm referring to those who routinely violate the norms of hegemonic masculinity and are not gay

 

[B_VinylBoy]

I'm referring to those who routinely violate the norms of hegemonic masculinity and are not gay

He's not violating anything! He's making a silly, fashion model & runway video for YouTube. Perhaps if you actually saw the guy's website you'd know that this particular person doesn't mean any harm.

The concept of masculinity goes much deeper than what society accepts as "social norms". I'd much rather see a straight person who is comfortable with their own sexuality not be afraid to "prance around" (as you said it), then watch a gay person, due to their own insecurities & paranoid feelings of social perception, fight to stay in a closet just to be liked by closed-minded people.

 

[Catchoftheday]

I think you are going to have to be a bit more clear as to what you mean by "prance around".

 

[Blagoblog]

^I used different words instead

He's not violating anything! He's making a silly, fashion model & runway video for YouTube. Perhaps if you actually saw the guy's website you'd know that this particular person doesn't mean any harm.

The concept of masculinity goes much deeper than what society accepts as "social norms". I'd much rather see a straight person who is comfortable with their own sexuality not be afraid to "prance around" (as you said it), then watch a gay person, due to their own insecurities & paranoid feelings of social perception, fight to stay in a closet just to be liked by closed-minded people.

ok then we kinda are on the same page; also I did visit his site before making this thread and never indicated that he meant to be harmful

it turns out to be really hard to find video examples of the kind of thing I was thinking about (and I settled on a gay guy demonstrating that behavior when picking out the video but the fact that he's gay isn't important here); most of the time when you look up terms like "sissy" or "mincing" you get sissy maids, forced feminization, and MtFs, and I was thinking of cisgender heterosexual men who don't cross-dress but widely seen as gay because of how they act, mainly because I am, and I especially was as a kid (like I wasn't aware I walked like a girl, it just seemed more natural to me).

 

[Deno]

I need to get me a dictionary.

 

[Drifterwood]

I'm referring to those who routinely violate the norms of hegemonic masculinity and are not gay

I know what you mean. I did it when I was in my teens and in a band that idolised David Bowie.

Perhaps you have used an incorrect expression, but it is ultimately about acceptance of yourself as a man within all the possibilities of masculinity.

 

[BIGBULL29]

I'd much rather see a straight person who is comfortable with their own sexuality not be afraid to "prance around" (as you said it), then watch a gay person, due to their own insecurities & paranoid feelings of social perception, fight to stay in a closet just to be liked by closed-minded people.

Great point! :wink:

 

[jjsjr]

Unless I'm misinterpreting the OP, I'm a bit offended by this thread.

I can share my experiences of what it feels like to live as a gay man getting harassed for moving "swishy" and talking lispy, yet still trying to fit in with social norms. Even after coming out, it's a social battle. I just got the sneers and jeers the other day at a bar. I'm proud of who I am and I'm not going back in time to have to hide or defend myself.